#sorry too many words I know HAHA
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greeblegrub · 8 months ago
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This is a series of collage works that show my witnessing and interpretation of my grandma’s descent into dementia, an illness that gradually robs a person of memories, timelines and human connections. Her mind has completely forgotten how time works - old memories become entangled with new ones, gaps in her memory are filled in with imagined scenarios. One moment she is 86, the next moment she is 6. Her world is a deconstruction.
My grandma was a tailor in her younger days. She sewed my first blanket, pillow case and made me dresses as I grew up. My memories of my grandmother will always be entwined and held together with physical memories of thread, fabric and stitching. Before her dementia got worse, she used to remind my mother that her sewing machine should be passed on to me in future. She used to collect some scrap fabrics and buttons for me to play with, and some of these are featured in the artworks.
Collage 1: A Portrait of Dementia
A portrait of my grandma created by combining an old and recent photo, cut up and reconstructed. This represents how she often confuses the past for the present day. She forgets her age and how time has taken its toll on her body. She pulls at her skin, shocked at the wrinkles and age spots that have formed. She often forgets her physical limits, surprised by the frailness of her own body.
Collage 2: The Structure of Dementia
A grid of old photos is held together with stitches in red thread. It begins with old memories, the ones clearer in my grandma’s mind, and in chronological order. These photos show her in spaces that held significant memories, such as her wedding venue, her holiday destinations and her daughters’ homes. This represents the period of her life before the dementia set in. As the grid progresses, the stitches become more and more messy, and the grid begins to lose its structure. Memories and locations start to overlap, breaking the grid. Stitches zig zag back and forth and pull apart at the seams. My grandma now tells us stories that no longer have any sense of chronology, space or connection, and my memories of her begin to get distorted alongside.
Collage 3: Re-weaving my Grandma’s past
This collage is constructed with scraps of thread, fabric and paper woven together. The weaving represents how I am forced to reweave together the stories of my grandmother’s life, based on the scraps and disjointed tales I have been told. There are many ‘loose ends’, that I am not yet able to find a place for, and properly weave back into the story. Thus for now, they remain hanging.
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microwavetoaster-selfships · 2 months ago
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Okay okay. I'm going to ricochet on my blog a little bit today in the sense that I have like three different things that I want to talk about from three different medias uhm. First thing. I'm just gonna say it now and I'm trying to think of it from an outside perspective because me saying this I'm being so silly over it but from an outside perspective it's like. Yeah okay. Anywho uhm. So apperently. D.octor Who has two hearts and. Therefor two heart beats. And for some reason my first thought was "oh hey that's nice" and not. Some sort of shock or anything. I'm not even the type of person that goes all out with like yknow. Looking up those videos of a heartbeat and sticking it under your pillow and laying your head on it and being all relaxed like that like youre laying on someones chest so I don't know why the guy running in doubletime is catching my interest with it. Maybe it's because it actually we actually hear it? And so it didn't like. Hhhhururhrht. It's one of those things that on paper you just shrug your shoulders at and then it happens and you're like OH!! OHHH...!! Yknow it's like yeah sure whatever getting flowers, that's cheesy I want something more and then it happens and you're like WHAT? THE HELL????? FLOEERS? FOR ME?!?(or something like that. Just something as a comparison I don't know.) And. Why do I have several.things to say about this
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saetiate · 26 days ago
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okay i ran out of space in the tags when i was almost finished sorry for the additional short comments here :') please read the tags first and then this comment ahaha i have been commenting as i go through!!! tldr this is a beautiful fic i have been so excited to read it and your writing is brilliant!!!
OHMYGOD THE WAY THAT MYDEI WAS CAPTURED??? omg this plot twist... waugasf;jds i cannot believe this i am jaw dropped fr
WAHH IM SO EXCITED TO READ THE NEXT PART!!! i love that at the end he allows reader to feed him :') I WANNA KNOWW what the conditions are and how he gets out and i wanna see him and reader's relationship progress!!! im so excited ahaha this has been so fun!!! thank you for sharing your writing w the world!!!
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Series Synopsis: When the husband you’ve never met returns from the war you’ve never understood, he comes bearing a strange and inexplicable gift — a prince in chains who he refuses to kill.
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Series Masterlist
Pairing: Mydei x F!Reader
Chapter Word Count: 10.2k
Content Warnings: pls check the masterlist there is. a lot. and i’m not retyping all of that LOL
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A/N: I AM SOO SCARED TO POST THIS NGL LMAOAO like i said in the warnings i literally. have not played amphoreus yet. idek anything about mydei SDKJH i am so worried i will disappoint everyone who's expressed interest in reading this HAHA i was also. not expecting anyone to do that tbh. BUT thank you all for your kind words on the masterlist and i hope this lives up to expectations at least a bit!!
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You spent the day of your wedding with a man made of marble — a stand-in for your new husband, who was off fighting in a war of the kind which had neither cause nor, seemingly, end. The statue was carved in his image and sneered down at you as you whispered to it, swearing vows of duty and obedience and docility, but, in spite or maybe because of its detached lifelessness, you found its presence to be a kindness. What did it say of your husband, that you preferred the company of that dead stone to him? Perhaps very much, or perhaps very little. 
He is a generous man, the servants assured you, giggling amongst themselves, exchanging knowing looks as they dragged you into the foreign palace where you would spend the rest of your days. You will want for nothing.
It was draftier than your home, the wind bouncing off of the white walls and nipping at you skin. You spent your time buried under seven-and-twenty layers of furs and fabrics, lying in an unfamiliar bed and flinching away from the shadows upon the ceiling. This was an idle and dull way to waste away your existence, and yet you could not bring yourself to do anything else, trapped in the mire of waiting and waiting for your husband’s return.
He came back in the third month, which was as auspicious as anything. They loved that number here, you had come to find: three, the symbol of fortune and fate, of magic and mischief, of power and punishment. Three vows sworn; three blessings granted; three months passed before you finally met the man you had married.
There was much fanfare about his arrival. When you peered out of the window, you saw that the streets were stuffed to the bursting with throngs of people shoving one another around, hissing and biting as they craned their necks. At first it surprised you — was he truly so loved here, even when he was elsewhere despised? — but then you realized that it was not your husband upon his charger that they were all lined up to meet. Rather, it was the procession following him which captured their interests, the spoils of war which he displayed with a juvenile, worthless pride.
A triad of elephants covered in finely wrought armor, their heads hung low and resigned, their plodding walks spiritless and lame. A herd of sheep with silver wool, dotting the dark cobblestones like a cluster of stars, stumbling along at the prodding of a soldier-turned-shepherd. A wagon filled with spears and swords, ostensibly once neatly stacked, now a matted mess of steel and bronze. Vases carried in the arms of the younger men, overflowing with coins that trailed after them like breadcrumbs, snatched up by the most daring of the onlookers, who did not fear rebuke. And, finally, in a place so honorable it could only have been mocking—
“Lady,” a soft voice said. You drew your coat tighter around you, although today was, by all accounts, warm for the season, and pretended like you did not hear the girl. She sighed and then tugged on your arm insistently; perhaps it was improper, but there wasn’t anyone who would chide her for it. “You have been summoned by his majesty.”
Hadn’t you known this would happen eventually? Hadn’t you expected it? You had had your time to come to terms with it, which was more than most got, and so there was no excuse for the reluctance which choked your throat and stilled your footsteps. This was your duty, this was what you had sworn, and so — and so you could not hesitate.
“Lady…” the girl said with another sigh. You pretended to be all-consumed with the action of closing the curtains, your back to her as you struggled to force a smile onto your face. When you deemed your expression acceptable, you spun around and nodded at her.
“It will not do to keep him waiting,” you said, motioning for her to lead the way. She did so without complaint, perhaps relieved that you were not giving her further trouble; even now, the servants did not know what to think of you, could not quite fathom what category of being you were. Some were fond of you, but most treated you with a careful distrust that you could not blame them for, even though you sometimes wanted to.
The grand entrance hall of the palace opened to the mouth of the road, which swelled out into a sprawling courtyard. Its centerpiece was an enormous fountain which sprayed a fine, cool mist into the air no matter the time of year, and it was by this fountain that you waited, wringing your hands as your husband drew nearer and nearer. Belatedly, you thought that you should try to conceal your distress, but there was nothing to be done about it now. The best you could do was say, if you were asked, that it was simply the joy of a bride faced with the prospect of a reunion with her beloved. Nobody would question that, although then again, nobody questioned you very much in general, so it was doubtful that you’d even have to use the quick excuse.
Your husband’s warhorse was a sprightly, slender beast, its coat the dappled grey of royalty, its face pretty and dished in the way of the Eastern breeds. When it paused in front of you, it shoved its black muzzle into your shoulder, nearly knocking you down, and then it stomped its hoof when your husband tightened the reins, pulling it back before dismounting and handing it off to a waiting stableboy. 
“My apologies, dear lady,” he said, bowing before you with as much gallantry as you had been told he possessed. His voice was gentle and amused, his face even more handsome in flesh than it had been in stone; you should’ve, by all rights, felt pleased. You were married to this man. You belonged to him. How many women wished to be in your place? Yet all you could muster was fear, throttling and all-consuming. He was beautiful in the way of a snake, and you knew without knowing that he was poised, in some way, to strike.
“It is alright,” you said, disguising the tremble of your voice with a broad, false grin. “I am glad to finally make your acquaintance…my lord.”
The address was unfamiliar on your tongue. What would your younger self, that girl who had never known subservience nor strife, say if she saw you ducking your head in defeated compliance? How she would laugh! How she would pity you! My lord. But he was exactly that.
“The sentiment is returned in full,” he said, and then he extended his arms in a grand, sweeping motion. “Indeed, to celebrate this momentous occasion, I have arranged for you a gift!”
“A gift?” you repeated. Certainly, you had asked for no such thing, and you did not have the time to school your face into neutrality, naked surprise flashing across it. Your husband chuckled at the sight, nodding at you.
“I have brought the finest of plunders for you, dear lady,” he said, and your stomach twisted into knots at the familiarity with which he spoke to you, as if you were affable lovers instead of strangers. “Even your father’s treasures, vast and bountiful as they may be, cannot compare to this!”
The mention of your father stabbed at your heart, and hidden in the folds of your coat, you clenched your fists. Your father, the richest man in the world…and yet your husband dared compare his meager gift to that? You wanted to spit in his face that for your third birthday, your father had gifted you a villa made of gold, the walls inlaid with gemstones and painted with flowers. Indeed, you might’ve goaded him in such a way if you had the capabilities, but then you noticed what the army-men were bringing forth and your mouth suddenly refused to move.
It was the prisoner, the one kept in a place of honor by your husband and his soldiers, the one who the entire empire had ridiculed as he had been paraded through it like a champion hound. He was tall, towering over the army-men flanking him, and although his eyes drooped nearly shut, there was a heat to his demeanor, a severe, ferocious anger which shone through his exhaustion. He seemed like more of a half-tamed jungle cat than a man, and indeed when he halted before you, you half-expected him to snarl, to bare bloody fangs and lunge at your throat with fingers like claws, like swords, tearing through your neck as if it were paper.
“When he’s like this, you almost forget what a monster he can be,” your husband mused, reaching out and flicking the man on the forehead with a snicker. “Isn’t he all but lovely? Oh, don’t worry, dear lady, he can’t do anything to you. He’s under the influence of a sleeping draught at the moment, and anyways, those chains are thrice-blessed. It’s perfectly safe.”
The chains he spoke of were as gold as the man’s hair, looping around his wrists and forearms, curling over the red marks emblazoned on his shimmering skin, weaving in between his legs and around his torso. They were sturdy and gleamed with the power of their three blessings, and although you still understood little about this strange place with its strange power, you could tell that it would take a great force, greater than was possessed by any mere man or deity, to break them.
“He’s the prince of Kremnos,” your husband said when your shock stretched on. “A right beast, I’ll say. We almost fell to his efforts, but in the end, we bested him — as you can see. What do you think? Do you like him?”
“He’s — it’s — horrible,” you said, your skin crawling the longer and longer you stared at the prince, your words a jumble, your head spinning. You wanted to be anywhere but in this courtyard, in front of this fallen man, who was kept alive for — for what? For amusement? For play? As a gift?
“Isn’t he?” your husband said, patting you on the shoulder with a grim smile. “And now he is yours.”
The thrice-blessed chains flashed in the sun, and you shook your head, both in refusal and to clear your vision of the blinding, searing spots they left in it.
“I have no need of a prisoner,” you said, and although your tone remained ever-muted, you spoke as cuttingly as you could manage to. “What will I do with him? Why do you torture him so? You bested him; if he was as fierce an opponent as you claim, then the least you owe him is a death with dignity. Kill him and be done with the matter. Why have you brought him all this way? I don’t want him.”
“He will die, eventually,” my husband said. “I shall execute him myself when it comes to it, but the time is not yet right. I don’t expect you to understand such matters, and neither should you trouble yourself with doing so…but know this, dear lady: you cannot give back a gift once it has been freely given. You can do what you’d like with him now that he is yours, but you cannot refuse him. Perhaps that is how affairs were conducted in your backwards land, but here it is not so.”
You wanted my land, you longed to say. You took me from my father and wed me to a statue in search of it. And still you call it backward? But you could not, so instead, you turned away — away from the prince, who was close to crumpling and only remained standing out of sheer will, and away from your husband, who beamed as if he had done something great or wonderful.
“I will retire now,” you said. Do not follow me. This remained implied, unsaid, but a fool your husband was not, and so he only hummed in agreement.
“Be well, dear lady,” he said. “My messengers have told me that you are having difficulties adjusting to the climate here. I shall be sure to pray for your feeble constitution.”
“Thank you, my lord,” you said, stiffly, primly. It scratched like bile and you hated every minute of it, but you had no recourse for the matter, so you swallowed it down, as you always did and always would.
“And what of the prisoner?” he said. “Shall I send him to a jail? Do you think he is better suited for deprivation or pain?”
They meant to make him shatter, to methodically yank him apart until he faced death with the dull eyes and swayed back of an over-aged broodmare. You supposed to them it was meaningless — why should they show consideration or kindness to a man who would never show them the same? — but you were no warmonger, and that apathy did not cling to you yet. The prince was a beast born of sun, a wild, vicious creature, and if he really was slated to die, then you wanted him to meet his end as just that, nothing less. 
“Leave him be,” you said. “Treat him as well as you are able.”
“He would’ve killed me,” your husband said, a low note of warning in his voice. You shrank into the safety of your clothes, as if they were a shield against his vexation.
“But instead you will kill him,” you said. “So how does it matter? You said I could do as I like; well, this is what pleases me. Don’t prolong this anymore than necessary.”
You darted back into the palace without waiting to hear his answer, your jaw burning and your footsteps heavy against the mosaic floor as you ran all of the way to your chambers and slammed the door shut behind you.
For three days and three nights you did not leave your room, taking all your meals in seclusion, refusing any visitors that might attempt entry. You could not help it; the thought of seeing your husband or any of the soldiers made you want to weep — you! Who never wept, even as a baby! So you claimed that you were terribly unwell, that you could not stand for fear of collapse, and that managed to ward away your husband without incurring his wrath, even though it was only a temporary solution.
As the sun set on the fourth day, there was a knock on your door, and you were about to call out that you had no interest in conversation when someone hissed through the crack in the entrance: “Lady, I come not on your husband’s behalf but another’s. There is trouble, and you must attend to it.”
“What?” you said, scrambling to your feet, crouching by the entrance, pressing your ear to the wooden door without opening it. “Who is this? Who are you? Speak plainly, so that we may understand one another!”
There was a shuffling sound, and then an exhale. You worried with the collar of your shirt as you waited for them to continue, your arms pulled tightly around yourself, your brows furrowing together as you chewed on your lower lip.
“The prince of Kremnos,” they whispered. “He calls for you.”
“Are they mistreating him?” you said, straightening and flinging the door open. “The prince, are they — hello?”
The hallway was devoid of life. You peered down it, craning your neck this way and that, but it was placid, showing no signs of having been disturbed. Shutting the door slowly, you leaned against it, holding your head in your hands. Was this place driving you to insanity, then? And if it was, then why could you not have thought of something more pleasant than summons from a prisoner — prisoner!
Wasn’t it your duty to make sure your husband had held good on his word? The prisoner was yours, though the notion of ownership sent unpleasant shivers down your spine and didn’t feel quite right — perhaps a better way to think of it, then, was responsibility. He was your responsibility, and maybe the strange vision had been nothing more than a reminder of what you owed the man.
You waited until it was midnight, when you could be certain that your husband would not rise from his slumber at the sound of your activity, and then you donned a pair of slippers and a cloak, throwing the hood on and retreating into the billowing depths of the fabric, so that your face was obscured from prying eyes. Of course, there would not be very many of those, not at such a late hour, but you did not want to risk even one person recognizing you and reporting back to your husband, whose reaction to this escapade you could not foretell.
Although you were not so familiar with the palace’s layout, as you had never spent much time exploring it, most constructions of this nature followed a similar plan, and you had grown up in exactly such a grand, sweeping home, so you found the doorway to the cellar in record time. As the palace had no towers, the cellar was the only logical option for the keeping of such a dangerous prisoner, and you had no doubt in your mind that this was where you would find the prince, if he was still somewhere that you could find him.
The half-moon was your only witness as you fumbled with the lock, trying every key in your possession until one finally slotted into place and turned. Wincing as the door heaved open with a profound creak, you yanked it shut behind you quickly, without ceremony, lighting a small candle and using it to guide your way down the dark stairs, rushing so that you were out of sight in case someone came to investigate.
You did not know how long you walked for, but eventually the stairway ended, giving way to cool, damp earth. The must of uncut stone permeated the thick, heavy air, and the adjustment of your eyes to the surrounding blackness was slow, the pain of it only alleviated somewhat by the little candle’s valiant flame.
“Come to toss scraps at me?” The voice was rumbling and low; in spite of its weakness, you could hear a sneer in it, a disdain in the rough baritone. “You needn’t try again. Like I told you, I won’t eat your trash.”
“No,” you said. “I’ve brought nothing with me.”
There was a brief pause, and then: “You sound different than the others.”
“This tongue is foreign to me, as it is to you,” you said. “I cannot speak it in the same way as those who were born here. Verily I have been instructed in the art since I was but a child, for my father must have known in that manner of his what would eventually become of me, but I will never lay claim to it the way that a native of this empire would.”
“You’re his wife.” Chains clanked, the harsh drag of metal against stone reverberating in the cellar, and then you felt more than saw his looming countenance, filling what you had mistakenly believed upon arrival to be an empty room. Swinging your candle before you so that it was close to your heart, you gasped when it reflected in a pair of eyes glaring at you from mere paces away, the irises possessing a hollow and impossible brilliance in the way a pair of fading embers might. 
The chains now only encircled his left leg, binding him to the wall but leaving him otherwise free to move as he liked within the length of his confines. He had been stripped of armament and adornment alike, his mane of hair tangled and falling lank about his broad shoulders, yet for all of these injustices, you had no doubt in your mind that he was anything but a prince. He had a dignity to him, a hard-won pride to the straightness of his back and the firmness of his gaze; before you could chase it away, the thought came to you that there was far more intrinsic nobility to this man than there was even your husband.
“I suppose that I am,” you said.
“Have you come to gloat about your craven lord’s cowardly victory, then?” he said. The chains were pulled taut, so he could come no closer to you than he already was — you were sure of this, but you were still a slave to your instincts, which urged you farther and farther from him with every second. He watched you go with some measure of delight, like he was relishing in this power which you had inadvertently gifted him, and when you skittered to a stop, he huffed. “There is nothing to be proud of, and you look a fool for suggesting there might be.”
“I was just…” you trailed off, because it suddenly felt entirely absurd to suggest that you were inquiring after his wellbeing. What did it mean, the wellbeing of a doomed man? What reason would he have to believe your intentions? “What is your name?”
“My name?” he said with a brittle, incredulous laugh that rapidly descended into a cough. “Why? Do you wish to curse your husband with it? Does your language not have gods you can swear on?”
“You’re sickly,” you said, frowning and ignoring his jabs.
“You have torn me from the sun and chained me in this dingy room, and yet you have the gall to be surprised by that?” he said, scoffing. “You’re more of an idiot than that husband of yours.”
“I did no such thing!” you said. The defiance took you by surprise. You had forgotten what it felt like to defy someone, to disagree and resist their words, to feel alive with resentment and bad-temper. “I didn’t wish for this. I didn’t wish to keep you here anymore than you wished to be kept!”
“Is that so?” he said, and then he grinned at you, but it was less of a smile and more of a threat. “Then free me.”
“What?” you said.
“If you don’t want me, then free me,” he said.
“You’ll kill me if I do,” you said uneasily, shifting from foot to foot. 
“I give you my word that I will spare you,” he said, placing a solemn hand over his heart. 
“Not the others?” you said.
He did not respond, which in and of itself was a response. It was one you shouldn’t have liked as much as you did, but in truth the prospect of such a slaughter made your fingers twitch towards him. Only for a moment, and immediately, you shoved your hands behind your back, but it was too late — he had seen, and he raised his eyebrows at you in return.
“Well, anyways, it doesn’t matter,” you said hastily, hoping to distract him before he could comment on the treason. “I couldn’t free you even if I wanted to. Your chains are thrice-blessed. I didn’t know what that meant until recently, but now that I do, I understand why you have been kept without even a permanent guard.”
“Blessings,” he said, rolling his eyes. “Don’t tell me you put genuine stock into that drivel.”
“Perhaps the gods of other lands have forsaken their subjects, but this empire is known as the birthplace of every divine act, and so deities still sometimes glance upon its people and offer up their favor. Thrice-blessed chains are one such offering, for they are in fact more like contracts than they truly are chains,” you said. When he did not interrupt you with any snide remarks, you were emboldened to continue. “They can restrain anything, even a god, but this strength comes at a cost: they are conditional. If their captive can understand this condition and meet it, they will crumble into dust, but until then, the chains remain unbreakable.”
“What is it?” he said insistently, reaching out his hands like he was going to grab you and shake the answer out. He fell short, grasping at empty air, his muscles straining against the chains which, true to legend, did not falter. “This condition. Whatever it is, I will do it. You only need to tell me and I will do it!”
“I don’t know,” you said. His lip curled, and you shook your head frantically. “No, no, I’m telling you the truth, I really don’t know! Only the wielder and the gods he prayed to can know for certain. The conditions are decided arbitrarily, without trend or reason. It could be anything from singing a song to moving a mountain! At least, that’s what I’ve gathered from the little I’ve read on the topic.”
“The wielder — your husband, then? That’s easy enough. Bid him to tell you, and then relay to me his answer,” he said.
“Easy enough? Not in the slightest. He would just as soon do your bidding as he would mine,” you said. The prince squinted at you, and evidently he must’ve determined that you were serious, for he broke into that awful laugh again, the one that must’ve once been handsome and full-bodied but now was little more than a rattling plea for air. 
“You are pitiful,” he said. “I thought that you must be some great, fearsome empress, as wicked as your husband, but you are just a frightened mouse of a girl. You would not survive a day in Kremnos, you know. It would crush you.”
Duty. Obedience. Docility. They were branded onto you, swirling letters that you had unwittingly carved into yourself with every wedding vow you spoke, and you could not escape them any more than the prince could escape his chains. If only you could argue with him, tell him that once upon a time, you had been someone unrecognizable from who you were now…but already, you had tested their limits. Your tongue was frozen in your mouth, refusing to move in anything but accordance with your oaths, and so you only clasped your hands together.
“If you say it is so, then it really must be the case,” you said. “Farewell, prince of Kremnos.”
“Farewell,” he said, but it was clear he did not mean it. “Dear lady.”
“Don’t call me that,” you said, recognizing the provocation for what it was. “You are not my husband, nor do I wish for you to be.”
“Then what should I refer to you as?” he said. “Your excellency? Your grace? Your most exalted highness? Your holiness, the saint of the realm?”
“Here, I am only known as lady,” you said quietly. “But I bore a different name before. I cannot…I cannot say it anymore, but if you ever come to know of it by other means, then please call me as such.”
Morning brought with it a freezing palm pressed to your brow. It startled you to consciousness both because of its temperature and its temerity, for you could not fathom who had dared to enter your room without your permission, and while you were asleep, at that! In the haze of your sleep-addled mind, a rebuke rose to your lips, but then someone clicked their tongue and you fell silent even as you clambered to a more alert state.
“Your fever has finally broken, dear lady! You do not know how overjoyed I am to hear it,” your husband said, helping you into a sitting position, one hand cradling the back of your neck and the other holding up a glass. You blinked, trying to clear the fog from your vision, swallowing down the water he poured down your throat without objection.
“Fever?” you said.
“The ailment you have been suffering from,” he said. “I was told it was a fever of some sorts. I bore it quietly, the prospect of your malaise, but today I could not stop myself from checking on you. I had some dreams of playing the nurse, but here you are, entirely well! Such a miraculous recovery.”
His grandiose words masked suspicion with affection, but he did not make any further accusations, for just as you had sworn to heed him, so too had he promised to trust you. His vows had been made to a portrait of yours, as well as written in pig’s-blood and sent to you in a sealed envelope. You could recall them with perfect clarity, the way the stench of iron clung to the parchment as you unfolded it and rang your fingers over the lines, which were grouped in stanzas of three. 
Trust. Favor. Companionship.
You spent the entire day with your husband, although you had neither the desire nor the will for it. You hardly ever had the desire or the will to do anything, of course, not nowadays, but this was the worst of all, because your husband was not just a reminder but the very reason for everything which had happened to you. Still, you could not refuse, so you trotted along at his side, motionless as he showed you off to his officers, his advisors, and even, at one point, his cousin, who could not be less interested in you if he tried.
“Brother,” he said boredly, for indeed he and your husband were the only children of their respective fathers, and so were more like siblings than anything, “you have better things to be doing than showing off a woman who doesn’t bear showing off in the first place.”
“Are you saying that she is somehow deficient?” your husband said, swelling up with righteous indignation. Anyone else might’ve lost their head for the statement, especially given how blandly he had said it, but his cousin was above reproach, being the only person he really loved.
“I’m saying that she looks ill with misery,” his cousin said, and then he sighed, returning to his book. “I’m not so sure the lady has recovered from her illness. You ought to be more cautious with her, that’s all.”
His cousin was younger and handsomer than he, and as the two of you walked away, you thought that you would not have minded marrying him as much. Though perhaps this was a paradox — after all, if he had taken you in the manner that your husband had, then you would have hated him, too. It was your lot in life, then; always you would detest whoever you wed, whoever stole your freedom in that way and bound you to them with the cruel ropes of matrimony.
The hall where you took your dinner was like an enormous cavern, so large that you felt like your voice might echo if you spoke. You and your husband were the only ones in it, which heightened the effect, and every clank of his silverware against his porcelain dishes resounded in your ears like discordant bells.
“My prisoner,” you said after a long time had passed wherein the two of you discussed nothing. Your voice was dry with disuse, and you pushed the food on your plate around without attempting to eat, although it was all appetizing and you were certainly hungry.
“What?” your husband said, covering his mouth with his hand as he chewed.
“My prisoner,” you said, clearing your throat but keeping your gaze trained firmly on your food. “The prince of Kremnos. Is he well?”
“You’re asking after his health?” your husband said with a chuckle. When you did not laugh or otherwise indicate that you were joking, he frowned at you. “You needn’t fret. As you requested, I am treating him as well as I am able. Far better than he deserves.”
The image of the prince, chained and kept in darkness, the only sound his persistent cough and unsteady breathing, given scraps for sustenance and mice for company, flashed across your mind. 
“I wish to see him,” you said. There was a warning in the back of your head — duty, obedience, docility — but you ignored it as best as you could, stabbing oversharp fingernails into your thighs, hard enough to draw blood and distract you from the dangerous line you tread. “My lord, I wish to see the prince and ensure that he is alright with my own eyes.”
At this your husband did not even pretend to humor you. He burst into a raucous fit of cackles, his fork and knife clattering to the table, his eyes watering at the corners. You waited for him to stop, picking your own cutlery up in vain before setting it down and folding your hands in your lap.
“No,” he said. “I am afraid that I cannot allow that, dear lady.”
“You cannot—” you began, but it was too much, you had stepped over that precarious boundary, and now you were frozen. Gulping, you counted to five before continuing. “He is mine. He is mine, you said it yourself, so why — can’t — I — see — him?”
Each word dug into you like gravel, and you knew that you had lost this argument before you could even attempt to have it. How could you ever win? When you had sworn thrice over that you would be tractable, how could you ever try to be anything else? Your intentions did not matter as much as the execution, not to the number three and the power it lent this empire.
“How obstinate,” your husband said, appraising you with a new eye. “I am sorry, dear lady, but as my cousin said, you are still weak. It will do you no good to be faced with such a base creature. You can see him again on the day of his execution.”
“Yes,” you said through gritted teeth, which was not as much as you wanted to do but was as much as you could, at present, manage. “Might I be excused?”
“Excused? You haven’t eaten anything,” he said, pointing at your plate. True to his word, it was untouched, and you picked it up, holding it close to your chest as you stood. 
“My stomach is protesting,” you said. “I will take it to my room and eat it later. If it pleases you.”
“Very well,” he said, waving at you. “I shall pray for your health, dear lady. Sleep as late as you’d like tomorrow, but once you are awake, I implore you to join me in my preparations. There is a grand celebration in the afternoon, as a marker of our victory against Kremnos, and I have been summoned to speak; if you could muster some words as well, it might hearten the people and warm them to you.”
“Yes, my lord,” you said. “I shall think of something.”
“See to it that you do,” he said, watching you with an unreadable expression on his face as you left, your footsteps growing faster and faster until you were all but racing to your room, your head spinning and palms clammy like you had gotten away with some great crime. 
Tonight, there were no strange voices beckoning you, but that did not stop you from staying awake far past the moon’s rise, waiting until it hung over the clocktower before picking your way back to the cellar, your heart pounding as you crept back down those dark, endless stairs, an actual lantern in one hand and your plate in the other.
The prince was still there. You had half-expected him to have disappeared, to have turned out to be some figment of your imagination, but he was leaning against the wall, his arms folded over his chest and his lips pursed as he watched the light of your lantern approach. When he realized it was you, his eyes narrowed, and he tucked his chin to his chest in what you could only assume was a stubborn display of the meager strength he had left.
“I brought food for you,” you said, setting the lantern on the last stair and presenting the plate before you. “Please eat it.”
“What do you think I am?” he said. “Some kind of a dog, such that I am eager for  you to foist your refuse on me? Hardly. Take it and leave me at once.”
“You’ll waste away,” you said. “You are only doing yourself a disservice! This is my own dinner, which I have gone without so that I could bring it to you. Does that make it easier to stomach?”
“Shall I sit on the floor, then, and eat it with my hands?” he said with a disparaging smile. “Will that amuse you? Is that why you’ve come? I heard your husband, you know. ‘Do what you’d like with him now that he is yours.’ How joyless your life must be, to think that this is what you entertain yourself with!”
“It is joyless,” you bit back, and your eyes widened at the freedom of the declaration. “It is! But you are not my — you are not some kind of amusement, I resent that you — I even spoke against my husband for you, and you say that! Fine, then. Starve, you thoughtless simpleton! Starve and die for all the good it’ll do me!”
You turned on your heel and stomped towards the stairs with the graceless irascibility of a child, not even sparing a glance over your shoulder at the prince. He was quiet, but you knew from the heavy weight of his stare on your back that there was something like turmoil brewing in his mind, a turmoil which weakened your resolve with every step you took away from him.
It was to your credit that you made it all of the way to where the lantern was sitting before you wavered, your stride shortening until you halted in place. Scrunching up your face, wondering when you had developed this love for punishment, for strife and conflict, you allowed your shoulders to sag in acceptance.
“Dispose of this before anyone comes to see you,” you said, shoving the plate into his hands before he could protest. “I suppose it matters little how you do it, but you must, or else I will be convicted of treason, and where will that leave us? Imprisoned side by side and left to rot together.”
He did not respond until you were almost out of earshot entirely, and then he coughed. You could not tell whether it was to capture your attention or to clear his voice of any residual hesitance; regardless, he accomplished both objectives, as you lingered for a moment longer than you would’ve.
“Ten,” he said. “That’s how many times I could’ve killed you in the time you’ve been here. But I—”
You continued walking before you could hear the rest of it.
You woke up the next day in better spirits than you had in some time, and in fact when a servant announced that you had a visitor, you opened the door with a new vigor. Upon realizing that the man in front of you was not your husband but rather his cousin, you thought that you might die from the glee of it all. Taking his arm, you allowed him to escort you to where the imperial contingent was setting up for the festival, at a grand stage which took up most of the square and was already laden with visitors at its base.
“It is a relief to see you recovering so well,” your husband’s cousin said. “The rumors in the palace are that you’ve contracted some illness of the chronic variety; in truth I believed them, especially after our meeting yesterday, but today I see that you have been revitalized. Did you rest well last night, then? I heard that you did not eat your dinner, but you must’ve taken it in your room, yes?”
You had done neither of those things, and his questioning did make you pause. What was the cause of your good mood? You had gone to sleep for only a short time, without much of anything in your stomach, and your situation had not improved any, so why did you feel, even if only marginally, as if you were something like yourself again?
“I suppose it must be something like love,” he mused, without waiting for your answer. 
“Ah, pardon?” you said, startled from the winding turns and byways of your thoughts at the strange declaration.
“To think that even a day in your husband’s presence has cured you to such an extent,” he explained. “Surely it is love? I cannot think of any other name for it…but I apologize! It is not my place to inquire, nor to speculate. I trust you will not tell my cousin about this?”
He had, in the taken-aback blink of your eyes and the pinch of your brow, found what he was seeking: a demure shyness which he could only comprehend as a lack of affection. You knew, then, that you had passed the test of the man, who had not believed any more than your husband that you were truly ill.
“I will take your leave,” he said, and then his palm clamped down on your shoulder. “But I trust you know this: however much you may love your husband, he is a difficult man to be loved by in return. If ever you are in search of solace…there are places you may turn to, dear lady.”
“What did he say to you?” your husband said, appearing at your side with his expression arranged into something like a frown. “I could not hear. Was he bothering you? I am sorry if he was. He has always been headstrong.”
“He was not bothering me,” you said, incapable of lying to your husband with any great skill but remaining certain that it was absolutely imperative you did not divulge his cousin’s secrets to him. “We spoke as family members might.”
If he recognized your evasive language, he did not comment on it. Instead, he stroked his chin in thought, and then he directed his attention towards the stage, where one of his generals was beckoning him — and, by extension, you.
The sun hung high in the sky as you ascended to the podium, though its rays did not dare touch you, disguised in your husband’s shadow as you were. Your vows tied more than your tongue, after all; your entire being, everything but your heart and your mind, were trained and twisted into the picture of submission, and soon those, too, would fall, leaving you a husk which could do nothing but nod and follow along.
Your husband did not need to start with any address. His mere presence was enough to silence the gathered empire, every single onlooker leaning towards the stage in eager anticipation of his words. From your vantage point, it was like the swell of a tide, crushing and suffocating, inescapable in its overwhelming intensity, but where you withdrew, your husband brightened at the weight, lifting his head and squaring his shoulders.
“Mydeimos,” he said, over-enunciating every syllable. The word, unfamiliar and foreign to your ears, had a rhythmic, marching cadence, more suited to a battle-cry than a formal declaration, and it seemed you were not alone in your thinking, for it had all the effect of one on the crowd.
A heckling clamor burst from them, the individual words indecipherable but for brief snippets. Demon. Monster. Warmonger. Kill. Curse. Blood. Kill. Kill. Kill! Your husband waited for them to quiet of their own volition, and only then did he venture to continue, this time with a wide, beaming grin.
“Mydeimos has fallen. The prince of terrors is no more!” he shouted, raising his fist in the air to thunderous applause. “Without him to lead the army, Kremnos will surely follow suit. Their lands will be ours within the year, of this much I assure you! Our empire will soon be the most prosperous in all the world. Even the great lands of the Southern Sea will pale in comparison!”
Your heart twinged at the mention of the Southern Sea. You could envision it even now, the streaks of salt left on the cliffs where the water lapped at them, the ripples in the placid blue where the balmy winds skimmed along the surface, the moon-white sand as it clung to the crevices of your feet and hands.
When you were younger, your father would take you on his boat and dip his fingers into it, urging you to do the same. You would ask him why and he would answer, always with a laugh or a smile: of all the jewels in my treasury, my darling, the Southern Sea is the second-loveliest. Then you would ask him which could be the first, if even the sea was not its equal, and he’d press his damp hands to your cheeks and kiss your hair and say you, my darling, you and only you.
“What a horrible thing he was,” your husband said. “Mydeimos. That wretched excuse of a man…the world is all the better now that he is locked away. I watched him — watched him, good citizens, with my own eyes — tear out a man’s heart with naught but his nails and teeth! Even now I can imagine it…the tips of his canines dark with pierced flesh…bits of entrails coating his fingers…the heart still beating in his palms…he looked the proper part of a devil, and I was certain that I had died and found damnation!
“But as I said, he is no more. Our army prevailed, as we always have, and as we always will; I made Mydeimos beg for mercy with my sword at his throat and my foot upon his inhuman heart, and then I dragged him back so that all of you could see what he has been relegated to — a chained puppy, given to my dear lady as a pet and kept as a servant until the day of his execution.
“For the surest way to kill a Kremnoan is to destroy their pride, and the prince of terrors has more pride than most, so we must endeavor to strip him of it, systematically and fastidiously, until even a child can cut him down!”
Your husband concluded his speech and pulled you forward simultaneously, with a great flourish which invited praise and drew attention to you both. You swallowed, your mind racing at breakneck speed, far too quickly for you to make any sense of the things you were saying until you were saying them.
“I have not seen the prince of Kremnos — Mydeimos — since the day that he was brought to me,” you said. The applause that had begun faded as soon as the soft words sparkled into existence, and the many eyes of the audience blurred together until you could pretend like you were alone, like you were speaking to nothing but small, bright stones reflecting your own sentiments. “But as my lord husband said, he was proud. I feel as though I have never seen a man prouder. Even after his loss, he remained proud. Even with nothing else left, he clung to that pride, that assurance…I remember thinking to myself that it was, in its own way, admirable. That he was admirable.”
Your husband’s arm around your waist grew tighter with unspoken warning, though it needn’t have. You had said all that you wanted, all that you could, and now there was nothing left but the judgement of the collective.
“Lady!” someone shouted, the singular soul brave enough to speak. She was a woman — you wondered if this was what bolstered her confidence, a perceived kinship between the two of you for that fact alone. “Do you fear the prince?”
“No,” you said, and although you had meant it only as a vague and empty placation, you were surprised to find that it rang true. You were not afraid of him, and it wasn’t his chains or his infirmity which caused this emotion to surge in you; rather, it was what he had told you last night, that declaration he had made with the utmost of seriousness, which you had not even allowed him to complete. “I am not. He cannot harm me.”
You knew your words would be interpreted as faith in your husband and the empire, and furthermore that this misinterpretation would curry favor with your subjects and your lord alike, so you did nothing to correct it. Yet you would know, and would hold close to your heart the knowing, that it was not your husband who you held faith in: it was Mydeimos, the prince of Kremnos, who might’ve killed you ten times over but had instead let you live.
“You have much to improve in terms of your orating,” your husband said coldly as the three of you — him, his cousin, and yourself — returned to the palace.
“I thought her speech was excellent,” his cousin said, shooting you a sly smile behind his back. “Very concise, and of a good style. It’s a gift to be able to convey meaning so succinctly. You ought to nurture it.”
“She certainly conveyed a meaning,” your husband said. “It remains to be said what value that meaning truly holds.”
“Is that for you to decide? Ah, brother, don’t be a curmudgeon, I am only teasing you! You spent so much of our childhood poking fun at me, so how can you fault me for paying you back in kind?” his cousin said.
“You need some lessons in respect,” your husband said, but without any real bite behind it. His cousin snickered before sobering, shifting his weight toward you.
“Will you take your dinner in your chambers again, lady?” he said. You nodded.
“If it does not offend,” you said. 
“Do as you please,” your husband said. “Though I expect you’ll do that anyways, sworn to me or not. Isn’t that right, dear lady?”
You couldn’t think of any response which would be satisfactory, so you said nothing, allowing the two of them to escort you to your room, where you waited with bated breath until the night fell and you could return to the cellar.
The entire way down the stairs, you turned the name over in your mind, polishing it in the way waves polished driftwood, battering it with incessant worry until it shone, uncanny and unrecognizable. Mydeimos. Mydeimos. Mydeimos. The prince of terrors. The man who had torn a heart out with his teeth. What did it say of you, that you were making your way to exactly such a knave? With trepidation, of course, but what did it say that you were still doing it anyways? Perhaps very much, or perhaps very little.
“There is an odd pattern to your footsteps,” he said before you could even greet him. He stood as he always did, prepared for a battle that he would never again see. “Or perhaps it is your breathing, or something else entirely.”
“What do you mean?” you said, putting your lantern and the dinner down in the space between you both. “I walk and breathe as I always have, as others do.”
“I know you,” he said, disgust mingling with the barest traces of awe in his tone. “The door to this cellar opens frequently. All manner of men come to visit me, to mock me from their places at the bottom of the stairs, lambasting me from the safety of their distance. I recognize few, and  I remember fewer — nor do I have any great desire to — but when it is you, I know. From your very step, from the very creak of the door, I know. I cannot understand how or why, but I know.”
“My husband told me your name,” you said after a pause, when it became clear he was not expecting a reaction from you. Motioning towards the food in a gesture you hoped he took to kindly, you continued: “I did not ask him, but he mentioned it in passing, so naturally now I know it.”
“I see,” he said, and although his gaze flicked towards the ground, he did not move. You remembered, then, what else your husband had said in that speech of his, the vainglorious words echoing in your ears: for the surest way to kill a Kremnoan is to destroy their pride, and the prince of terrors has more pride than most, so we must endeavor to strip him of it, systematically and fastidiously, until even a child can cut him down!
“Mydeimos,” you said, and then you sat on the floor, which was made of a cold stone that shot chills down the backs of your legs. Resting your elbows atop your thighs and your chin in your hands, you blinked up at him. “That is what he called you. ‘The prince of terrors.’”
“How unimaginative,” he said, and you suppressed a shudder at his glare, which was baleful and acute as it settled upon you. “My-deimos. Many-terrors. Yes, that is my name, though that ridiculous nickname is of his own invention. The Kremnoans would laugh if they heard it.”
“He said that he watched you tear out a man’s heart with your nails,” you said, and then you glanced at his lips, simultaneously and unconsciously wetting your own with the tip of your tongue. “And your teeth.”
He bared those very teeth, white and glinting, in a barking laugh — as much an expression of warning as it was humor. “My teeth! Your husband is one for fiction.”
“And — and he spoke of how he defeated you,” you said. At this, anything resembling mirth vanished from Mydeimos, and he grew curiously immobile — you almost thought that you had frightened him into the grips of memory, but then you realized that he was not frozen as much as he was waiting.
“Did he?” he said. “And what did your husband say of my defeat, dear lady?”
“He  made you beg for mercy with his sword at your throat and his foot upon your inhuman — upon your heart,” you said, correcting yourself for the slip of the tongue, finding no merit in telling him about that particular detail. “And then he dragged you back here.”
The longer Mydeimos remained silent, the shallower your breaths became, a cold fist forming around your heart and squeezing, the muscles in your arms and legs contracting, protesting their inactivity. You needed to run. If you were wiser, if you had anything resembling self-preservation, you would run, would flee and hope that you were fast enough to make it to the stairs before he pounced. 
You supposed you lacked both wisdom and self-preservation in spades, for you remained on the floor, peering up at him and praying that he could not read your mind, could not comprehend the depths of your thoughts.
“So that is his story,” he said. “I should’ve known he wouldn’t tell his people the truth.”
“He made it up,” you said rhetorically.
“You don’t sound surprised,” he noted.
“It is not — it is not —” You gnawed on the inside of your cheek, trying to come up with some way to circumvent your wedding vows, some way you could impress upon him what you were trying to say. “When we were wed, it was said that I loved him madly and completely, that I bawled to my father until he allowed me to come here.”
“Then it is not his first time dabbling in such falsehoods,” Mydeimos completed. When you nodded, he snorted. “You cannot speak ill of him, can you? Is it magic?”
“In the way of this land,” you said with a shrug.
“What an emperor,” he said. “So he can neither bed his wife nor win his battles without the use of tricks and obfuscation? Where I come from, they have a word for those like that, but as it is foul, I will not trouble you with hearing it.”
“What do you mean?” you said. “Ah, not by the foul word…that is, what tricks do you refer to? If the story he told is inaccurate, then how did he really defeat you? For surely he must have, or else you would not be here.”
“He did not defeat me,” he said. “Believe it or not, but that is the truth.”
“How?” you pressed, for you had already eschewed wisdom once and did not mind doing so again.
For a moment, it was as if the sun shone down upon him again. You saw him as he was on the day he met you, or perhaps even before — the prince of Kremnos, sleek and powerful and indomitable, red marks blooming in place of the scars he would never receive, eyes ablaze in his hollow face, hair as wild and untamed as his spirit.
“He surrendered,” Mydeimos said, scowling. “Our numbers were smaller, but Kremnoans have never cared for things like odds. We were winning, indubitably we were winning, and your husband knew it as well as we did. They attacked us in our own territory, fought us with our own weapons…how could we have lost? We would’ve wiped them out, but your husband and his men raised their white flags, and so we ceased to attack them.
“I went to parley with them, to negotiate the terms of their surrender. In a show of goodwill, I agreed to your husband’s request to come unaccompanied. His men were exhausted, and I found it honorable that he was putting their wellbeing first, so I ignored my instincts and the warnings of my advisors, going forth alone, leaving my armor and weapons as I was instructed to.
“That was my mistake. I should never have expected honor from a serpent, whose nature it is to bite. The surrender was a ploy; I was met by hordes of guards, each with a spear pointed at my heart. Even then, I fought. Do not think I met my end willingly, dear lady — I fought and killed as many men as he threw at me. I could’ve killed them all, I would’ve killed them all, but right as I was about to, he threw these chains at me from the corner where he hid. It should not have worked, his aim and the strength behind it were both lacking, but it was as if the metal had a mind of its own, and before I knew it I was bound.”
“As I told you, they are thrice-blessed,” you said. “Divine. They long to fulfill their purpose, and will do anything to that end. If it defies the laws of nature, well, what are those laws compared to the ones who wrote them? Those men were only a distraction. Once my husband received these chains, there was nothing which could’ve changed your fate.”
“What sort of a god favors a man who feigns surrender?” Mydeimos said. “What kind of deity loves perfidy?”
“I have often asked myself the same questions,” you admitted, half-expecting yourself to be unable and closing your eyes in relief when you weren't. “Why is it that he is the one they champion? What justice is there in that? He must have been a saint in his past life, to be treated as he is. A saint, or a martyr, or something like that. Something wonderful to the point of deserving so many miracles in this next iteration of his.”
You chose your speech carefully, injecting as much resentment into it as was needed to convey to the prince what you really meant, but not enough that you seized up into inaction. Not enough that you strained against the hold that your vows held over you.
You heard him exhale, and at this, you allowed your eyes to flutter open once more, peeking up at him and immediately wishing you hadn’t.
Whatever had briefly rallied in him, whatever fervor and fire he had briefly regained…it was gone. It was gone, leaving him fractured and bereft, forlorn instead of fearsome, prisoner instead of prince. Your husband had done that to him. Your husband had destroyed him, as he had destroyed you, and it was this reflection of your own fate which tore at you the most.
Breaking off a piece of bread, you dipped it in the long-cooled sauce pooled in the corner of the plate, and, without a word, held it out to him. He eyed it suspiciously, and for a moment you thought he might refuse it. The beginnings of an argument bubbled to the surface, but it never had the chance to take shape — before your lips could so much as part, he knelt across from you and took your proffered hand by the wrist.
Holding it in place, his thumb digging into your pulse like a reminder that he didn’t want this, didn’t want to accept your help, he used his free hand to swipe the bread from your palm. Then, his brows heavy, low over his eyes with mistrust and reluctance, he shoved it into his mouth and ate it.
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taglist (comment/send an ask to be added): @mikashisus @ivana013-blog @mizukiqr @shehrazadekey @simp-simp-no-mi @reapersan @casualgalaxystrawberry @secretive3amramenmaker [if your tag does not show up in grey, that means tumblr had an issue with it, sorry! sometimes it does that sadly]
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#been waiting to have a moment just to read this :> excited hehe#cora rb: hsr#you 🤝 me ; not knowing much about amphoreus ahaha i have not played it yet either outside of seeing phainon’s entrance#i am immediately intrigued omg the statue and reader lowkey not even liking her husband???#calling his pride worthless and juvenile omg i love seeing through reader’s perspective#‘dotting the dark cobblestones like a cluster of stars’ absolutely beautiful line your writing is incredible#i love the way you write it truly feels like a novel or a fairytale written long ago ; like i’m reading the old folklore of another land#the comparison to a snake is absolutely stunning too ; actually lowk reminds me of oliver HAHAHA sorry that’s my wandering mind#yo what kinda gift is this (playful) (i’m aware it’s a development of the story dw HAHA i love how this is going and how you introduce plot#points)#thinking about mydei tied up did smth to me SORRY sorry irrelevant and inappropriate LAHDK he is so hot tho#YOUR BACKWARDS LAND HELLO I WILL MURDER HIM (playful and lighthearted but also a testament to the emotions in me your writing evokes)#‘scratched like bile’ same reader ohmygod u and i can start a murder this man alliance#‘a beast born of sun’ wow this is so beautiful. love the way you weave words together#reader having the foresight to put a hood on ; i love her intelligence and forethought. idk i just really love reader in this ahaha she#feels like a real character which i love a lot personally!!! i love her depth ; OKAY HELLO I got called away i hath come back to finish#reading!! sorry for the delay!! ; 'I will never lay claim to it the way that a native of this empire would' again so beautifully written#also mood as someone who has like never lived in the country they're from :')) waugh#'a hollow and impossible brilliance in the way a pair of fading embers' this is absolutely stunning too ; the dignity and hard-won pride#u describe i really really love this about him too and i love your characterization of him in this sense#'Does your language not have gods you can swear on?' WHEWWW WHAT A LINE (compliment)#'n truth the prospect of such a slaughter made your fingers twitch towards him' YEAHHH GIRL LET HIM KILL YOUR HUSBAND WOOO (playful) HAHA#I'M ON TEAM MYDEI BABEY ; i love the lore building with the thrice blessed chains very very cool#'the one that must’ve once been handsome and full-bodied but now was little more than a rattling plea for air' another absolutely beautiful#line ; 'swirling letters that you had unwittingly carved into yourself with every wedding vow you spoke' I LOVEEE this#'Ten. That’s how many times I could’ve killed you in the time you’ve been here' AND THEN SHE WALKED AWAY HAHA I WAS LAUGHING#PLEASE the cousin thinking it's HIS LOVE ohmygod. ; awee reader's father loved her :'))) i love that for her ; OHMYGODDD MYDEI KNOWING#READER?? i LOVE a i have known you trope ohmygodd i love this#'So he can neither bed his wife nor win his battles without the use of tricks and obfuscation?' HAHA YEAHH GET HIMM
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werederg · 1 year ago
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Bloodborne DND time babey!
Today’s Topic: NPC spotlight!
Yakov the Feathered!
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This is him. My boy, my man. Yakov the Feathered!
Yakov is my take on the OG hunter of hunters. The exact quote from the gear is “The first Hunter of Hunters came from a foreign land, and gave the dead a virtuous native funeral ritual, rather than impose a blasphemous Yharnam burial service upon them.” So obviously Yakov comes from a foreign land, and for the native funeral ritual I have taken inspiration from the burial practices of Zoroastrianism, where a body is left out in the open for animals to feed on and for nature to reclaim. I chose this partially because it was one of my first thoughts and also because I think it adds to the horror if Yakov casually hangs out around rotting corpses being picked on by birds.
In the physical world of Yharnam, Yakov will first appear in the place Eileen normally does. He is notably different in temperament than Eileen. Eileen is somewhat kind and encouraging to the hunter when they find her, seeming understanding and sympathetic, giving helpful items to the hunter. Yakov by contrast is dismissive and standoffish. The first line of dialogue I have for him is:
“Fly away from my perch, little hatchlings. You’re much too wet behind the ears to be my prey quite yet.”
I kinda leaned into the whole bird themeing because this would be the man who made the damn bird costumes so I feel like it would be a thing for him. I like this as intro dialogue because it is dismissive of the players but it also prompts questions from the players about what exactly he means.
Yakov has so much lore and kinda complicated motivations, he’s my second oldest NPC for this setting but definitely the one I’ve worked on the most. So backstory for him!
Despite what the name might imply Yakov does not have a Russian accent mostly because I can’t do one consistently anymore. He has a British accent (which I’ve been practicing lmao) which is short hand in the setting for someone who is either from Yharnam or has been there long enough to pick up the native accent.
Yakov has been in Yharnam since before the hunt and the church was in full power. He met a woman who was traveling in his homeland and fell in love with her and decided to move to Yharnam to be with her. Her name is Bonnie.
Yakov lived in Yharnam with Bonnie through the start of the scourge, before Old Yharnam burned down, when the church was still trying to keep everything that was happening a secret. Both Yakov and Bonnie were aware something not quite right was going on, especially once the hunt officially started after the burning of Old Yharnam. Yakov was very distrustful of the church at the time especially as they seemed to know more than they let on about the scourge.
At some point Bonnie becomes pregnant and Yakov begins to think that perhaps Yharnam is not the place to raise a child, but Bonnie scolds him for the idea that he would abandon the people of Yharnam when they are in need of help. Yakov is an honorable man who believes in helping those in need. The night they have an argument about this however, Bonnie goes for a walk to clear her head and never comes back. It is not clear what happens to her.
Yakov is devastated, but he knows he needs to be the person his wife believed he was, someone who would help the people of Yharnam even if the people didn’t yet understand that it might be their very own church putting them in danger, as Yakov believes.
Yakov then joins the hunters workshop to be better equipped and have more access to investigate the inner workings of Yharnam and the healing church. He is brought out of his grief by some of the kinship he finds with other hunters, many of whom also with the best of intentions to help the people of Yharnam.
I’ll probably add more hunters that Yakov knew back then in the future but the main important one is Ahmed. Yakov and Ahmed are very close during their time as hunters. It is a deeply homoerotic relationship, but not explicitly homosexual as Yakov is still mourning his wife.
Ahmed is also a foreigner. His people are normally pacifists except for in extreme circumstances, which Ahmed believed Yharnam was in.
They hunt for a period of time, Ahmed not quite knowing about Yakov’s investigation into the church as Yakov worries it will put people in danger if they know about him opposing the church. Eventually, Ahmed discovers the old hunters DLC, a place where hunters seem to have lost their minds, trapped in a constant cycle of mindless violence. Ahmed is terrified that this is a fate that will befall him and that it will disgrace his family and ancestors for him to become a mindless killer. Ahmed makes Yakov promise that Yakov will not let Ahmed end up in that nightmare and they go about trying to understand what it is in the first place.
They together with some of their other hunter friends come to understand the phenomenon of “blood drunk hunters” and as time passes, one by one all of the hunters that Yakov knows start to show signs of going blood drunk, some slowly some quickly, eventually they all fall and are all claimed by the nightmare, including Ahmed. Yakov is powerless to stop them.
But after these losses, and the way the city has been degrading over time, Yakov decides that the people of Yharnam can not be saved. The beasthood can not be prevented or cured and things just see to be getting worse and Yakov has lost every one he has ever cared about in the city.
He sets his sights on blood drunk hunters, determined to prevent any more of his siblings in arms being claimed by the nightmare. He can’t keep his promise to Ahmed, but he can do what he can to stop any more hunters from hurting people and becoming lost in a waking nightmare.
This is how Yakov becomes the first hunter of hunters.
He is, by the time the players meet him, a very sad man. He has shut himself off from caring about anyone else because of everything he’s lost and has dedicated himself to his work of watching hunters, tracking signs of blood drunkenness, and taking them out before they can hurt anyone or be claimed by the nightmare. He works with other hunters who he has brought into the same cause but he remains distant from them.
I’m toying with the idea that there is something special about the blades of mercy that untethers hunters from the dream, because otherwise why would they not just reawaken in the dream, the other option is that once hunters become fully blood drunk their connection to the dream is automatically severed and there is a short window of time to kill them before they are claimed by the nightmare. I’m not sure yet.
There are two other hunters of hunters that Yakov collaborates with so far for the game. And they go by bird themed code names. Both because I think that’s fun and because I think that it would make sense that the church would not condone the work these hunters do and if the church knows your full name they can destroy your contract, which presumably is what gives you access to the hunters dream, an act that would basically kill you in the long term.
The two other hunters of hunters will come up in later NPC posts, shorter ones lmao.
Not sure if this is everything for Yakov, so if you have any questions or thoughts please let me know! Yakov is one of my fav NPC’s so far and I’d love to talk about him.
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buggachat · 1 year ago
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adrien never went to public school / adrienette have never met AU where Ladynoir are dating but Marinette has beef with Adrien Agreste™ on twitter, spurred by her interest in the fashion industry and her friendship with Mylene. ads are all over the place of Adrien promoting products like air in a bottle and NFTs and just generally so many products that are extremely poor taste/bad for the environment. Marinette tweets about beauty standards in the industry and all the shit Gabriel brand does to the environment and how Adrien Agreste perfectly encapsulates it all.
Adrien, of course, never responds to any of her tweets. her tweets are just white noise in the background. she is nowhere near on his level. one day Marinette tweets out something akin to "if I saw Adrien Agreste irl i'd punch him in the face" and her twitter gets banned for Threats of Violence, Alya draws attention to the injustice of it via the Ladyblog and suddenly "I want to punch Adrien Agreste in the face [gets banned]" becomes a bit of a meme. NOW people know who Marinette is and are listening to what she's saying (on her new account or whatever). Chat Noir also tweets that he wants to punch Adrien in the face
A hashtag trends. Marinette caves and starts tweeting about the scandals of the industry on her Ladybug twitter too. Adrien's twitter and instagram comments are flooded with both threats to punch him but also just generally critical comments like "nice pic and all but are you not going to address the sweatshop allegations?". Adrien still does not address it. At most he turns comments off. Marinette is gnawing at the wood of her desk.
Then a Ladybug and Chat Noir identity reveal happens.
Marinette is stunned. Absolutely mouth agape. Cannot form words. Chat Noi— NO, ADRIEN— ADRIEN FUCKING AGRESTE looks at her and is like "oh ha :) .... Marinette Dupain-Cheng, right? You're the girl who wanted to punch me hahaha"
after recovering from her world being shattered, she's like...... "hahaha...... um............... yeah...... uh..... so you... DO know who i am. and you're just. ignoring it then. hahaha... ok... thats....... fine..... anyway..... u-uh...... im not... gonna actually punch you. but. um. k-kitty do you um. maybe want to stop promoting deforestation and all that"
he's like "I don't"
she's like. "yes you do. literally in your newest ad you said to the camera 'who needs trees when bottled air is the way of the future'. like did you really read that line out loud and not see a problem with it"
"yeah, that wasn't me"
"what are you talking abou—"
"it's deepfaked"
"..... what"
"all of my ads in the past few years are deepfakes. I complained too much so my father fired me. turns out that i signed away all rights to my face and voice to him when I was 13 or something. he can just use my face and voice and name however he wants. he generates ads. i dont even have access to the 'Adrien Agreste' twitter or insta accounts. sometimes he makes me do runways but beyond that I'm not involved in all."
"... ... ... ... ... what"
"yeah haha... :") im sorry. i wish i could help you more. but he never listens to me. i don't like it either, i.... i've asked him to stop sooo many times. but he never listens to me. i hate seeing my face used without my consent but haha.... i don't... have any rights here so. sorry. i really wish i could help more"
and now marinette hates "Adrien Agreste"™ ads/posts EVEN MORE and is threatening to kill Gabriel Agreste himself. all while kissing the real adrien agreste silly
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chuulyssa · 3 months ago
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there’s glitter on the floor after the party !
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teaser it’s your birthday tonight, but do they remember, or care? pair gojo, nanami, geto, toji, sukuna x reader cw angst, just pure torture™, not proofread !
a/n it’s my birthday on 28th wooohoooo ! i wanted to be a sad girl tho *lana intensifies* let’s hope my parents take some notes and NOT do this
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GOJO
for someone who liked cakes, sweets and celebrations so much, you didn’t think it would take this long for satoru to realize what day it was. you didn’t want to remind him either; he should remember it on his own, shouldn’t he? moreover, you had hated the look on his face when you reminded him of the anniversary date the two of you had planned together. he had panicked so hard and begun checking his notes and calendars, it was a pathetic sight, honestly.
“what?” his face had fallen immediately.
“don’t you remember?”
“uh, sweets, what exactly am i supposed to remember?” he had said.
he was just busy. but you had agreed upon this when you began dating him. not everyone was the strongest sorcerer in the world, not everyone had the number of things to do that he did.
“no, it’s fine.”
“you sure?” he had asked.
“yeah, it’s nothing, really.”
but you were quite sure he hadn’t forgotten. not this time. because you had checked in on his calendar a week before this, and today was marked rightly “her birthday” with a shit ton of emojis. so what was taking so long? maybe he was planning a surprise party? whatever it was, you didn’t think the prank needed to be dragged on for so long. since he remembered it, he ought to come out and celebrate already. and if he didn’t, well, whatever. you had many other birthdays to celebrate.
not when you saw that the party he kept was for someone else, some other girl, no
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NANAMI
you’d been waiting for hours at this point. and it was nanami, the kento nanami. kento was never late, how could he be? if there was something he always relied on it was his ability to tell the time, whether it was his refusal to work overtime or his arrival on your dates before you.
so where was he now? he had hurried off in the morning before you had gotten a word out.
“i’m terribly sorry, sweetheart, i have to leave early today,” he had planted a quick kiss on your forehead.
“okay, okay,” you had blinked in confusion at his hurry. “where are you going though?”
“i have decided something.”
“decided what?”
he’d sighed cryptically. what was he hiding?
“it’s best if you didn’t know.”
“excuse me?”
he’d shaken his head and just… left? he hadn’t even wished you, not the night before, not the morning after. and just what had he decided? you were hurt, of course you were. where was he going in such a hurry? you had felt he had been growing distant from you for long now. but it did not make the pain of being left alone on your fucking birthday any better. but what could you do either way now? you had many other birthdays to celebrate.
not when you saw that he had returned to his sorcerer status, and completely abandoned all the plans the two of you had made for your future, no
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GETO
he was too in love with his cult to notice, of course he was. suguru dumbass geto. of course it was his cult’s birthday today, who were you even? when he had first told you, to prevent yourself from crashing the fuck out, you had tried to shut up.
“oh.”
“yeah, so are you joining us tonight?” he had asked, as if he was bestowing an honour upon you by inviting you to his stupid party.
“i didn’t know you kept birthdays for your cult, haha,” please get the hint, you had prayed.
“we do, yes. you will join us tonight, hm? i want to take you there as my date.”
“oh, no, no i don’t think i will, actually.”
“huh, why not? you had been looking forward to this day for a long time, hadn’t you?”
yeah, you had. obviously you had. but when you were jumping around two weeks ago talking excitedly about a ‘birthday’, you did not mean it to be his cult’s day. was that too hard to notice? but all was okay, of course. ‘how could you ruin such a long relationship over a forgotten birthday?’ you were sure that’s what the older women of the cult would talk about if they knew. and besides, you had many other birthdays to celebrate.
not when he had decided to take another woman as his date for the event, showing that you were completely replaceable to him, no
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TOJI
he had a mission planned out conveniently at midnight, just when the clock would strike 12 and you’d be a year older. but what could you say? it wasn’t as if it was in his control when someone wanted a person to die or not, he was just the man doing the job.
so you had let it go. one hour, two hours, twelve hours, eighteen hours, where the fuck was he?
“hey, sorry ma,” there was loud cheering from his side of the phone.
“where are you?”
“got this race i wanted to bet on actually—”
“shut up, no seriously, shut the fuck up, toji—”
“what? are you okay?”
“no i’m not, what the fuck—”
there was another cheer of celebration from his side. then silence.
“calm d—”
you hung up. 6pm and he was nowhere. you were sure even if he didn’t pick your call up that time. after this, he would go out drinking with shiu all night long, then come back home drunk and wobbling around, mumbling the tune to ‘happy birthday’ if he realized what day it was, and even then, you thought, you were being too optimistic with that last part. but he was an assassin, and you knew that. didn’t he deserve some happiness in life too? and you, you had many other birthdays to celebrate.
not when everyone tried to remind him of the day but he was too far gone to know, no
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SUKUNA
what did you expect? your chamber to be full of decorations? the dining room to be laid with the most beautiful gifts ever? the corridors to be filled with balloons? though none of that was here, the mere mental image of sukuna blowing up balloons and trying not to pop them with his nails was funny.
funny. everything that could make your mind get off right now was funny. blowing the fire of your candelabrum out, leaving behind just smoke and discomfort. funny. pretending the dinner you had been served for the night was your highly expensive banquet designed just for tonight. funny. acting as if sukuna was right by your side, giggling, as if he didn’t always behave like human traditions meant nothing to him. funny.
“it’s my birthday, you know.”
“birthday? alright. what of it?”
“uh, birthday birthday? shouldn’t you be celebrating it?”
“what is there to celebrate? it is merely a day, no?” he had said it so simply that it made you backtrack.
“yes but—”
“and besides, you are only growing older. it would’ve been remarkable and truly something to celebrate if you had been growing younger by the days,” he chuckled, turning away from you to make his way to the council.
you laughed. funny. he was right though, wasn’t he? you had many other birthdays to celebrate.
not when he knew, he knew and he could not care less, showing his disdain for it too, no
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of course, of course you had many other birthdays, many other years yet to come.
but not when it came at the expense of your self-respect, and you had to make a choice between loving and loving yourself, no
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sophie-looks-at-things · 10 months ago
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A Wolf in the Dragon's Den
Pairing: Aemond x Stark reader
Summary: The Greens have won The Dance of Dragons, and your family has offered your hand to Prince Aemond as a means of forgiveness for your part in the war. But what shall happen when a wolf meets a dragon in its den?
Warnings: SMUT, mdni 18+, p in v, kind of mean Aemond? but he gets better lol, Aegon being Aegon, use of pet names like Little Wolf or My Dragon, fingering, soft to rough sex, uhhh language for sure haha if I missed anything let me know y'all!! It's also not proof read so forgive any mistakes haha
AN: Well ... sorry this took me so long y'all! I guess my summer classes caught up to me a bit but that's ok cause after long last here it is!! A good old-fashioned Aemond x Stark reader fic. I hope you guys enjoy haha, I'm working on a request next, but let me know if there's anything else y'all wanna see! :)
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King’s Landing was a hot, humid, fish-smelling shit hole. The warm temperatures were much too hot for your usual furs, heavy cloaks, and skirts. Even your horses were succumbing to the heat, panting more than usual, the poor things. You could have rode in the carriage, along with your mother and younger siblings. But you preferred horseback, the wind in your hair, and the breeze on your skin. Although, the air here was salty and thick. 
Your father and brother, Cregan, rode beside you. “Hells, could it be any hotter,” your father murmured under his breath, sweat beading on his brow.
“Those vapid Targaryen’s couldn’t bear it any other way, something about the ‘dragon’s blood–” 
“Careful brother, they could have your head for that–” You chuckled a bit, but you all knew there was truth to the statement. The Dance of Dragons had proved as much, the Greens' force and display of violence was wide and plentiful. “Rash and brash” as your father had put it once. Especially that of your betrothed, Prince Aemond One-eye Targaryen. Or “the one-eyed cunt” as many northerners took to calling him. The betrothal, much to your dismay, had been arranged by your father, in a weak attempt to repair your house's relationship with the monarch. 
“Hmph, well if I had my way we wouldn’t even be here at all. Those ‘dragons’ wouldn’t survive a damn minute in the North. Their blood would freeze, and then maybe we’d all be rid of their problems.” Cregan said the word “dragons” with a mocking tone, a scoff in his voice. 
“That’s enough, your sister is right boy, they would have your head for that. Or perhaps feed you to one of their dragon’s” And with that, your father put an end to that potentially treasonous conversation. Cregan however, had muttered something under his breath about “told you to stop calling me boy”. 
Having had enough of the bickering, you tapped the sides of your horse, trotting ahead by several paces. Your dire wolf, Snowcap, had evidently decided to part temporarily from the group, to hunt or to shade herself you didn’t know. But you couldn’t blame her either way, the journey from the Winterfell to King’s Landing was a long one, and not a particularly comfortable one.
The gates to the Red Keep came into site ahead of you, the streets leading up to it peppered with Gold Cloaks and guards. The people of King’s Landing pay little mind to your small party, too busy with their buying and selling. You had chosen to travel light, there were no copious amounts of banners flying, or any regalia at all really. You would be surrounded by plenty of that kind of thing soon enough. 
To say that your greeting was lackluster, would be an understatement. Ser Criston Cole stood beside the Dowager Queen Alicent atop the Red Keep’s stairs. Besides another dozen or so Gold Cloaks, that was what there was. Cregan scoffs in annoyance from beside you, he must have caught up to you somewhere along the way. 
“He cannot even come to meet his bride-to-be, what a disrespect, pathetic,” You made a bit of a noise beside him, urging him to keep his mouth shut. You were in the dragon’s den now, who knows who could be listening in? Another glance around the unfamiliar faces does confirm your brother’s statement. Your betrothed was nowhere to be found. Even the training yard remained empty, and from what you’d heard, Prince Aemond could often be found there. 
As you dismount your horse, Queen Alicent begins to make her way down the steps, towards you and the rest of your family. Your father and eldest brother move to stand to your left and right. Your mother and younger siblings finally join you, to your left. Your mother gives you a warm smile and a pat on the shoulder as she moves to stand beside your father. You curtsey as the Queen approaches, she takes your hand in hers. Her palms are soft and warm, gentleness radiates from her person. 
“My Lady Stark, how nice it is to finally see you arrive. I hope the journey south wasn’t too unpleasant” She gives you a small smile, not as lovely as your mother’s, but kind nonetheless. 
“It was alright, long, very long, but alright,” You say, matching her smile. Queen Alicent releases your hand and carries on to greet the rest of your family, Ser Criston following closely behind her. Still no sign of your betrothed, nor his elder brother, the King. Although you supposed he must be occupied with his duties on the Small Council. You know you will hear an earful from your brother later on the matter. Had Creagn been born a Lady, he would indeed circulate most of the gossip around Court.  
— — — — — 
The Red Keep was massive in comparison to your expectations of its size. The halls appear more like an intricate intertwining of mazes rather than passageways. Your footsteps echo and reverberate off of the stones. Tapestries depicting great moments in Targaryen history line the walls. Lit torches line the halls, the windows, and the arches looking out onto bustling the city below. Servants, guards, and other nobles wondered about, gossiping, rushing to and fro. Ladies, lords, and servants alike whispered to one another as you and your family walked by, being led by Ser Cristin and the Queen. 
It was no secret that your brother had sent Northeners and Graybeards to fight in Rhaenyra’s name. “Fight like Northerners they will,” your brother had said once. And they did indeed, the bitter cold and long winters having hardened them into mighty soldiers and fighters. Barbarians, some called them. Your father had handed over the duties of Winterfell to Cregan as he grew older. Your father had hardly left the North in all his years of life, but he had become confused and temperamental in his older age. It had ultimately been Cregan’s choice to join the Blacks, a decision he is now trying to repair. Or it would be more accurate to say you were trying to repair. Since you were a wolf being offered up to the dragons for slaughter. Perhaps the only reason that the Greens hadn’t burned down Winterfell, and your family around with it, is because they know the importance of your family to Westeros. And if the North falls, we all fall, and no one knew the North better than the Starks. 
As you continue on your walk through the winding halls of the Red Keep, you finally come to stand before a set of doors. Modest in comparison to some of the others you’ve passed by. Metal filigree winds its way up from the handles like vines, the rest of the door was rather lackluster. Ser Cristin steps forward, dutifully opening the doors for your party.
There in the middle of the small council room, stood your betrothed. After long last you finally laid eyes on your betrothed. Aemond stood proud and tall, his long silver hair pulled back into one thick braid, tied together at the bottom with a strip of black leather. His back was turned towards you, hands clasped behind him. He was dressed in what appeared to be his riding gear, perhaps he had just come back from a flight with Vhagar.
“Aemond, there you are. You missed the arrival of your betrothed,” Alicent chided her son, who could not be less interested in the conversation at hand. 
“Mhm,” He hummed, “I was–” He paused thinking, “ –busy”. From beside you, you can hear Cregan scoff a bit. Your mother puts a warning hand against his back, he was never one for formalities. But then again, most Northerners weren’t. The Prince finally turned towards your party. The famous leather eye patch covering the sapphire in his socket. The faint pink lines of his scar peeked out on either end of the patch. He’s beautiful, you think, in a macabre sort of way, but beautiful nonetheless. He looked ethereal standing there, backlight from the evening sun shining through the windows. 
His lavender eye rakes itself over your form, as your mother pushes you forward a bit, to better meet his gaze. He lets out another hum, of approval, or disapproval, you cannot tell. A cord of annoyance strikes through you, not having the wherewithal to be subjected to such petty scrutiny. 
Alicent places a guiding hand on your waist, walking you forward, closer to the One-eyed Prince. You curtsey once you reach him, the lessons your mother taught you as a girl kicking in and taking over.
“I did not know you Northerners were capable of such manners,” Aemond scoffed as he said this as if he was telling a bad joke. Your teeth grind together, hands clenching into fists in your skirts. Behind you you can hear the scuffle of footsteps, and then a halt. Presumably, your brother acting out again, or perhaps your father this time. Typically, your family wouldn’t care much about appearances, but you were all treading on thin ice, and you knew it. 
Rising back up to your full height, which annoyingly still made you have to look up at him, you say: “We are rather steeped in our traditions in the North my Prince. We value honor decency, and the truth of one's word,” You glare at him through your lashes as you say this last bit. If it were not for the threat upon your entire house and bannermen then you would not be here, wolves were not creatures made to bow, even in the face of a dragon. 
Surprisingly, Aemond lets out a hardy laugh. You chance a glance over at his mother, she looks to be just as stunned as the rest of you. Silence befalls the room. 
“Smart mouth you have, huh, my Lady Stark?” He chuckles some more, then leans closer, intending his next words to only be for you. “Watch your tongue in my court, or I shall have it served to you on a platter at our wedding feast,” and with that, he straightens, and walks away. Yelling something over his shoulder about the training yard, and Ser Cole come with. 
“I–” Alicent begins to say, but you cut her off, rather impolitely, “ It’s quite alright Your Grace,” You offer her a smile. You liked Alicent, the poor woman had been through enough as it is, and the arrogance of her son wasn’t any help. “I am just pleased to finally have arrived here at court, and to settle in at my new home,” It was most certainly a half-truth, but there was no need to make tensions rise any higher. 
— — — — —
The following next few days were spent quite the same. Your little party with the guidance of Alicent took tours of the Red Keep as well as its many gardens and docks. One afternoon Alicent and Queen Helaena accompanied your mother and yourself down to one of the traveling markets of King’s Landing. It was rather grand, merchants coming from all across Westeros to sell their wares. Helaena had shown you a favorite merchant of hers, a man who made intricate gold and silver jewelry in the shapes of little bugs and small creatures. You had purchased a ring depicting the head of a dire wolf.
Aemond had remained illusive, he only graced everyone with his presence at meals. Choosing to sit far away from you, his brother, the King, talking about who knows what was next to him, but all the while his lavender eye remained fixed on you. It made you squirm a bit, being under his heavy gaze. Overthinking how you raised your fork to your lips, or where you held your cup of wine, on the stem or the rim as you’d always done. 
With your wedding on the morrow, your nerves became more frayed than usual. Your mind is plagued with silly thoughts like: Will he think I’m pretty? Will he learn to love me? But as soon as those thoughts enter they are replaced with others such as: Why should I care? He’s been nothing but unpleasant and rude. But the younger, little girl in you still hopes to have a fruitful marriage, one filled with respect and love. Much like that of your mother and father’s. Although you know now that that is an anomaly in this world. 
Your night is filled with restless sleep. Your body follows a pattern of waking for an hour and then sleeping for another. The heat of King’s Landing did not aid in this, the covers bunched down by your feet as you tossed and turned. Shortly after the sun had risen, maids had burst into your room, wedding gown in hand. You spent the next couple of hours being dotted upon like the princess you were about to become. 
It wasn’t a large service by any means, not that you minded. Something smaller and more intimate was more to your liking. Your father walked you up the long aisle to meet your soon-to-be husband. Aemond stood at the altar in the sept, his house cloak in his hands to drape around your shoulders. The closer you got to him the more you could see his eye attempt to devour your appearance. Surprisingly, he gently held your small hands in his. His fingers and palms were calloused from many hours of training with a sword, and flights upon Vhagar. He was a handsome man you thought, too bad his arrogance made him ugly. Perhaps a bit naively you thought, I can change that. But maybe it was just wishful thinking. Your mind already trying to fix something potentially broken. 
Aemond’s lips touched yours, forever sealing your vows to one another. Unlike his hands, they were smooth and soft, and uncharacteristically gentle. He was a good kisser you think, but then again the only other boy you’d kissed was a farm hand back at Winterfell when you were much younger. 
Aemond thought you were beautiful, the moment he laid eyes upon his Little Wolf he thought perhaps this union will not be one of suffering and strife. At least she will be pretty to fuck. As his lips touched yours in the sept in front of the Gods, he tasted honey and black tea. You smell like vanilla, spices, and what Aemond assumed fire to smell like. His hand came to fist in your hair, possessively anchoring you to him.
When you part you suck in a breath of air, cheeks red. Such a sultry kiss in front of your family and the Gods caused a rush of embarrassment to course through you. Aemond however, gave you a wicked smirk in response to the color in your cheeks. Still clutching your hand tightly in his, he guides his new bride down and out of the sept, to return to the Red Keep for the evening's festivities. 
— — — — —
The great hall was filled with the aroma of cooked meats, potatoes, wine, and the heavy laughter of your party guests. Your mother and father sat with you and your new family at the head table, looking down slightly upon the rest of the partygoers. Where the ceremony may have been smaller, the feast after it was not. Several more houses and bannermen of your brother’s came to celebrate the historic union. Boltons, Lannisters, Freys, Greyjoys, Hightowers, and the like filled the hall. You chose to remain seated beside your new husband, the ever-dutiful wife. You knew and had seen many times how rowdy Northmen could become at such a venue. You preferred to keep your distance, although it was not unusual to find you dancing with your younger siblings back home at Winterfell. 
By the looks of it, your brother had loosened up a bit, a tanker of ale clutched in one hand.
The king had joined him and the others closer in age for what looked to be some kind of drinking game. Meanwhile, Aemond’s hand absent-mindedly made its home on your thigh, stroking up and down. The gesture was a stark contrast to his previous words and actions. 
“You have barely eaten wife,” He noted as he glanced at you, “You must be well full and ready for what I have planned for you.” The same small smirk crosses his lips once again. Leaving you with a funny feeling in your stomach. But you can’t help the small wave of heat that strikes your core. Your mother once told you that men can become rather possessive of their women, and it can be quite cumbersome most of the time. Restricting one's freedom, constantly wanting you in their presence, she had said to expect this with someone like Aemond. But she mentioned that sometimes, in the confines of your marital chambers, it can be very — riveting to lay with such a man. It wasn’t until now that you began to understand what she had meant.
“I am afraid I have no appetite, my lord husband. My nerves do not allow me to eat it seems,” Aemond’s gaze darkened at the use of the word “husband”. Prince Aemond was not a man who did anything halfway, if he were to do anything, it was to be done fully without exception. A wave of dark possession seeps into his gut. He had already claimed a dragon but now he wishes to claim a wolf too. 
From across the hall, his thoughts are abruptly interrupted by his brother's drunken yelling. 
“ – the bedding ceremony! Come now little brother it is time for the bedding ceremony,” Aemond’s fists clenched, the hand on your skirts bunching in the fabric. “Will you fuck her like a hound brother? Woof Woof hahaha,” The hall had fallen eerily silent. Aemond’s chair clatters to the ground from the force of his standing. From beside Aegon, you see your brother place his cup of ale on the table, hand reaching for his sword. Your father is already a step ahead of him, hand on the hilt of his dagger. Your mother goes to stand in front of your younger siblings, shielding them. If you had no appetite before you certainly don’t have one now, your hands had gone cold and clammy, your head feeling light at the insults thrown your way. From beside you, Alicent stands, placing a comforting hand on your shoulder. 
“That is enough Aegon,” She begins to say.
“Oh come now Mother it was only a jest. Can I not be proud of my little brother?” Alicent opens her mouth to respond but Aemond beats her to it.
“You can take your ‘jests’ down to your whores on the Steer of Silk but you will not speak in such a way in front of my wife, let alone her family.” His voice is dangerously calm, ready to snap, and bubble over into pure rage at any given moment. 
“Always so uptight little brother, as if someone has shoved a stick up your ass–” It is your turn to stand now, the feet of your chair scrapping the stone floor beneath you. 
“I am quite tired, husband will you escort me back to our chambers?” You look at Aemond, a stern, silent plea evident on your features. 
“Certainly wife,” He responds with the same tantalizing calmness. Offering you his hand, which you take, grasping on tighter than perhaps necessary, you both make your way out of the great hall. Leaving the mess that is Aegon behind for someone else to clean up. It was your wedding day after all and you needn’t worry yourself with such matters. 
The walk to your marital chambers is quiet and tense. Your hand still firmly grasping Aemond’s, although he now squeezes yours back. The heels of your shoes echo off of the palace walls in an attempt to keep up with Aemond’s long strides. After an eternity of uncertainty at what was to come next, you reach Aemond’s, and now your, chambers. The room is large and furnished quite cozily. A large four-poster bed makes its home in the center back wall of the room. A table of what looks like chess pieces and a map sits by the open windows.
Aemond however reaches for the pitcher of wine on another small side table, pouring a cup for himself and downing it in one go. He pours a second, and a third for you. He offers it to you, you shake your head, afraid you cannot stomach the drink after what had just happened. 
“I am sorry–” You break the silence. Aemond raises a hand to silence you. 
“It is I who should apologize. My brother is a foul and evil creature who feeds off of the discomfort of others. But never had he dared to do so so boldly before,” He pauses, taking a sip of wine. “I have been absent since you arrived at the Keep and I believe I owe you an explanation,” 
You cross your arms over your chest, the air coming in from the harbor seeming chilly now. “Yes I do believe you do,” you say.
Aemond quirks an eyebrow at your sass, a small smile spreading across his lips. “They told me women of the North have sharp tongues and poor manners,” You scoff, his smile widens, “but I must say I’m rather enjoying that thus far.”  He moves toward you, one hand still holding his cup of wine, the other reaching up to cup your chin, turning your face to meet his eye. 
“I must admit that when I learned that your treacherous brother’s offered your hand to me I was quite – unnerved. I had no desire to marry, let alone marry a traitor,” A cord of anger courses through you, and Aemond notices this. He sets his cup down on the table next to you, the one with the chess pieces. Your eyes follow the movement, better taking in the contents of the table, a war game perhaps, you think. 
“I didn’t want to be chained to a dull, meek little pup for the rest of my life,” His now free hand comes to rest on your hip, and his thumb and forefinger move from your chin, to trace the shape of your lips, then your jaw, and down the column of your neck. “But I must say, that you have certainly exceeded my expectations. I shall enjoy breeding you,” His alkaline nose moves to smell your hair, and you inhale a sharp gasp at the vulgarity of his words. You feel him smile into your neck as he continues his ministrations, placing the whisper of a kiss here and there.  
“I do not understand you. You show me kindness, even apologizing for the acts of your brother, but then you insult me and my heritage. What is it that you want from me, Prince Aemond Targaryen?” You question him, hoping your voice comes out as steady as you command it. Aemond pulls back laughing, both hands now finding purchase on your hips, he begins to guide you backward towards the bed. The backs of your knees hit the wooden frame. 
“Perhaps I wish to see how far I can push you Little Wolf. I enjoy your banter and wish to hear more of it. It pleases me that I’ve been matched to a woman who is not afraid to speak to me in such a way. People so quickly cower and whisper when I am near, it is refreshing to be met head-on.” His blunt statement surprises you, you had not expected such a confession from the Prince.
“Perhaps–” You pause, choosing your next words carefully, “ – perhaps then we can learn to love one another in this marriage.” You almost whisper the last bit, uncertainty in your voice. 
“Yes, I think perhaps we can,” Aemond whispers back to you, his lips brushing yours as he speaks. The tension in the air is palpable, maybe he was waiting for you to make the first move. To see how far he could push you as he had said a moment ago. Deciding to test this hypothesis you stand on your tiptoes, slotting your lips against his, just as you did in the sept. A hungry growl leaves Aemond’s throat using his grip on your waist to pull you flush against his chest. He kisses you back with ferocity. 
A hand grapes your throat, guiding you down towards the bed, your back hitting the feather mattress. You gasp against Aemond’s lips, swallowing the sound, he continues his assault. His hand against your throat tightened, although not unpleasantly, heat rushing to your core. His lips begin to retrace their path down your jaw and the column of your neck, biting and sucking red marks in their wake. 
“Aemond– someone will see–” He parts from you only for a second, looking into your eyes. 
“Let them, after all, isn’t that what my imputant brother wanted proof of our coupling? Perhaps it will give him something to pleasure himself to–” The thought makes Aemond’s cock harden impossibly more in his trousers. The fact that he could pleasure his wife to a level that his brother could only imagine, was nearly enough to drive him over the edge. 
“Husband that is not reason enough to leave –” You're interrupted by a particularly sharp bite to the collarbone. A moan of pain and pleasure escapes past your lips, spurring your new husband onwards. With a sharp tug, Aemond pulls the bodice of your dress down, exposing your chest to him. He murmurs a simple “beautiful” under his breath before latching onto one of your nipples, sucking and nibbling at the flesh. Your back arches slightly in response, desperate to bring yourself closer to his touch. 
As he continues his ministrations he begins to unlace the remainders of your gown, shimmying them down your body, to pool at his feet. You feel his calloused hands roam up and down your body. Sketching your shape into his memory. His fingers knead the flesh of your breasts, your thighs, your ass. Finally, he swipes his fingers between your folds, you emit a soft whine at the contact. 
He raises an eyebrow, “I’ve barely even touched you yet Little Wolf, and you're already soaking my fingers. I can’t wait to feel you around my cock–” He trails off, mesmerized as he begins to pump two fingers in and out of your core. Your cheeks flush a deep scarlet at his words. Your hands find purchase in the sheets of your new bed. 
“Oh– oh Aemond –” You whisper in between breaths. 
“Say it again, say my name again,” It’s almost a plea, begging to hear it again.
“Husband– Aemond– My Dragon –” Aemond harshly withdraws his fingers from you. You nearly scream at the loss of the delicious contact. Discarding the remainder of his clothes, tossing them haphazardly to the side, Aemond grabs you by the ankles pulling you down towards the end of the bed where he stands. You catch site of his cock as he gives it a few tugs in preparation. The tip angry and red, glazed in his arousal for you. Your eyes widen a bit, your mother never prepared you for what might happen should your lord husband be too – big. 
Aemond sees your moment of concern, he positions himself over you, cock aligned at your entrance. His hand carresses your cheek, as he says “I shall be gentle, if you ask me to.Give you time to adjust –” 
“No,” Your answer surprises the both of you. “I want you, I am not some small flower, I can take what you give me. I want whatever you shall give me Husband.” You lean up to kiss the tip of his nose, as if to reassure him that what you say is true.
“Seven fucking Hells, you are something did you know that?” He rests his forehead agaisnt yours, as he ever so slowly begins to sheath himself inside of you. 
You let out a small giggle, whispering back “I know–” 
Aemond bottoms out inside of you, his cock fully enclosed by the walls of your cunt. He could die like this, he thinks. Cock sheathed in the cunt of his gorgeous Little Wolf. Your walls squeeze him perfectly, he needs to take a moment to catch his breath. He had fucked women before, whores in the Street of Silk. His brother having dragged him there once, and to seek some kind of perverted comfort there during The Dance. But none of them compared to this moment, none of them –
“Husband, Gods move please,” Aemond is brought out of his thoughts by your pleas, you voice hoarse with want and need. 
“With pleasure Little Wolf.” He begins to thrust, moving his hips at a slow and steady pace. It’s for his own sake as much as it is yours. He’s afraid that should he move to fast he won’t be able to carry on for very long. Beneath him your hands clutch the sheets of his bed, your cheeks are flushed the most lovely red, your hair played out in a halo around you on the pillow. If he could burn the image into his mind forever, then he certainly would. 
Aemond’s cock stretches you out perfectly, boardering on pain and pleasure, but only for the first moments. His thrusts are steady and calculated, but never the less delicious. The movement causes friction on your clit, sending a wave of pleasure to your core. It’s lovely, you think, but you want more. Moving from their place in the sheets, your hands settle on his hips, urging him to move faster.
“Aemond– more,” His lilac eye flits up to your face, asking for silent reassurance that that is indeed what you want. “For Gods sake Husband, move faster please I–” Not needing to be told twice, Aemond picks up speed. Where his thrusts were slow and sensual, now they are fast and hard. He fucks you like a man starved, as if he was told this is the last woman he will ever lay with. Which in his case, was true, since you were married after all. 
Your tits bounce at the force of his movement, your hands that were previously on his hips, begin to rake down his back. Your legs come up to circle his waist, drawing him impossibly closer. 
“You like this then, huh, Little Wolf. Treated like my own personal whore, to fuck how I please?” The sounds that fill the room are egregious, skin against skin, moans, whimpers, and screams. 
“Louder Little Wolf, howl for me, let the whole Keep hear how I pleasure you so,” Perhaps that same small part of him wanted his brother to hear. As if Aemond had something to prove to him, that he made a better husband, a better lover than Aegon ever will. 
“Aemond, Aemond, oh Aemond–” You chant his name like a mantra. His cock hits that sweet spot inside of you, you gasp eyes widening at the feeling. 
“Seems I’ve found where you feel pleasure best. Is that right Little Wolf?” 
“Yes, Gods Aemond, if you don’t stop, I’m gonna –” Hearing that was all the motivation he needed to pick up his pace even more. To fuck you even harder than before. He grips your hips pulling you closer to him at the end of the bed, from this angle he has full control over your body, and can fuck you as you so desire him to.
The force of his thrusts, and the friction against your clit cause you to see stars behind your eyes. With one last scream of his name, you cum around his cock. Your walls pulling him in, attempting to root him to you. Aemond however, does not let up, chasing afer his own release. 
“Just a moment more, my sweet, perfect Little Wolf. I’m going to breed you, and watch you swell with my pups. Wouldn’t you love that huh?” Aemond continues to piston in and out of you, the feeling almost too much, but still just as lovely as before. Nonsensical moans leave your lips, and Aemond laughs at you babbling, although not rudely. 
His hips begin to stutter as he nears his end, his heavy balls slapping against your cunt. “Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck,” He mutters under his breath as you feel his seed coat your walls. The feeling warm, and full and lovely. Aemond remains seated inside of you as he rests his forehead once more to yours. You kiss his nose again, a new favorite spor perhaps. He offers you a small smile in return.
You both groan as he pulls out. Your cunt perfectly overstimulated and happy. Wordlessly Aemond leaves the bed, and begins to rummage around some drawers in one of the many pieces of furniture in the room. You worry for a brief moment that he will leave, and that he meant none of what he said. But as he brings a damp cloth between your thighs to clean you, your worries wash away. He tosses the rag aside, to be dealt with on the morrow. For now, all he wanted was to lay with his wife in his arms as he drifts off to sleep. 
A comfortable silence falls over the two of you as you move to covers to lie beneath them. Aemond pulls you to him, tucking the top of your head under his chin, he kisses your hair. You both think that perhaps this marriage will be fruitful, that over time you will learn to love one another. It seems as if you both are on a lovely start for that though as is. 
“Good night ñuha jorrāeliarzy (my beloved),” Aemond mutters into your hair. 
“Sleep well, My Dragon,” you say in response. You both drift off into a peaceful sleep, held comfortably in each other's arms. No one knew what the morrow would bring, let alone a fortnight from now. But you both knew you would see it through together as equals, husband and wife, dragon and wolf.
Tag List:
@helaenaluvr @anukulee @darylandbethfanforever9 @stuckinaf4nfiction
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5sospenguinqueen · 11 months ago
Text
Lullabies Pt 2 | Max Verstappen x Singer! Reader
Summary: Max left without letting you fully explain. Nearly a year later, he realises he made a mistake when he thinks you're moving on.
Warnings: Swearing. Angst but also fluff. Redemption arc.
Female reader with various faceclaims (pics found on pinterest). Takes place in 2021 with slightly altered timelines.
Main Masterlist
prev.
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Oct
YourUserName just posted
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liked by pierregasly, kellypiquet and others
YourUserName a huge thank you to everyone who came to my album release concert! 🥀 a huge apology to anyone who missed out but after such a phenomenal crowd this evening, i'm pleased to announce the GUTS tour coming 2022!!
11,998 comments
User1 a tour!!! release the dates/countries now please and thank you
User2 mother treating us
User3 okay but when she SANG The Grudge with the tears rolling down her cheeks, poured her whole soul into that
→ User4 omg yes, you could legit feel the pain in your own chest
→ User5 no no no because what about the gasp through her sobbing at The Stranger
User6 nobody can tell me that Obsessed wasn't written as a kelly piquet pov
→ User7 haha literally because y/n has never said a bad word about this woman but she is all up in her business 
→ User8 and all up in her likes too from what i saw
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User8 not my delusional ass hoping it’s max and that the lighting just made his hair darker
User9 love how she’s still featured on the wags page despite her and max not being a couple for 10 months now
→ User10 legit. they post her more than kelly
User11 i bet max is kicking himself for letting her go now that someone else has realised how much she’s worth 
FutureF1Wag i need to know where f1 wags got that pic from because it’s SOOO much clearer than the one i got
User12 okay but where can i get a man like that because that kiss looks hawt!
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Nov
YourUserName just posted a new story
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lilymhe have the best time, babe. brunch debrief tomorrow?
→ YourUserName 11?
→ lilymhe absolutely 
YourBestFriend oo look at you being treated right 
→ YourUserName i know. how sweet
they're sooo pretty as well
→ YourBestFriend you’ve had bigger though 
→ YourUserName don’t do this today 
→ YourBestFriend sorry. be safe. text me when you’re home 
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Dec
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User1 max really said, just because i didn't want her doesn't mean anyone else can
→ User2 be serious, he clearly loves her. he just confused his priorities for a hot second
User3 the way these rumours have been floating since max and kelly went social media official though. like everyone has constantly said they're on the rocks since we found out about them
→ User4 literally. like i loved max and y/n but they've both moved on. people are just creating drama because they can't accept that max and y/n aren't together anymore
User5 no because y/n is literally max's forever after and nobody can convince me otherwise
User6 max and y/n are literally each other's one true love. kelly was just the poison apple that leads to their true love's kiss
User7 y/nstappen shippers rise!
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User8 she's watching his races again!
User9 she watched him win!!
User10 @ YourBestFriend is just like us for real. you can tell she's been praying for them to get back together
→ User11 she's feeding us crumbs and we're lapping them up
User12 not red bull down here fighting with us in the trenches
maxverstappen1 just posted
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liked by YourUserName, danielricciardo and others
maxverstappen1 FUCK YEAH! WORLD CHAMP! 🥇🇳🇱 a huge thank you to @ redbullracing for their support throughout the whole season. you made all of this possible.
7,330 comments
redbullracing what a season! here's to many more, champ
christianhorner so unbelievably proud of you! enjoy the celebrations
danielricciardo congrats, mate. couldn't be happier for you. looking forward to celebrating later 🍾
landonorris woohoo! my shirt is still wet from your tears
→ maxverstappen1 don't lie. you cried more than i did
→ landonorris true
mclaren well done, max! an amazing achievement
YourUserName congrats, world champ x
liked by maxverstappen1
→ User13 mama en papa
→ User14 not the best phrase to use when the reason they broke up is due to a miscommunication about having children 
User15 omg omg omg, not a drill, guys. the queen has commented. and max liked!! 
→ User16 user we may not get them back together but i’ll take the tiny trickles of friendship they give us
→ User17 same sis same 
→ User18 may our delulus come trululu
YourUserName just posted
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liked by maxverstappen1, carmenmmundt and others
YourUserName so i may have just won my first grammy? my ultimate gratitude to @ lovelessofficial for taking a chance on me when no one else would, the biggest love to those who supported me before i deserved it, and a final huge thank you to the inspiration behind the album 💕🦁
9,556 comments
User1 miss thing, looks like you got more than just your first grammy
→ YourUserName it's definitely a nice collection ;)
francisca.cgomes so proud of you, minha linda 🌼
→ YourUserName couldn't have done it without you pouring wine down my neck, kiks
lilymhe that's my girl!!
YourBestFriend wow, look at that dress. it would look better on my bedroom floor
liked by maxverstappen1
lewishamilton amazing achievement, y/n. well done
→ YourUserName thanks, lewis. you raced so well this season
danielricciardo did somebody say celebratory drinks later? 🥂
maxverstappen1 congrats, grammy winner x
liked by YourUserName
→ lovelessofficial thanks for joining us for the celebrations
→ User2 max was at her after party!!!!
→ User3 over a year after their breakup and we might be getting them back together??
User4 the trophies in their house must be overwhelming 
→ User5 love that we’re talking like they’re already back together
User6 'the inspiration behind the album' is so shady and sweet haha, poor max. i love that he'll be forever reminded of how badly he fumbled
→ User7 what makes you think she's on about max
→ User6 um, she wrote the album after their breakup and used the lion emoji, which she always used in posts about him. read the room, babes
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Jan
YourUserName just posted
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liked by victoriaverstappen, charles_leclerc and others
YourUserName happy new year's from me and my loved ones to you and yours (yes, he got drunk after this and ruined the rest of my photos)
13,441 comments
User8 omg omg omg omg!!!
User9 they're back together! they're back together! we win!
charles_leclerc beautiful couple. glad to see you both happy again
danielricciardo yuck. i haven't missed the pda
→ YourUserName you're just jealous you can't be our third
→ danielricciardo every day baby
maxverstappen1 i didn’t ruin them! they just become less pg
→ User10 woah, mr verstappen, we were not familiar with you
redbullracing our favourite trophy winning couple. can't wait to have y/n back in the paddock next month
maxverstappen1 looking forward to all that the future brings us, mijn mooie vrouw 🥰
→ YourUserName mijn lieve echtgenoot 💕
→ User11 um, the pet names!!!
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I know some people said on Danny’s that they wanted it to be longer but this are only planned as a duo series. Sorry, guys! 💕
Baby Fever Angst Series
Tag list
@bibissparkles @barcelonaloverf1life @rlalliehayes @dullypully @softtina @callsignwidow @lav3nder-haze @minkyungseokie @luvrrish @fall-bambi @evans-dejong @sadsierra2 @justdreamersdream @spookystitchery @dark-night-sky-99 @majusialikesfastcars @luckyladycreator2 @bborra @mrosales16 @reguluscrystals @tvdtw4ever @alwaysclassyeagle @gigicisneros @spanishcorndogs @thecubanator2 @goldenharrysworld @awritingtree @jxnellat @sbrn0905 @hc-dutch @buckybarnessweetheart @ironmaiden1313 @dreamercrowd @yourbane @reguluscrystals @peachiicherries @g-l-o-b-e-w-h-o-r-e @itsjustmyopinionf1 @evesfile @openthenyoor01 @princessria127 @hrrorflm @the-untamed-soul @nataliambc @oliviarodrigostan13 @sweate-r-weathe-r
As always, so sorry if I missed anyone. Thanks for all your support x
2K notes · View notes
purinfelix · 6 months ago
Note
yes Ollie fics I BEGGG🙏🏻🙏🏻
sweet as sugar ⟡ ݁₊ . - ollie bearman
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summary: it isn't everyday you see a classmate shopping at the grocery store you work at, especially not when he's buying the most expensive ingredients possible. w/c: 3.4k
a/n: your wish is my command !!! been binging the bear necessities vlogs so i felt verrrryyy inspired for this one (also bc i recently started a second job as a checkout chick HAHA)
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Working at a grocery store was far from glamorous - but given that it was close to your university, you figured it was definitely far from the worst part-time job you could've taken up. In between stocking shelves and dealing with rude customers, it hadn't been too bad, and that was the reason you had stayed for over a year.
In that time, you had seen your fair share of things. Given that the dorms were so close by, it wasn't uncommon for you to recognise people from class. Often they were polite enough to start up some small talk or ignore you completely, leaving with several bags of instant ramen and frozen garlic bread, more than enough to last them the week.
But this, this was new.
"Oh, hi," he lets out, polite and a little shy as he piles his groceries onto your conveyer belt.
"Hey," you let out, a little drawn out to show your confusion at the multi-coloured produce headed towards you. You spot a couple radishes, a whole head of cabbage and several jars of spice amongst everything else. "Do you have your own bags?"
"Oh, yeah," he mumbles, reaching into his back pocket and producing several reusable bags, most of them from your grocery store chain - you find it a little cute, though you don't say anything.
"I think I've seen you around, you know," he says quickly, refusing to acknowledge the elephant in the room as he positions the bags. You drag your focus away from the items you're scanning and study his face instead - he's tall but boyish, and his eyes are round and innocent as he looks at you.
"Right, Professor Royce's class, stats right?"
His expression lights up, almost out of relief at you not asking about the groceries. "Yeah! It's tough, isn't it?"
"Yeah, and he marks really strict as well, a friend of mine got a quarter mark taken off because her power wasn't written high enough."
"Jeez, that's rough," he laughs, and his eyes flicker between yours and your hands as you bag the last of his things.
"Your total will be $75.80," you announce, pulling a face to show that you don't envy how much he's going to have to pay - but to your surprise, his expression doesn't falter as he reaches for his wallet, pulls out his credit card and taps it without another word.
"Thanks, see you around," he smiles, as he takes his several bags with ease and leaves, the automatic doors closing behind him. You find yourself watching him, gaze lingering as his lean figure grows smaller and smaller in the direction of the dorms. What could he possibly be using that kind of food for, how many people was he planning on feeding - and most importantly, what sort of dorm fridge would fit all that?
You hear an annoyed grunt from in front of you as you're once reminded of your job, turning to face a stern-looking woman. "Sorry ma'am," you let out, beginning to scan her items - though your mind doesn't leave him, not for a while.
Given how much he had bought, you didn't think you'd run into your classmate at your job for a while. To your surprise though, it's less than a week until you see him again, and for about a month he continues showing up weekly - and as fate would have it, always when you were on shift and at your register.
What's even weirder though, is the fact that the two of you barely make it beyond awkward small talk about the singular class you share in common or the weather lately. Still, you manage to glean some information - his name (Ollie), his major (marketing) amongst other, smaller, details like the fact that he normally comes in the mornings to get the freshly baked loaves of bread, or that he has an unusually large collection of reusable grocery bags.
For the most part, you don't mind, working at a grocery store register has made you vulnerable to over a year of awkward conversations. What seems to actually get to you though, is the gnawing curiosity of just what on earth he could be using all this for because, at the rate you see him, he can't be the only one eating it.
You're busy pondering this thought, mindlessly stocking shelves mere minutes before closing one night - until you notice a familiarly lanky figure creep up behind you.
"Oh!" you gasp out in surprise, but when you spot the full grocery basket in his hand you dart quickly behind the register to help him. For a minute it seems like your opportunity to get to the bottom of this mystery has reared its head.
However, from the awkward smile he gives you in greeting and the way he nervously shoves his hands in his pockets while he scoots up to your register - you're inclined to just mind your own business and leave the poor boy alone. That is until you break eye contact with him and turn to the items now moving towards you.
He seems to have replaced his normal fresh produce and meat for dessert ingredients, and you watch as several bars of dark chocolate - the most expensive brand your store carries, at that - cartons of eggs and sacks of flour make their way towards you.
"Okay Ollie I'm sorry, but I have to ask," you hold your hands out as you preface your question, "What on earth do you do with all this stuff?"
"Oh, I mean, a boy's gotta eat right?" He laughs shyly, causing you to furrow your brows to show your doubt.
"I don't mean to judge but, surely that's a lie."
He looks almost disappointed at the fact that you don't believe his obviously made-up excuse, as he looks down at his feet to avoid eye contact.
“Well, you see,” he starts, and you can hear the squeaking sound of his sneakers against the store floor. “It’s sort of embarrassing.” 
“C’mon, it can’t be that bad,” you reply, waiting for him to hit you with it, only to be met with a moment of silence as the two of you just stand there, even the conveyor belt refusing to move. 
“What, you cooking for a roster of girls every night?” You joke, desperate to diffuse the suffocating silence. 
“Wh- no!” he replies immediately, hands springing up in defence, causing you to let out a low laugh. 
“Well?” 
He takes a step closer to the register, looking around as if to make sure no one will eavesdrop - despite the two of you being the only ones in the store - before whispering to you. “I’m an influencer, like, a cooking influencer. 
You hear yourself let out a shocked laugh, and Ollie’s eyes widen in response as his cheeks burn up. 
“Sorry, that sounded mean, but that’s actually really cool!” you blurt out. 
“Oh,” he laughs in relief, “I mean it’s not that cool.” He shuffles around awkwardly to help you bag his groceries, though you’re pretty sure he’s just eager to avoid eye contact. 
“Home come I’ve never heard of you before?” 
“Well, I keep it anonymous,” he sighs, “not many people in real life know.” 
“Wow, you’re a proper Peter Parker.” 
“Yeah, if his superpower was stuffing up puff pastry for the third time.” 
“$32,” you read out his total, pausing before following up, “you know, I don’t know if I completely believe you.” 
“Wh- why would I lie?” he asks as he taps his card. 
“I don’t know, to hide the fact that you’re actually cooking for a never ending rotation of girlfriends.” 
“Oh please, I wish that was the case,” you quirk your eyebrow at his response, showing just how much you’re struggling to believe him. As he loops his arms through the several grocery bags, he catches sight of your expression. 
“Wh- look me up then!” 
“Alright, what’s your username,” you say, whipping out your phone. 
He seems to regret his words, his voice immediately shrinking to a shy tone, “promise you won’t make fun of it.” 
“Just tell me Ollie.” 
“It’s, @ bear in the kitchen.” 
You have to fold your lips together to stop yourself from letting out a laugh as you type the user into your search bar. However, once it pops up your eyes widen in shock instantly.
“Ten thousand followers? Ollie, holy shit!” He lets out a little chuckle as you continue to scroll through his posts. “God this stuff looks amazing.” 
“Alright, just don’t tell anyone about it okay? I don’t need this spreading around,” he sighs nervously. 
Lowering your phone, you feel an idea coming to you, “well what’s in it for me?” 
Once again, you watch his brows rise in shock as he chews on his bottom lip, thinking. You’re about to break the silence to tell him you’re only kidding, and that of course you wouldn’t tell anyone and that it’s totally f-
“What time do you get off?” 
“Wh- in about five minutes?” 
“Do you want to come watch?” 
“Watch what?” 
“Me cook, duh,” he says, making it seem like you’re the one being crazy here. 
“Huh?” 
“I live in the dorms so it isn’t too far and you could even try some of it if you want, unless you’ve got something on after this that is.” 
“I mean, not really.” 
“Great, then, help me with these will you?” 
So that’s how you ended up closing up a little earlier, and then helping your classmate Ollie - who a couple weeks ago had been little more than a stranger - carry his ingredients back to his dorm. If you had told anyone that, they probably would’ve called you crazy, and you would’ve agreed. But still, no matter how many times you tried to wake yourself up from this strange dream, you were still there - closing the store, in the elevator with him, even watching as he struggled to use his keys to open his dorm. 
“I got lucky with the dorm lottery this year,” he explained as he finally managed to get the door unlocked, “I think it’s supposed to be for special accomodation students but no one took it so, I figured I would.” 
“Woah,” was all you could say as he ushered you in and shut the door quickly behind you. And woah was correct, given that his 'room' was the size of a small apartment, and much much bigger than any of the other shoeboxes most students got. Aside from the usual bed and desk, he also had his own small lounge room and bathroom - and of course, a kitchenette, which you recognised from the background of his videos. "Lucky is an understatement."
All he does is let out a low laugh in response as he lifts the grocery bags onto the counter, prompting you to do the same. "Do you want my help?" you ask.
"No, I mean you're my guest if anything, so you can just pull up a chair and watch," he offers you a warm smile before turning to unload the bags, stuffing condiments into cupboards and tossing things into the fridge. You do as he says, finding yourself a stool and scooting it over to the counter so you can watch him.
You're amazed, obviously by the fact that someone as unexpected as a boy from your statistics class has a cooking page, but more so by the nature of his movements. After setting up his phone on a small tripod and clicking record, he falls into a rhythm that's mesmerisingly beautiful to watch. Every grab of a bowl or flick of his wrist as he whisks this and stirs that, like a conductor bringing together a symphony.
You don't realise how long you've been silent until he looks up at you, almost as if to silently ask if you have any questions, all the while he's separating a couple egg yolks from their whites.
"So, what exactly are you making?"
"Mille-feuille," he responds.
"Milly- huh?"
He laughs softly at your attempt to mirror his pronunciation. "It's a French dessert, basically just puff pastry with some cream but it's a pain to make."
"So why are you making it?"
"Well, it's fun, I guess? It's nice to challenge myself to do things, even if it takes me a while, the satisfaction of mastering it is really like nothing else." He turns to you, a slight sparkle in his eye and you're taken aback by the pure passion in the way he talks.
"Wow, you really enjoy this, why are you studying at university then? Why not do this full-time as a chef or something?"
"Don't be silly, this is just like a hobby there's no way I could make it a job."
"Ten thousand people seem to say otherwise," you say, and as he pulls a couple things out of the oven and places them on the counter he turns to look at you with an expression that's equal parts confused and surprised. "Well, ten thousand people plus me."
He smiles earnestly, though you can tell you've made him a little shy by the way his cheeks are flushed. "Well, you haven't even tried it yet."
"You're right, how much longer?"
"Maybe another five minutes, why do you need to go?" His expression morphs into one of worry, almost as if he's pleading you not to leave.
"No," you laugh, "I'm fine to stay for as long as you want me to."
"Okay, good, I just," he says, searching for an excuse, "I just want you to taste it before you go."
"Right," you hum, looking around his dorm, or more his apartment complex. "If I had a space as big as this I'd probably throw a party every second night."
"Oh nah, parties aren't really my thing." You watch as he looks down shyly and for the first time, you notice the way the dim kitchen lights illuminate his soft brown curls.
You notice that the only thing separating the two of you is a couple inches of marble countertop and that this is the longest conversation you've had with him, ever. You notice, when his brown eyes rise to meet yours, that the bashful smile spread across his face makes your heart rate quicken a bit more - and for the couple of seconds you're able to hold eye contact with him, you're thinking about how oddly intimate this moment is.
A loud ringing sound brings you back to the current moment - the timer that Ollie set a couple minutes ago signalling that his dish is ready to plate. You straighten up on your stool, eyes darting around as the boy across from you hurries to take out a plate. You pull out your phone, just to have something to do with your hands, but as you do you hear a couple soft groans coming from Ollie's direction.
"Hey," you hear his timid tone call out to you, "could you help me?"
Hopping off of your stool, you pad your way over to where he's bent at an awkward angle, trying his best to hold a broken sheet of puff pastry together.
"Just put your hands where mine are," he instructs you, and you do as he says, allowing him to let out a sigh of relief as he reaches for a piping bag. As he does, you notice the phone camera pointed directly towards you.
"Won't I be in your shot?" you ask nervously.
"Don't worry, your face won't be in it and I can edit it out if you want," he brushes you off, clearly more concerned with the structural integrity of his dessert.
"Oh, right."
"Wait, just-" his voice is just above a whisper and before you realise what's happening you feel his warm touch on yours as he nudges your hands slightly into position. You try not to overthink the fact that his touch alone makes you feel so flustered that you almost drop the pastry. "Okay, hold still."
"Yes, chef," you joke in as serious a tone as you can, trying to alleviate the suddenly intimate tension between you two. You watch silently as he pipes a couple of dollops of custard onto the pastry then nudges you once more to let you know you can let go as he reaches for the last piece of pastry to place on top.
The two of you stand back, and you hear him let out a proud huff as he rests his hands on his hips. "Finally," he breathes, reaching into a drawer to retrieve a spoon.
As you watch him break apart the pastry he spent the last hour trying to perfect, you catch the tender smile he gives you and feel your heart warm at the fact that he seems so different to the awkward, shy boy you first served a couple weeks ago. The image of your classmate, who you only ever saw shuffling out of class as soon as possible, melts away as Ollie confidently scoops some of the custard onto the spoon.
You wait for him to bring it to his own lips, but instead watch it take a turn towards you, his eyes catching yours.
"Here," he smiles, "a payment for your help."
"Wh-" You're taken aback, partially by him not wanting to taste his own food first, but mostly by the fact that he seems to be insisting on feeding it to you. Obediently, you open your mouth and he feeds you the dessert, other hand cupping your chin to catch any crumbs that fall - and you can only hope he doesn't feel how hot your face gets when he does.
"Holy shit Ollie, that's delicious!" You exclaim, watching as his eyes survey your expression.
"Really? That's a relief then," he laughs, taking his own serving of the dessert, nodding thoughtfully as he tastes it. For the thousandth time that night, the two of you stand in silence, just looking at each other - though it's less awkward than you thought and more comfortable.
Until you see your phone on the countertop buzz awake and you catch sight of the time.
"Oh crap, it's past midnight!" you gasp, reaching for it and sending a text back to your roommate, who's probably wondering where you are.
"Do you need to get back?" Ollie asks, brows furrowed.
"Yes, I'm sorry, and thank you for all this it really was amazing-" you ramble out as you try your best to shove your feet into your shoes by the doorway. He seems a little lost by your sudden movements, dropping the spoon and padding his way over to you.
"Do you need me to walk you home?"
"No, no it's fine, I'm just in the next building and you should probably get to cleaning up all this anyways," you gesture to the small mess of used pans and bowls waiting for him in the kitchen behind.
"Right," you catch a tinge of disappointment in his tone, "well get home safe okay?"
"I will," you insist, letting out small grunts as you finally manage to get your second shoe on, "oh, and send me the video you post about this, I want to see my cameo!"
He laughs, "of course."
You're just about to reach for the doorknob and bid him farewell when you hear his voice pipe up again, a little less sure this time.
"Oh and hey, do you think you'd want to do this again?"
"Come over and watch you cook?" You're a little confused by his request since you were sure you had just been in his way all night.
"Yeah, I mean it's nice to have someone keep me company, and help me out when I need it," his hand rubs the back of his nape as he looks at the floor.
"Sure, I'd love to Ollie, you know where to find me anyways."
"Checkout number 4," he laughs, "goodnight."
"Goodnight Ollie," you respond with a smile and a wave before opening his dorm door and leaving.
It's only once you're out in the night air, frantically rushing from his building to yours - that you notice the smile hasn't left your face.
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(and as a little something extra, a mockup of ollie's account :)) )
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taglist: reply/send an ask to be added!
@multifan-idk @presleycaudle @hadesnumber1daughter @monbear38
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another-random-paradise · 1 year ago
Note
Hello everything is fine? I just found your account and I'm already in love!!!
I loved your sleepy confession writing post, if it doesn't bother you and only if you want, could you do it for Kalim, Jamil and Ruggie? They are so cute!!! >w<
Oh, and sorry if the English is wrong, it's not my first language...
An even sleepier confession
Thank you for the request and the sweet words!! And don’t worry about your English, it’s great! Plus, it isn’t my first language either, so i get the struggle, haha! :)
——————————————————————————————————
Crush!Reader sleepily telling him, they want to marry him / part one
Characters: Kalim, Jamil, Ruggie
Format: Headcanons
Warnings: None that i can think off
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Kalim 
-Chances are, you were at one of his party’s, stayed late, and are too tired to go back to ramshackle 
-so, Kalim being Kalim, annoys convinces Jamil to let you two have a sleepover. The absolute energy boost Kalim gets after getting permission already makes Jamil regret his decision..
-after a long night of story telling (with how many siblings Kalim has, he definitely always has tea to spill), pillow fights, and movie marathons, you finally decide to go to sleep, much to Jamils relief
-Just before you two fall asleep though, you unconsciously make one last comment “Life is always so fun with you, really makes me wanna marry you one day..”
-If you thought you’d get any sleep after a comment like that, you’re wrong! Because Kalim is now wide awake and practically yelling in excitement 
-He’d be asking you if you really meant it, before talking about how you’ll have to meet his family first, especially all his siblings! They’ll love you!! Why don’t you come with him over the next Holidays?! All while being all over you, kind of like an exited puppy are those ears and a tail??, meanwhile you’re just sitting there like ‘oh shit, I said that out loud?!’ 
-It’ll only get worse if you confirm that, yes, you do, in fact, want to be with him and maybe, hopefully, marry him one day 
-Jamil storms in, thinking you two were getting assassinated or something, only to see Kalim hugging you, practically shaking in excitement, talking about all the dates he’ll take you on (and about your wedding of course)
-you sheepishly look over at Jamil, who is staring daggers into you, the message clear ‘you couldn’t have waited until morning?’. If looks could kill, Jamil would have cut you into a three course meal just now :D 
-Jamil tells him to quiet down, so the rest of the dorm can rest
-Kalim continues to whisper-yell, till eventually you two fall asleep cuddling 
-the next day, half the school already knows about your now relationship, partially because the entirety of scarabia could hear him, and partially because Kalim can’t keep his mouth shut-
-He is so hung up on that marriage comment, that he might accidentally introduce you as his fiancée a few times!
Jamil
-you, being the kind soul that you are, probably decided to help him out with his chores around Scarabia 
-But unlike him, you aren’t used to so much work, No matter how much Crowley tries to overwork you so eventually you’re just straight up exhausted.
-Jamil brings you to one of the many couches, but he makes sure it’s one away from the business of the dorm, he wouldn’t want you to be disturbed while you sleep he cares to much about you for that
-He picks up the few dirty plates some other students left behind, as you get comfortable, which is a very easy task, considering all those silk blankets and soft pillows! You mumble something a mere second before falling asleep. “You’re so caring, Jamil… makes me want to marry you even more than i already to..”
-Jamil halts in his tracks, he almost drops the plates he was carrying! Partially because he’s flustered, but also because a part of him hoped you wouldn’t like him back and the crush would pass.. not that it ever would have
-He is lost in thought as he makes his way to the kitchen, he almost even runs into another student
-Jamil likes you, he really does, there’s no doubt there, but he’s worried more than anything. He doesn’t have time for love!
-not only would you distract him from keeping Kalim from accidentally getting himself killed, but his work would mean that he’d have little to no time to spend with you.. not to mention if you get married, you and your future children would be forced to work for the Asim family too- Unless..
-If he takes you’re last name, instead of him yours, neither of you would be a part of the Viper name any longer. Instead of him enslaving you into service, you could free him from his life of servitude.
-And you always find ways to hang out, despite how busy he is
-He continues to work, now with a smile on his face. 
-Maybe this could work out after all :)
Ruggie
-Another one who you were probably helping with work
-Usually he’d refuse help, he doesn’t want to be indebted to anyone, but hey, it’s an excuse to spend more time with you, so he’ll make an exception 
-Afterwards, your beat.. even after book 3 and knowing him for a while, you never could have guessed how much work just one certain Lion could make.
-He lays down next to you, either making a sarcastic or teasing comment as he does.
-As always, you laugh in response, but this time you follow it up with “You’re a great guy, you know that? I hope i get to marry you one day..”
-His usual smug smirk, is gone. Just like that. It’s replaced by absolute shock
-He turns to you, to question you about it, only to see you’re already in the land of dreams 
-Ruggie doesn’t know how to feel, He is shocked, flustered, and most of all, confused. Yes, he is happy that you like him back, it just confuses him.
-You’re in a school filled with rich guys and literal Royalty. So, by the seven, why would you like a guy like him? Especially since your first meeting was literally him stealing a sandwich from your son friend! 
-But it makes him smile, in a school filled with rich people, someone as amazing as you, still chooses him, so he must be really great, right?
-Now he’s even more determined to get a good job, so that he can give you and your possible children a good life!
-He just hopes his Grandma and the kids will like you.. nah, he’s sure they will, you’re you! 
-He won’t immediately make his move to ask you out, but he’s definitely working on it! He would be a bit more hesitant about asking you out (Even after you basically asked to marry him) if you’re a girl, as in nature male hyenas are naturally more submissive towards the female they’re trying to court 
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This was so much fun to write, thank you so much for the request!!
Feedback is welcomed, just please be nice!! Hope you all have a nice day <3
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subbmissivesuccubus · 2 years ago
Text
Bully- Part 1
Summary: Your bully's, Gojo and Geto, find out an embarrassing secret of yours and will never let you live it down. But maybe, you don't want them to.
Disclaimer: 18+ fic. Gojo X Fem reader X Geto. Humiliation kink. Free use kink. Gojo and Geto being mean. Bully Geto and Gojo. Dub-con warning. It is subtly implied that reader wants and enjoys what's happening to her, but the boys don't care to ask for consent.
a/n: Sorry it took so long wah but here's part one to the series. I plan to write many more cause damn it is so fun haha. I promise, the next part will have all the gratuitous smut and ruthless fucking this premise deserves. Consider this an appetizer <3
Taglist: @bisexuawolfsalt @candycandy00 @nekonanamii @sirimiripetrichor @collectionofdolls @dreamsxmerci
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You sighed as you walked towards your classroom, dragging your feet, knowing full well what was waiting for you. It was the end of the day and it was your turn to clean up the classroom and just your luck- you were paired up with the two people you couldn't stand.
Gojo and Geto. The two 'strongest' sorcerers of your school. Their reputation preceded them. One of them was the prodigal son of a famous family with a deadly technique while the other had an incredibly useful and powerful skill as well. Everyone disliked them to some extent, but nobody could deny that the Jujutsu world would be worse without them.
Which is why it always confused you as to why these two powerful men seemed to love bullying you.
They were never malicious but damn if they weren't annoying. They loved to tease and prank you, joking about how weak you were and how you couldn't do anything by yourself. Forget the fact that you were actually quite strong and capable- but compared to them- everyone was weak.
But they seemed to enjoy bullying you especially even if there were classmates who were of lower grade than you. Stealing your drink right before you were going to take it from the vending machine, taking unflattering pictures of you and distributing it, embarrassing you in front of strangers by treating you like a dumb baby in front of them, making loud sex noises if you were on the phone with someone, tossing away your books and stealing your money-
Gojo spanking your ass casually a few times, Geto licking off some chocolate that was smeared next to your lips like it was a normal thing to do and even that one time when they cornered you in the hallway and convinced you to let them grope your boobs:
"If you let us squeeze your tits, we'll leave you alone for a week~" Gojo had said, wangling his fingers comically as they both stared at your chest like perverts. The offer was too good to give up which led to them squeezing your clothed tits for ten second each before they left, laughing at how easy it was to use you. And of course, they continued to bother you anyway.
You could have made a complaint to the higher ups about their behavior, something your friends have told you to do but you refused. You didn't want to be the wuss who was running to the elders over something so childish when everyone has an important job to do. Dealing with some bullying was easy compared to fighting to the death with some curses.
Besides, if you reported on them...
You steeled yourself before opening to the door to the classroom, met with the sight you expected: Gojo and Geto, lounging around, not doing any work as they waited for you to do it for them because, in their words: 'the weaklings need to put in more effort'.
But what you were not expecting to see was your phone in Gojo's hand using earplugs that he had connected to the device. You knew you left your phone in the locker assigned to you in the hallways which meant these two managed to pick the lock and take it. But the anger over that was dwarfed by your sudden realization:
The way they were looking at you as you closed the door, giving you a shocked look but you could tell there was an underlying hint of pure glee.
Uh oh.
"Give me back my-"
You yelped as Geto suddenly grabbed your wrist and pulled you towards him, barely giving you a second to collect yourself before he wrapped his arms around your neck, catching you in a choke-hold. Before you could even react, he pulled your back against him and manhandled you as he sat on a classroom bench and forced you to sit between his legs, wrapping said legs around you. You were completely caught, your nails doing nothing even as you dug it into his arms.
"Holy fuck!" Gojo explained, eyes wide and a huge grin on his face as he continued to listen to the audio on your phone, looking over at you and Geto opposite of the table he was sitting on, "You're a perverted freak, aren't you?"
"Give it back!" you snapped, grunting in annoyance as you tried to break out of Geto's hold but the man simply laughed as he held you tighter, his legs not budging.
"This is some nasty stuff!" Gojo continued, "Who knew a weakling like you would be such a masochistic slut~" he removed the earbuds from the socket and increased the volume as he confirmed what you had feared:
"Yeah? you like that don't you? Little slut~" a man's voice echoed throughout the room from your phone speakers, "Everybody looking at you as I fuck this sloppy little pussy~ Oh this cunt is dripping for me- did you like being spanked in front of them so much?"
It was an erotic audio you had saved on your phone, one of many that you enjoyed in private. You had even saved it under non-suspicious names which meant that the boys were digging through your files to find something- and they did.
"This isn't even the only one we heard, you know." Gojo explained as he dangled the phone in front of you mockingly, "What was it again? A girl getting humiliated by her teacher in front of her classmates-"
"A girl getting groped by her boyfriend on a crowded train." Geto recollected, his lips so close to your ear you could feel his hot breath dance against your skin.
"Being used as a free-use toy by a group of guys~" Gojo said, a giant shit eating grin on his face, "Seems like this one has a humiliation kink~"
"I'm not surprised." Geto said, leaning into your ear and blowing into it, making you gasp and jump, "No wonder she never reported us to the principle for all the times we preyed on her. She was probably enjoying it."
"Oh!" Gojo said like he just realized it, "Was that why? Was your pussy growing wet every time we bullied you, little slut?"
"Fuck you." you spat out, both of the men laughing in response.
"Yeah, I bet you wanted us to fuck you." Geto growled into your ear, your shiver not going unnoticed by him, "You're fucking loving this~"
"Why don't we check?" Gojo suggested, cutting off anything you might have said, his hands inching towards your belt, a dangerous gleam in his eyes, "Let's see for ourselves if we made your pussy wet~"
"Gojo-"
"That's a great plan!" Geto interrupted, laughing as he tightened his hold your your neck, making you gasp, "Take those pants off. So baggy and loose- what a waste of a nice ass."
"I agree." Gojo said, finger now running over the metal of your belt, "it hides so much. With what I felt everytime I've spanked you- your pants do you no favors."
"Don't you- fucking dare!" You choked out, face turning slightly red from the lack of air and from Gojo slowly starting to fiddle with your belt.
"Oh, what are you gonna do about it, little slut?" Gojo teased, licking his lips as his long, lithe fingers started to tug at the leather of your belt, "Look at your fucking face- that look in your eyes? You're loving this."
"No- I'm not- fuck-" you sputtered out, failing to convey your frustrations. You couldn't stand these two assholes. Constantly picking on you and thinking they were so high and mighty- treating you like a bug on their path. So smug and narcissistic and not caring about anyone but themselves-
But as much as you'd hate to admit it, you couldn't deny that your body was throbbing. Everytime they bullied you, you felt that heat. Your heart-rate quickened and your pussy would grow wet, leaving you a confused mess every-time you got bullied. When it first happened, you didn't understand what was happening. Through some internet searching, you found those audios and realized you weren't the only one out there.
A masochist with a humiliation kink.
And without them knowing, the two guys you hate were fulfilling those fantasies for you.
Well now, they were more than aware.
"Come on, little bitch~" Geto cooed into your ear, his silky voice making you shudder, "Why settle with these audios when you can experience the real thing?"
"I...I..." you panted, heat rushing to your face and your heart pounding in your chest. You could feel your pussy dampen and had no doubt that if Gojo actually took your pants off, they'd see you be wet and needy.
"Too slow~" Gojo suddenly said, unbuckling your belt in a matter of seconds before ripping it off of you just as fast, throwing it aside. You yelped as you instinctively struggled, Geto laughing behind you as he tightened his hold on you even more, rendering you helpless. Gojo laughed as well, his bright blue eyes peeking from behind his glasses as you could see the gleam of excitement in them.
"You excited, little bitch?" Gojo cooed, licking his lips as his hands started trailing up your leg, running over the fabric of your pants as he inched up higher and higher. Everywhere he touched felt like it was on fire, a rush of heat coursing through you.
"He asked you a question." Geto said, clicking his tongue as you refused to say anything, "Weren't you taught any manners?"
"Fucking- i'll kill you-" you gasped out, face growing redder as you heard Geto's growl of annoyance, feeling the vibration of his chest against your back. "Don't worry about it, Suguru." Gojo said, smirking as he started undoing the buttons of your pants, "We can punish her later for her disrespect. For now, I just want to get at this pussy~"
With a big grin, Gojo ripped your pants off of you in one fell swoop, making you squeal as he tossed it away. You shivered as your bare legs were exposed to the evening air as well as their lecherous stares. You could see Gojo's eyes trail up your legs before zoning in on your clothed pussy, the man letting out a snort as he took in your panties.
"Pink with a bow on? Really?" he joked, "how plain and not sexy."
"I think they're cute." Geto chimed in, also shamelessly staring down at your clothed cunt, "But it doesn't matter. It's not going to be on her for long, anyway."
"True." Gojo said with a nod as he hooked his finger into the waistband of your panties and pulled it out before letting go, allowing the elastic to slap back against you, "but next time, wear something sexier."
"I hate you- so much!" you snarled, face bright red, biting your lower lip as the white haired man looped his fingers back into the waistband of your panties, this time, very obviously wanting to get it off of you. You gasped, unable to stop your shivers as Gojo leaned forward and placed a kiss on your tummy, his tongue peeking out to lick at your skin as he slowly starting pulling your panties down. He laughed as you tried to squiggle out but your movements only made the slide of your panties all the more easier for him.
"Look at that~" Gojo gasped as your cunt got exposed, practically drooling as he stared like a pervert, a twinkle behind his blue eyes, "You might be a weakling but atleast you have a pretty pussy."
"Atleast she's good for something~" Geto teased, shuffling behind you and in that moment, you felt it. Something long, hard and thick pressed up against your back and it didn't take a rocket scientist to figure out what that was. You gulped as you felt the imprint of Geto's cock against you, unable to help yourself as your eyes darted towards the front of Gojo's pants and sure enough: His erection was straining against it.
They were too focused on your cunt to notice where you were looking and you were too focused on their dicks to notice that your panties were now completely off and that Gojo had tossed the fabric aside. Geto immediately hooked his legs over your own before forcefully spreading them apart, leaving you wide and exposed to their perverted gazes. Gojo let out a whistle as he dragged a chair over before sitting on it, his face now right across your bare cunt.
"Fuck- fuck you- fuck you!" you gasped out and cursed, feeling lightheaded from the situation. "How does she look?" Geto asked, both of them ignoring you and you could hear the hunger in his voice and the sensation of his cock twitching against you. "Oh, she's perfect~" Gojo responded and you knew they were referring to your pussy as its own person- somehow giving it more praise and respect than they've ever given you, "And oh so wet~"
"I want to see." Geto demanded, not having the same view as Gojo, "Can't let you have all the fun."
"Sure thing, pal." Gojo said, not taking his eyes off of your pussy as he continued to stare, hand reaching into his pocket to pull out his phone. "Gojo- don't you dare-" You barked out, understanding what he was going to do- but what you hoped sounded aggressive came out soft and subservient. The man simply snorted in response, ignoring your pleas as he opened up his phone camera and started taking pictures of your pussy. You shut your eyes and squealed everytime you heard the shutter of the camera, trembling body still held tightly in Geto's arms.
"Her hole clenches every-time I take a picture~" Gojo cooed, bringing a hand up to thumb at your pussy lips before spreading them apart even more, making your back arch against Geto, "And look at this little clit! So fucking cute!"
"Just show it to me already!" Geto snarled, impatient. "Alright, alright." Gojo responded with a roll of his eyes, standing up before turning the phone towards the two of you, a shot of your spread pussy on screen. You turned your head away and closed your eyes, ears ringing at how humiliated you felt-
and pussy dripping at how good it was.
"Oh, she does look delicious!" Geto praised, gripping your chin as he forced you to turn your head back towards the phone, making you look at the picture, "You have such a pretty cunt and you hid it from us for so long?"
You whined cutely as you looked at the picture- a closeup shot of your spread cunt with a clear view of your clit and hole, your cunt glistening with slick.
"Seriously!" Gojo barked as he started swiping, showing off the various photos of your pussy that were now in his possession, "If we knew all you wanted was some fucking, we'd have pounded this pussy ages ago! I've always wanted a sex toy."
"Don't you have like a dozen already?"
"Yeah, but I'm sure this bitch's cunt will feel way better than some silicone~"
"I hate you-" you gasped out, any and all fight leaving your bones (not that there was much to begin with) as you leaned your head against Geto's shoulder, "I hate you both- so much-"
"Yeah?" Geto asked, the tone in his voice clearly indicating that he wasn't taking you seriously, "Well, this pussy says otherwise."
He let go of your chin and snaked his hand down quickly to cup your pussy, making you yelp. You didn't know if what you felt was shame or relief that there was finally a hand on your cunt- finally some friction against your dripping womanhood. You tossed your head back, eyebrows furrowed and lip trapped under your teeth as Geto's long fingers started gliding through your pussy lips. The slick sound of him rubbing circles over your hole and collecting your wetness echoed through the room, the sound making your ears burn and your chest feel like it was on fire.
This is was so...so...
so fucking fun...
"She's loving this~" Gojo predicted accurately, eyes darting between your blissful expression and Geto's fingers toying with your body, "Fucking whore- slutty bitch- oh, we are going to have fun with you~"
"Her pussy is growing wetter by the second." Geto noted, cock fully erect and throbbing against you, his other arm slowly letting go of the hold around your neck, confident that you were going to stay right there like a good little girl. You gasped as the head spinning pressure was finally off of you, taking in a few deep breaths but choking on it just as quickly as the man started using his slick covered fingers to run circles over your clit.
"You're dripping all over the table, little bitch~" Gojo teased, taking a couple more pictures before pocketing it, "Fuck- let me feel too- or- actually-"
He sat back on the chair, pulling it closer before gripping your thighs, an eager grin on his face:
"I'm gonna eat~"
"Get used to this, little bitch." Geto growled into your ear, pulling his hand away from your cunt and snickering at your whine of disappointment, "You're our toy now and we are going to do whatever we want to you, understand?"
His hands came upto your chest, lithe fingers starting to undo the buttons of your shirt one by one, revealing a patch of skin before the peeks of your bra. Gojo licked his lips and moved forward, his hot breath fanning against your slick cunt.
"Whatever. We. Want."
3K notes · View notes
myownwholewildworld · 6 months ago
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THE WAY TO A GREAT WIDE SOMEWHERE
↪ a the mandalorian x beauty & the beast crossover
main masterlist | read on ao3 | easter eggs pairing: beast!din djarin x f!reader. summary: cursed to spend the rest of his days in Mand'alor, Din Djarin faces a threat that may break his peace: you. -or- a retelling of the beauty and the beast story. a/n: HAHAHA *manic laugh* HI! this has been a long time coming now. first and foremost, i'll start by saying that this whole brainrot was inspired by this beautiful moodboard by the very talented @almostfoxglove, please go see it because it's the main reason i wrote this fic. i have gone crazy trying to link both worlds so i hope some of you see/understand the easter eggs. feel free to come screech at me if you like it because i have been screaming into the abyss for weeks now. love you all, take care! <3 x warnings/tags (beware spoilers): 18+, mdni. set after the events of S2. grogu is BRIEFLY mentioned. if you're a SW purist, this ain't your fic, my friend. the stockholm syndrome is stockholming. beast!din. a fair bit of smut (you know all the usual warnings). sensory deprivation. kinda dom!din. monster fucking (this is a BATB crossover after all, sorry). death of a secondary character. reader is a blank slate. alternating pov. no use of y/n. italics means it's spoken in mando'a OR it's the beast's pov 👀 THIS IS THE WAY. w/c: ~24.3k. (HAHA SORRY) divider by @saradika-graphics taglist at the end 💖
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11 ABY
“Take it with you. Don’t let anyone hav―” your father choked on his last words, a chesty cough wreaking havoc in his damp, bloody lungs. “It’ll take you to where you need to go. Find it. And destroy it,” he muttered as his grey eyes, crowned by bushy, white brows, bore into yours.
In your hands you held the device that had been passed down every generation in your family. It had been commissioned by Tarre Vizsla himself over a thousand years ago when he created the Darksaber ― a Pillio star compass to find not a physical location but his most valuable possession. For almost a millennium, your family had been the guardians of it.
And for as many centuries, your Jedi ancestors had been looking for the Darksaber after they had stolen the star compass from Vizsla. That Jedi blood was far too diluted now, just a remnant of what your family once was since none of you seemed to be Force sensitive. But the mission remained despite the passing of time, not so much the reason behind it.
Since your birth, this was all you knew: the thrill of the chase. Never settling down anywhere, never creating bonds with anyone outside of your tribe. You all were wanderers ― nomads who made home of no world. You knew no other life. It was what it was.
The Jedi star compass fit perfectly on the palm of your hand ― it was circular and slightly bigger than a locket. This one though was different, special even, because it was made of beskar, a metal alloy from Mandalore.
Your fingers caressed the lid, tracing the astromeridian lines with the tips, feeling each groove. Undoing the aurodium clasp, you opened the compass to find a plasma-encased supraluminite lodestone, perfectly centred. The plasma in this specific one, however, was not of a shimmering blue, but a deep, stagnant black. Its magnetism was so strong it buzzed, emitting a low vibrating noise.
You tapped the stone with your thumb, and the vibration pierced through your flesh and bone, travelling up your forearm and dissipating into your body before it reached your chest. You quickly removed your thumb, taken aback by the intensity of it all, eyes slightly widened.
“But father, you heard them. It’s already been destroyed. It’s over,” you whispered, tears trespassing the waterline of your tired eyes.
“They lie. Never trust one of them. Those power-thirsty ra―,” he coughed, pressing the wound that stained his clothing to stop the bleeding. You covered his hand with one of yours, the other still holding the compass. “I know we were close, we had to be. Promise me you’ll keep looking.”
“I promise, father,” you hushed, repressing the sob that threatened to tear your throat.
You laced your hand with his, unbothered by the blood, as you watched his eyes become dull, opaque and dead. His lungs exhaled the last breath while the grip of his hand on yours loosened.
You remained there for a few minutes, pain and grief gnawing at you, knelt by his deathbed, tinkering with the Pillio star compass. With your mother taken from you at childbirth and now your father perishing to an enemy, you had no blood relatives left. You were alone, stripped from the comfort of family.
You still had your tribe, but your connection to them was circumstantial. You grew up in their midst, but always felt like an outsider, a misfit who people felt forced to interact with because you were “the daughter of.”
It didn’t matter anyway.
You might not have known why your family kept on looking for the Darksaber, but now you knew why you had to search for it. It was your father’s last wish and that was enough reason for you.
“We must go,” Ashton’s voice reached your ears, but not your brain.
When you didn’t respond, he slowly approached you, kneeling by your side.
“Hey, I know this is hard, but we are really running out of time,” his firm arm wrapped around your waist to help you stand up.
Your knees trembled like a newborn qartuum but managed to stay upright on the soles of your feet. Taking a deep breath, you nodded.
“We need to leave Nevarro. It’s just a matter of time until our covert is discovered. They’ll come looking for him,” your head tilted in your father’s direction, voice flat and emotionless now. Stretching your back, you put distance between you and Ashton. “You find somewhere safe in the Outer Rim to lay low for a while. I need to see this done once and for all.”
“This what, exactly? You heard the same thing I did. Gideon crushed it. It’s over. We can finally live our own lives, find a home, settle down,” he muttered, a gloved hand looking for yours yet not finding it. He sounded so hopeful.
“I know what we heard. But my father… he thinks― thought it may be a ruse. I have to try, Ash. I can’t just leave this life behind, as if everything I’ve done has meant absolutely nothing,” you replied between gritted teeth, frustrated.
“Don’t waste any more years of your life on a wild goose chase, please. Let’s go back to the others. We can―” his hand finally found yours, lacing your fingers.
You looked down at your intertwined hands. It just felt odd, out of place even. Ashton was nothing more than a brother in arms to you.
You shook your head no, pulling your hand from his, breaking the contact, and looked at him directly in the eyes.
“No, Ash. There’s no “we” here. You do what you must, and so will I, simple as,” you rejected the unspoken offer, seeing the hurt consuming his blue eyes.
“What makes you think you can do this alone? Thousands of people have tried for centuries,” he quickly tried a different tactic, but his reproach unfazed you. “Let me come with you at least.”
“No. Our people need you to lead them into this new lifestyle, Ashton,” you refused, not even giving his proposal a second thought. “And you just made it clear, this is not the life you want, but it’s the one I do. Now go.”
Ashton pressed his lips together in frustration, gobsmacked by your bluntness. He’ll be fine, he’ll recover, you thought to yourself when you saw the pain of your rejection finally dawning on him.
“Have it your way then,” and with that, he left.
The compass weighed heavy on your hand and in your heart. But you couldn’t afford distractions nor being delayed by people. Not this time.
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19 ABY
Weeks turned into months. And months into years. Eight, to be exact.
The passage of time was unfaltering, but so was your determination. Despite the many dead ends, the several disappointments and the near misses, you never stopped looking for the Darksaber.
There were days, however, that it all felt like an impossible task, that you truly believed that Moff Gideon had destroyed it. You couldn’t accept it though, not when you had spent eight more years hunting it down. It still had to exist. Right?
It was hard keeping the spirits up with no company to hear you vent your frustration. You had started talking out loud to yourself, your voice bouncing off the metal walls of your spacecraft.
Some days you regretted rejecting Ashton’s offer. The man had been nothing but kind to you, loyal too. You had your suspicions about his true intentions, but you never really saw him as anything more than a friend. You hoped that after all this time, he would have found someone who reciprocated him. Ash was a good man and deserved better than what you could have offered him. What you both wanted were two completely different things, incompatible ― he wanted a quiet life, you had preferred an adventurous one.
Given the same option today, however, you were not so sure of what you would have chosen.
Toying with the star compass, you looked through the windshield of the cockpit. Jumping through hyperspace at the speed of light always put you at ease ― the flashing of light as you passed through it left a rainbow of blue hues. The static noise was so calming, you relaxed into your seat.
Your attention returned to the device on your hand. Opening it again, you eagerly watched the metal semicircle twinkle, reflecting off the colours from the Hydian Way. It had not moved for a while, so you had set the course in the direction it pointed towards.
Unsure of the way it was taking you to, you had learnt to just let it take you where it pleased. Like a bantha following its herd on the vast, arid lands of Tatooine, your life for the past eight years had been reduced to following the hands of the star compass, and nothing else. And now, like every single time before, you would wind up in the middle of the great wide somewhere. Or nowhere.
Even if your eyes hadn’t been lazily transfixed on the lodestone, you could not have missed the louder buzzing it was emitting. You rapidly sat up on your seat, your thumb hovering over the stone while your heart jolted up to your throat. As the humming increased, the black plasma inside swirled and radiated a white, shimmering glow.
Only once had you seen it do something like that before, right before finding out that the Darksaber was supposedly destroyed by Gideon. You thought yourself so close to your objective in a stroke of sheer luck, you all had rushed towards the direction it marked and found absolutely nothing.
With blood drumming in your eardrums and heartrate spiking, you faced the panel of your starfighter and touched a few buttons in a trained dance of movements. Then you pulled a lever, and a sudden jerking motion stopped the spaceship on its tracks, easing out of hyperspace.
Back flattened against the back of your padded seat, you squinted your eyes to see where you were. It took you a good moment to recognise the worlds in front of you. But that couldn’t be, made no sense at all. Furrowing your brows, you looked down at the scope in front of you.
No, you were not mistaken. That was Mandalore and one of its moons, Concordia. The compass was vibrating so loud now, you had to close the lid to contain it. Did a double take on the scope, then back out to space.
You knew the story of what had happened here fifteen years ago ― Mandalore had become uninhabitable after the Night of the Thousand Tears. The Empire had made sure of it by brute force and unfair use of fusion bombs and rays, which reportedly left the surface of the planet crystallised and its atmosphere poisoned. No one who had ventured had ever returned, or so the legend went.
The compass hummed louder, still pressed between your hands, as if compelling you to decide, and to do it now. It couldn’t be that the Darksaber had found its way back to its homeworld. It completely defied common sense, the laws of space itself.
Concordia, on the other hand, was more promising, you thought. The best choice out of the worst possible options. Safest too. Probably.
Setting course towards the moon, the spacecraft slowly trudged forward. A loud sputtering sound coming from the thrusters almost made you jump, quickly followed by the incessant beeping sound of an alarm.
“Thrusters stabilizers compromised. Negative power couplers overheating,” the robotic, monotonous voice advised you.
Then your astromech droid, a yellow trimmed R3-D3 unit, started screeching so loud through your headset, you had to remove them.
“Fuck!” you exclaimed, taking complete manual control of the helm.
If the couplers didn’t cool down, you only had minutes until these completely overheated, causing an explosion.
Weighing your options, you let go of an expletive. Mandalore was closer, but you feared that the moment you entered its atmosphere, your starfighter, and you inside it, would combust to death. Concordia was further, which meant the possibility of exploding before reaching it was very high.
You were fucked either way. Both were evils, none the lesser.
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“Alor (boss), something has entered the atmosphere,” Nau’ul, his protocol droid, announced in perfect Mando’a, with a metal finger pointing out the window.
Din’s brows knitted together, not that anyone could see with his helmet on. His attention drifted to the direction Nau’ul was indicating. The wrinkles between his eyes pronounced as his head tilted.
A small spaceship had breached the atmosphere of Mand’alor, appearing through the greyish clouds with a burning tail following it as it rapidly plummeted towards the surface, leaving a smoky halo behind.
With muscles tensed, Din got up from the chair and walked to the floor-to-ceiling window, trying to catch a better glimpse of the type of aircraft that dared to break his peace.
It couldn’t be the New Republic, and he hoped to hell it wasn’t an Imperial ship either. Everyone thought Mand’alor was a thing of the past, a barren planet harbouring no life.
He had thought so too before finding himself adrift in space, injured within inches of his own death. Crippled as he was, his Razor Crest survived the bumpy ride and even bumpier landing, all thanks to the droids aboard. The same droids that had managed to nurse him back to health. Or, close to, anyway.
Through the visor of his damaged helmet, Din eagerly saw the spaceship disappear between the dense foliage and slab stones, nearby the Mines. He waited and hoped to see a column of dense smoke towering above the vegetation, but that vision never materialised. There had been no crash, at least not a major one. Which meant that, whoever was commandeering the ship, had probably survived.
“Fuck. Where’s Mrs. Kri’gee?” he turned around to face Nau’ul.
The protocol droid lifted his arms above his head, running towards the door, panicking.
“Mrs. Kri’gee! Mrs. Kri’gee! Where are you? You’re urgently needed! Report immediately!” the high pitch tone of his robotic voice almost pierced his eardrum.
Din stuck a gloved fingertip in his ear canal and wiggled it to ease the pressure building up in there. Nau’ul was too dramatic and too loud for being a mere droid.
He had not even turned the corner into the main hallway of his decrepit abode, that Mrs. Kri’gee appeared in front of them. Nau’ul got the jumpscare of his life, one of his hands landing on the metal breast piece where a heart should be had he been truly human.
“Mrs. Kri’gee reporting, jatne vod (sir),” replied the IG-series assassin droid, one of her hands flying to her temple to salute him. “How can I be of service?”
“We seem to have visitors. Follow me, gedet’ye (please),” and with no further ado, Din walked almost blindly through the maze of corridors, then down the lift, until the cold breeze greeted him.
The temperature outside was almost freezing, especially in winter. This winter was chillier than usual too, so Din and his droids only came out when it was strictly necessary. Even after all this time, it still surprised him how glacial it was out there. With not even a tiny patch of skin uncovered, Din could still feel the biting cold clinging onto his beskar armour, seeping in through the smallest nook it could find. It could clutch around the bones easily, freezing you in place in a matter of minutes.
Not that he could tell the difference anyway, considering how fucking cold he felt under his skin. How icy it was inside of him, a never-ending snowstorm waging war on his numb heart.
Perhaps he shouldn’t hurry ― if he slowed down enough, and with a bit of luck, the unwanted guests might perish to the unforgiving cold of wintery Mand’alor.
With Mrs. Kri’gee on his heels, Din moved through the terrain as if he was one with it. After many years, he knew the topography as if it was the palm of his hand. Where he could step and where he couldn’t. What paths to avoid at specific times, and which ones were safe to hike, always mindful of the creatures who had withstood the Great Purge.
He might not have many things, but free time was definitely one of them, which allowed him to explore this world he had called home for the last eight years. There weren’t many pastimes in Mand’alor when he was the only human inhabiting it. Maybe that was why he had renamed the droids with more human-like names, to feel less lonely ― only if he could truly feel something.
The emptiness within him had only grown with every passing year on the planet. The curse that ran through his veins had slowly overtaken him, leaving an ever-growing void in his chest. Din could not remember the last time he felt anything ― joy, contempt, happiness, anger, hope, despair. Nothing.
He was an empty carcass, a non-sentient monster merely existing. Sometimes he wondered what the point of it all was, not because of an emotional response but because of pure boredom. But then his eyes would fall on the source of his misfortune, a brutal reminder of how he came to be where he stood, and the lingering questions would vanish. This was the way, his way.
And if that wasn’t enough, he also had to deal with the other side of the coin.
Din trudged along the faded path, now overridden by vegetation, to the Mines. His magnetised boots helped him find his footing more than once, sharp and loose rocks making it difficult to remain vertical. Mrs. Kri’gee, on the other hand, had no issues whatsoever.
Fifteen minutes later, they reached their destination near the Mines, close to a cliff. The lush bushes and thick trees blocked the sight at first, but Din found the perfect spot to stalk the unwelcomed visitors. Down on his knees and through a gap between the leaves, he made out the shape of a T-65B X-wing starfighter ― a pretty old one, at least twenty years old. It could have well served during the Galactic Civil War.
The starfighter could only carry the pilot and an astromech droid, which meant he only had to deal with one sentient being. Could have been worse, Din thought. The prospect of being found didn’t sit well with him though, unsure of why this person had found themselves stranded in Mand’alor, out of all the fucking planets in the Outer Rim.
The Mandalorian tilted his head, trying to get a better look at the person on the other side of the ship ― they were sat on a flat rock with their back towards him, knees propped up, elbows placed on them and crouched forwards. Din stuck his head out just enough to look over their shoulder, good eye squinting ― there was an astromech droid lying in front of them. By the looks of it, it had been fried to death, still sparkling and smoking a little.
Mrs. Kri’gee laid low behind him, still but ready to accept a command. Din waved a couple of signs to the IG-series assassin droid, and it moved silently, gracefully as a loth-cat, to reposition itself northwards, facing the target.
The Mandalorian kept his fist closed, indicating Mrs. Kri’gee to wait, when he saw the person standing up, removing their helmet and taking in a deep, exaggerated breath. It was the side profile of a woman in a bright orange spacesuit, human as far as he could tell. Din’s eyebrows furrowed under the visor, confused as to what could possibly have guided her to this inhospitable planet.
Perhaps he had been alone for too long, only the droids keeping him company for almost a decade, but the sight of you unsettled him. Had he been able to feel something, he was sure an uncomfortable weight would have grounded his stomach.
Kaysh cuyi mesh’la (she is beautiful), he thought ― a simple, objective observation a man could make with only half a vision.
Your hair shined even when the sky was gloomy; your big, bright eyes sparked with frustration; your plump lips fell into a flat line before smacking them with disapproval at your wasted andromech droid. Your fingers curled into your hips while one of your feet tapped the crystallised ground underneath nervously.
“Well, I’m not dead yet, so I guess the air is breathable,” you talked to yourself out loud, sounding almost disappointed. “Stinks like a swamp though, ugh.”
That was a good observation from your part. Stupid, but good. What was your plan if it wasn’t? Suffocating to death? Bit reckless if you asked him. And yes, the sulfuric smell coming off a bog nearby was not great, but there were worse places in Mand’alor to find yourself in. He knew damn well.
He eyed you for a little longer, Mrs. Kri’gee lying in wait. He didn’t need to kill you yet, first he needed to find out why you were here and if you were part of a larger group ― if there was a remote possibility of someone looking for you, he had to know.
Din signalled to Mrs. Kri’gee to come out of hiding but to not attack yet. And so she did promptly. The droid walked out in front of you, startling you so bad you almost fell backwards.
“Identify yourself,” his droid asked you.
You snorted, hand slowly moving backwards towards the blaster pistol in your holster.
“You identify yourself, you little piece of― metal,” you bit your tongue back.
“Nicknamed Mrs. Kri’gee by my Alor. IG-11 assassin droid. Serial Number 730X21G. Manufactured by Holowan Mechanicals in 1 ABY. First assigned to―”
“Alright, alright. Whatever,” you scoffed, fingers curling around the grip of your gun. “What is a droid like you doing here anyway?”
While you were distracted chatting to Mrs. Kri’gee, Din had come out of his hiding place, heavy boulder on hand. Stealthy as a predator, he raised his arm above your head and smashed the rock against your skull with no hesitation at all.
You plummeted to the ground instantly, rendered unconscious in a split second. Towering above you, Din walked around your body and crouched down in front of you. His gloved fingers moved a few strands of silky hair out of the way, following the tiny stream of blood dripping down your temple. The wound wasn’t too bad ― he was sure you’d survive the blow.
“Pick her up,” he commanded the droid, who willingly complied.
In a matter of seconds, Mrs. Kri’gee was carrying you over the shoulder, as if you were a light sack full of gloomroots.
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What a banging headache. You were barely able to string two thoughts together.
Eyelids heavy, you did your best to open your eyes. It took you a couple of attempts, but you finally got there. Vision still burry, your pupils widened to adapt to the darkness surrounding you.
The room you were in was all rough, square edges. It reminded you od the inside of a spacecraft with all those panels on the walls. Here though, the cables were hanging out of the electrical panels, snapped and peeled. The scarce futuristic, metal furniture dotted around was broken and upside down everywhere ― the whole space was derelict, abandoned.
It has to be, because this is Mandalore, you suddenly remembered where you were before you lost consciousness. And how did you faint, anyway? How did you get here? Was it the freaking droid?
With a pitiful groan, you tried to reach the back of your head, where the pain was radiating from. To your dismay, your hand didn’t budge one inch. Confused, you looked down and around you, only to find a sturdy syntherope tethering you to the chair you were sitting on.
“What the varp!” You exclaimed, fighting the fetters to no avail.
You rubbed your hands together in the hopes to loosen the grip and slide one hand out, but whoever bound you, had tightened the rope really well. Did that stop you though? No, not one bit. You tried and tried and tried until the skin on your wrists was raw.
You were in the middle of attempting to break free when the creaking noise of the door made you still in place, half hoping to see the assassin droid.
Instead, a Mandalorian walked into the room, and you immediately ceased your endeavours. With a droid you could deal, but with a sentient being… and even worse, a Mandalorian out of all the fucking possibilities.
By the shape of his armour and predatory gait, you could tell he was a man, around five feet twelve. He wore a black body stocking covered by different metal pieces ― vambraces, shoulder pauldrons, breastplate, thigh and shin guards, and kneepads were all made of unaltered beskar. The shiny patina indicated that the alloy had been polished but not painted, as most Mandalorians would have them.
But what struck you as odd was his helmet. Manufactured with the same polished beskar, a black visor protecting his eyesight, you noticed the big crack that ran diagonally from the bottom left, all the way to his right temple. The transparisteel of the visor had also been damaged. It all had been welded back together, albeit by a novice hand.
You stiffened your back as he approached without exchanging one word. Your gaze followed his every movement, wary of the man in front of you. Your tribe instilled on all its members a gut-churning hatred for Mandalorians, although such strong feeling never really deepened within you.
Always mouthing your curiosity, your constant questions as a child were never well received by your tutors. Even your father had a hard time convincing you to hate someone irrationally. It just wasn’t in your nature to hate for the sake of it.
However, the Mandalorian in front of you… well, that was a slightly different story. The bastard had kidnapped you and had the guts to stop in front of you, arms folded, and head tilted. As if you just happened to be there, disturbing his peace.
“Release me now,” you demanded, narrowing your eyes as you leaned forward on your chair. “I’ve done nothing wrong.”
A stony silence ensued, leaving you wondering if he was mute.
“Why are you here?” His voice was distorted by the speech scrambler integrated in his helmet.
Repressing a taunting jeer, you stared him right in his eyes ― where you assumed they were, anyway. When he didn’t respond, your eyebrows scowled.
“Are you, like, for real, man?” You couldn’t hide your incredulity. “It’s obvious I don’t want to be here. I didn’t mean to land on this forsaken planet. For all I knew I was about to die, I thought it was uninhabitable! I actually meant to go to Condordia―”
“Why would you go to Concordia? You’re not Mandalorian. Obviously,” he interrupted you, his hand waving up and down in front of you almost scornfully, pointing out your plain clothing.
“I― Well, that’s none of your business, actually. Look― Sorry, what’s your name? I didn’t catch it before you kidnapped me,” you asked with a pinch of rancour tarnishing your voice.
“I haven’t kidnapped you,” he quickly replied defensively. “Just Mando.”
“Okay, Just Mando. Look, you let me go and we both can pretend none of this ever happened. I go on my merry way and you― well, you stay here, doing whatever it is you do,” coming to think of it, you also had questions. You cocked your head, “What are you doing here anyway? When did Mandalore’s atmosphere become breathable again? I thought the planet was completely ruined after the Great Purge.”
“For considering yourself a hostage, you sure ask too many questions. And it’s none of your business, actually,” he snapped back throwing your own words at you with a snarky edge to his voice. “You and the whole universe think Mand’alor is unliveable, and it will remain like that for as long as I live, at least,” his tone turned sombre. “You ain’t going anywhere, I’m afraid.”
His last words shocked you. What did he mean you were not going anywhere? Of course you were. You couldn’t stay here; you had a mission to complete. And Just Mando didn’t seem to be the best company either, the man was so dispassionate you were sure he had a pole up his ass.
“Wait, wait, hold on one varping second. Let’s not rush into making stupid decisions, shall we? I get it, you want to be left alone for all eternity, don’t want anyone to disturb you. I won’t tell a soul you’re here, I give you my word,” you stumbled over your words, panicking at the perspective of not leaving this planet. “Please, I can’t― There are people looking for me,” you lied.
You had not been in touch with your tribe for weeks now. And by tribe, you meant Ash. He was the only one you had been communicating with over the last eight years. Life had been hectic, and you were never the best at keeping in touch.
“Then I’ll kill them if they come looking,” he shrugged, matter-of-factly.
“Wow, okay. Calm down. No need to threaten my people,” you tried to diffuse the situation, although Just Mando seemed pretty calm.
“And just so you know, I’ve just come back from where you landed. I’ve destroyed your engine and the navigation console, so you ain’t going nowhere,” he unfolded his arms, lacing his gloved fingers on his back, quite the measured gesture.
You glanced up at him incredulous, mouth agape while your lungs emptied. You were stranded here, forever, with him. The magnitude of his words had still not dawned on you, when a faster thought made its way through to the surface.
The star compass. Had he found it? Had he destroyed it too? Not that it would be useful here, but it was the last memento you had of your late father. Not that you could ask, anyway.
“Why… why would you do that?” Your trembling voice almost gave way to desperation as you leaned back against the chair.
You blinked fast to tame your feelings, all bravado leaving your body soft and boneless. For once you were speechless, your eyes searching for his under the damaged visor. But you only saw your reflection on the transparisteel, his pose not budging at all.
“Please, Mando. Tell me you’re lying. Tell me my X-wing was not the only way out of this forlorn planet?” You begged, a dense knot forming in your throat, collapsing your airway.
“It is. It was,” he corrected himself. “I can’t let you leave. I don’t trust you nor your word. This way, I make sure you have no other option than staying here for as long as you live. Death is the only way out of here.”
You deflated on the chair, looking at him in disbelief, almost unable to breathe. Although his voice was warped by the modulator, there was no emotion in it. He spoke as if talking about the damn weather, not like he had just clipped your wings forever ― literally.
“I― What… Why are you behaving like a fucking monster? Don’t you have feelings?” There was no edge to your question, you were past subtleties now.
He shrugged again, unbothered.
“‘Cause I am. And I don’t,” was his cryptic answer before turning on his heels and leaving you alone with your thoughts.
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The door slammed behind him a bit too forcefully for his liking ― a reminder that he would need to ask Ca’nara to grease the hinges. Din then put the latch down to ensure the door could not be opened from the inside.
Without another thought in his mind, he turned around and almost crashed into Nau’ul.
“Master?” asked the protocol droid, dubious, one finger lifted in the air to draw his attention.
“What?” he replied, exasperated. Din just wanted a moment alone ― that conversation had burnt the last energy he had reserved for socialising. If it wasn’t because he could harbour no feelings, one could say he was socially drained already.
“Since the girl is going to be with us for quite some time, I was thinking that you might want to offer her a more comfortable room…” Nau’ul suggested.
The damn droid was more human than he was. Din had not even thought about moving you a different place within his derelict fortress. He had made the once royal prison his home, suspended off the ceiling of Sundari’s bio-dome, or what remained of it. A suitable place for a worthy character like him.
Din just stared at him, weighing his words. Did he have to care about the needs of his captive? She’s not my captive, just a… lifelong visitor, he quickly corrected himself.
“Then again, maybe not,” Nau’ul quickly retracted, dropping his hand to one side, mistaking his silence.
Fuck, I should have thought that, not the droid, he almost reprimanded himself. After so many years in his self-imposed exile, Din had really lost all touch with his humanity. Solitude, along with the curse that plagued his veins, were to blame.
With a grunt, he turned on his heels, unbolted the door and walked right back in, coming to a halt behind you with just a few strides.
“What are you doing?” you asked in a small voice, sniffling.
You had been crying and were now trying to hide it, show him you were unbreakable. He should have felt like a dick but didn’t. Couldn’t, really.
He knelt behind you and removed his vibro-knife from one of his pockets. The blade hummed, vibrating, when it got activated and Din cut you loose, restoring the blood flow to your hands.
“I’ll show you to your room,” was his only explanation to your question.
“My room? But I thought…” the doubt in your words slightly angered him. A fleeting feeling.
Anger? That’s new, he thought, eyebrows momentarily furrowing under the helmet.
“You wanna― you wanna stay here?” he muttered, teeth almost gritting.
“No,” you hushed, wide eyes looking up at him when he walked around the chair to face you.
Unsettling.
“Then follow me.”
Turning on his heels, Din made his way to the door, hoping you would follow. And you did, possibly because you had nowhere else to go.
The royal prison was a cross-shaped structure with several floors. Most of it was completely abandoned, except for the last two levels where he had accommodated himself in this senseless life he lived. The height gave him vantage point, with a good view of the surrounding buildings and further afield.
If it was for him, he would live between wreckage and filth, but his droids had made it their purpose to make the prison somewhat liveable. Not that he cared.
Din looked over his shoulder for one second to see you rub your wrists, eyes focused on the floor. Red lines were imprinted on your skin and for a brief second, he wondered if he had secured the syntherope a bit too tight.
Oh well.
He walked you all the way through a maze of corridors until you reached an elevator which was already waiting to take you up. Din stepped in and then to a side ― it wasn’t too big, but there was enough room for the both of you without having to invade each other’s personal space. You reluctantly followed.
The minutes dragged; the silence heavy although he did not find it unbearable. By the way you fidgeted with your fingers, he knew you did. Despite your discomfort, Mando did not open his mouth ― better getting used to it now, he didn’t want you to think he was the talkative type.
Then a ding announced your arrival to the top floor, and you almost let go of a relieved sigh. Din glanced at you sideways but didn’t catch much of your expression ― you were on his righthand side, and his right eye was completely blind.
The floor was well illuminated, clean and free of debris. It was well looked after, pristine almost. The corridors were empty, giving the whole place a very diaphanous appearance. As you walked by his side, he pointed out a few rooms you might want to make use of.
Arriving at an intersection, Din took the east corridor, ignoring the opposite one deliberately.
“What’s on that corridor?” you asked curiously.
You were too damn perceptive. Too perceptive for your own good.
“The west wing is forbidden,” he grunted abruptly, a growl even, stopping in his tracks to face you. “Forbidden,” he repeated slowly so the words, and the threat in his modulated voice, would sink in.
His reaction took you aback, but he could see you subduing your fear. You would not let him see it ― how scared you really were. You might not want to show it, but he could sense it.
The thought of you sniffing around the west corridor should make him panic, but his reaction was a mechanical one ― once upon a time, he would have cared excessively, worryingly even, if you discovered what he was hiding. Now, however, it wasn’t that he didn’t care but couldn’t.
The reason behind it, the reason why his emotions had become sterile and why a beast lurked beneath his skin, was stashed away in the west wing.
And it was his life mission to prevent anyone from finding it.
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When Just Mando opened the door to your new cell, you were pleasantly surprised to discover it was an actual bedroom. The walls were still polished stainless steel slabs, so it wasn’t the coziest place ever, but it had a double bed with fresh linen, a nightstand, a wardrobe, a chest and one single chair. Everything was immaculate white, not one speck of dust in sight. There was another door that you assumed would lead to an ensuite bathroom.
You entered the small room and walked towards the bed. Opened the drawers of the furniture not really hoping for anything, so your eyebrows furrowed when you discovered they were packed full with clothes. Weird, but good.
With a little jump you sat down on the bed, testing its springs and overall comfortability. It was strikingly soft and smooth like a cloud, beckoning you to lie flat on your back and drift away to your dreams. You were not expecting that ― seeing how the rest of this floor was decorated (it wasn’t), you thought there would be one single spartan bed which would be hard as ironstone.
You were even amazed to see a floor-to-ceiling window. An actual, big, massive window that faced the outside world. And there were no metal bars covering it. Incredible, really, that he would trust you with one. Not that you were planning to escape, considering how desolate the planet was ― where could you go? Nowhere.
Looking up, you saw Just Mando leaning against the doorframe, arms folded while his biceps flexed against the fabric of his body stocking. He had been watching you the whole time you were inspecting the room.
Suddenly you felt the weight of his eyes on you and that made you feel skittish. You couldn’t see them, but you knew his sight would be intense, drilling and thrilling. What did he look like under that helmet? Would his expression be as impassible as his tone? Did he really not care at all or was that a façade he could afford because you couldn’t dissect his face?
“So… can I come out of my room? Or are you going to lock it too?” you asked tentatively, hands laced on your lap, challenging him with the soft curve of your raised eyebrow.
“It’ll stay locked until I know you can be trusted with freedom,” he straightened his back, hand on the doorknob.
“You call this freedom? Wow, okay,” you paused, letting that spoken thought sink in. “Is it because I asked about that corridor?”
Just Mando stilled under the doorframe, head cocked. Unknowingly, you bit your bottom lip, your teeth massaging the plump pillow underneath.
He didn’t answer.
You had had enough years of silence, the quietness of your cockpit being your only companion. Only broken by the fleeting moments when you met civilisation, you had unintentionally craved that connection. You just hadn’t realised it until you were faced with the possibility of being accompanied by someone for the rest of your life.
Even if that someone was… well, him. Guessed you would have to make do.
“You’ve already condemned me to live here with you, Just Mando, for-fucking-ever. You’ve destroyed my ship, so it’s not like I can go anywhere, can I?” you pleaded with him. “This whole planet is already my personal jail, don’t make it even smaller or I’ll go crazy.”
In your begging, you had gotten up and cut the distance between you. The tips of your shoes bumped into his weathered, leathered boots. He didn’t move, not even one inch ― completely unbothered by your proximity. Your face was so close to his helmet, the steam of your breath almost fogged up the transparisteel of the visor.
And, for a second, he seemed to consider your petition. Or so you had liked to think. You measured each other up, no one giving in or up.
“Until you can be trusted,” Just Mando remarked. The Mandalorian was the first to finally retreat, taking a step back into the hallway. “It’s up to you how long that takes.”
Flabbergasted, you looked at him in disbelief.
And then he shut the door. The click of the lock quickly followed.
Hours had gone by until you heard the door unbolt.
A different droid, an astromech one, greeted you.
“Beep boop, beep!” it happily chirped.
Luckily you knew enough Binary to unsderstand that it said, “dinner is served”.
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“I don’t get it. I’ve already had dinner. Don’t need to be here,” Din complained, arms crossed at chest level, manspreading on a chair in the dining room.
“Try to be understanding, sir. The girl has lost her freedom,” Mrs. Kri’gee almost reprimanded him.
“Least you could do is keep her some company, Alor,” Nau’ul chipped in.
Din scoffed, irritated. And such irritation surprised him. He shouldn’t feel anything but a void in his entrails.
Nau’ul picked up on his unusual display of feelings as quick as he did.
“Master… Have you thought that perhaps this girl could help you break the spell?” the protocol droid ventured, almost stammering towards the end when Din snapped his head back to look at him.
If looks could kill, Nau’ul would have dropped dead.
“Fucking nonsense. You heard the witch, the spell she cast,” Din muttered, jaw so clenched it almost hurt him. “Stop looking for solutions and just accept it. After eight years, you should have already giving up your futile hopes.”
“Someone has to keep the spirits up around here. Depressing enough as it is,” the droid retorted.
“If you allow me, Master, Elsbeth’s exact words were, ‘until you find your maker once more’, and that is up to interpretation,” Mrs. Kri’gee added.
Din remembered very well the cursed that Morgan had spitted in his face before he took possession of the Darksaber and sunk it in the witch’s belly.
I condemn you, Din Djarin, to an eternity of loss, Of emptiness, apathy and thorns. At full moons you will be at your worst, With nobody to keep you warm. You shall walk this Galaxy alone, Until you meet your Maker once more.
They still resonated inside his head, clear as the pale ale in the jug in front of him.
“It dims more and more every day, Alor. The Darksaber is losing its glow. You’ve been ignoring it for years, but I fear that if you do nothing about it, well…” Nau’ul voiced his worries, hands twisting ― a very human-like gesticulation.
Mando had spaced out, not listening to one word. He only snapped out of his trance when the door creaked, announcing Ca’nara’s and your arrival.
The bags under your eyes were screaming for some rest, which apparently had been evading you. He had given you enough hours alone to get some sleep and freshen up, so why hadn’t you? If you looked so miserable, that was entirely down to you, not him. Of that much he was sure.
Din straightened his back, sitting up properly, while Nau’ul rushed off his feet to serve you the food the droid had prepared. With a flourish of his hand, he presented you with his creation.
“It’s tiingilar, a Mandalorian stew of meat, vegetables and spices. It’s hot, very hot, be careful,” the protocol droid warned you.
From across the table, Din could have sworn he saw your eyes watering, then you blinked a few times, grabbing the spoon.
“Oh my stars, how many spices have you put in here?”
“Oh, you don’t like spicy food?”
“Well, I do, but it smells so spicy, I’m about to cry, phew!” you swept along your waterlines with your index fingers, making a point.
“Alor prefers it this way. I can prepare something else…”
“No, no. It’s fine. I’ll eat it. Thank you…?” You dragged your words, looking for a name.
“Nau’ul,” he replied. “Anything you need, please ask.”
And then all three droids disappeared from sight, leaving you both alone in the dining room.
You glanced up from your plate, eyeing him above your spoon while you blew on it to cool it down.
“Are you not eating, Just Mando?” you raised an eyebrow, inquiring.
If Nau’ul was still in the room, Din would have snarled at him. Instead, he folded arms again and shook his head no.
“I’ve already eaten,” he explained dully.
He couldn’t―wouldn’t―remove his helmet in your presence, or anyone’s. Not even his droids had seen his face in all the years they had been together. Din had been raised to follow the Mandalorian Creed and even though he was no longer part of the Bounty Hunters’ Guild, he still believed. It was intrinsic to him, to who he was. Or had been. The only thing that kept him true to himself.
“Because you can’t remove your helmet in front of me. Right?”
Din tilted his head in surprise. He did not expect you to know that. Were you acquainted with the Mandalorian culture? And if so, why? You were not one, he could tell. But what were you? Your accent was a mixture of different ones, so he could not pinpoint where you originated from.
“This is the Way,” he found himself saying. It had been a long time since those words last escaped his mouth. “Where are you from?”
“Oh, from here and there, everywhere and nowhere…” Then you took the first spoonful of the stew and started coughing almost instantly. “Fuck, this is spicy,” you whispered, tears in your eyes, as your hand lunged forward to eagerly down the drink.
Din almost smiled at your severe reaction. The corners of his lips began to curl up but quickly dissipated, his own body fighting against such act of rebellion.
“So you’re a nomad?” He asked with certain curiosity in his voice, while he leaned forward to pass you the jug full of ale to top up your drink.
“Yes. I don’t have a homeworld. I don’t even know where I was born, we moved around so much my father didn’t even remember,” you went on almost absentmindedly, pouring the beer in your glass. “What about you, Just Mando?”
“Why do you keep calling me ‘Just Mando’? It’s just Mando,” as soon as he said it out loud, he understood the joke. He pressed his lips together, slightly amused. “I see,” he mumbled.
You laughed as if it was the best joke ever. The warmth in your laughter was vivid, hearty, compelling. Like a melody it filled the air ― suddenly the room was not as bare as before. As cold either.
“So? Were you born here in Mandalore, Mando?” the smirk coiling your lips told him you were teasing him.
Din debated whether to open up or not. Whether to tell you the truth or a lie. But Nau’ul was right, if you were to spend the rest of your lives together, lying was not a good start.
“I was born in Aq Vetina, but was raised in Concordia,” was his succinct answer.
Your eyes unsuccessfully searched for his under the visor. Din could tell you wanted to press him, get more information out of him, but that was as much as he was willing to share today.
“Eat up. It’s going to get cold,” he urged you, wanting to leave so he could be alone.
“So bossy,” you whispered to yourself, rolling your eyes to the back of your head, before attacking the tiingilar.
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Nine weeks later
You turned to the next page of the book on your lap, your mind completely captivated by the story of the pages in front of you. Books were scarce in this day and age, but Mando had managed to salvage a few after years of rummaging through the rubble. This one in particular was a storybook for children ― a story about a Mandalorian fighting the Mythosaur down in the Mines.
You were immersed in it, curled up in your bed with a thick duvet and a few pillows around you. Your room was not bare anymore ― you had decorated with a few trinkets you had found in your day trips to the outside world, with Mando as your guide. The fear of the first week had slowly eased, giving way to a new sense of comfort.
Forgotten was your thirst for freedom. With the passage of time, you learnt that Mando was not joking when he first said death was the only way out. And since you didn’t want to die, you slowly had embraced this new way of life. You had made friends with the three droids and had really tried to form sort of friendship with Mando.
The Mandalorian was a tough nut to crack. He was not keen on showing emotion, so much so you even wondered if he was capable of feeling anything. You had noticed that, many a times, he relied on Nau’ul to show him how he should act or react. A droid teaching a human how to be human ― unfathomable. Perhaps all these years alone in Mandalore had taken its toll on him.
And so you liked to think that you were somewhat helping him reconnect with that side of him you thought long gone. By ‘helped’, maybe you meant ‘forced’, but Mando had thrown you in this situation, so now he had to put up with you.
The door to your room opened suddenly, startling you so bad you almost threw the book at Mando.
“One of these days you’re gonna give me a heart attack. Don’t you know how to knock?” You screeched, hugging the storybook to your chest and burying yourself under the duvet ― you were only wearing a shirt and your underwear.
“Are you not ready yet?” you had grown used to the exasperation in his voice.
“Ready for what? It’s only half seven in the morning, Mando!”
“You wanted to visit the Living Waters in the Mines and see for yourself if it really is a Mythosaur’s lair, remember? Since you don’t believe a damn word of what I say,” he scowled, still under the doorframe.
“Oh, shit! You’re right!”
How could you have forgotten? You had been insisting for over two weeks now, and only yesterday did he capitulate. You were no Mandalorian, so shouldn’t be in such a sacred place, but you managed to convince him that it would do literally no harm to anyone if you visited.
In your excitement, you jumped out of bed, forgetting you were half naked, and looked for some clothes to put on.
“I’ll… I’ll be waiting in the parlour,” he muttered and disappeared into the hallway.
Ten minutes later, you were outside, on your way to the Civic Center. As you approached this new-to-you, unprobed area, the destruction around you made your stomach churn. The Great Purge and then years of neglect painted a gruesome picture in front of you. Inside was even worse, although you couldn’t see much considering how dark it was.
You followed Mando diligently ― he had been here before, so you trusted his instinct. You stepped where he did and remained silent while you descended into the ground.
After a few more minutes, a humid, warm cave appeared in sight. There were massive pillars holding the crumbling ceiling, and piles of debris everywhere. Stairs led a path to the Living Waters below.
“This is beautiful,” you mumbled in awe, looking around you.
The place was eerie and silent as a tomb. Seeing it with your own eyes, now you could understand why people would believe in the existence of a mythological creature.
There was a plaque on a stone nearby and you got closer to read it. However, the writing was in Mando’a, so you cocked your head to look at Mando.
“What does it say?”
He walked towards you and stopped right behind you. His proximity sent a warning shiver down your spine. You ignored your body’s reaction, focusing on the words you didn’t understand.
“These Mines date back to the Age of the First Mand’Alor. According to ancient folklore, the Mines were once a Mythosaur lair. Mandalore the Great is said to have tamed the mythical beast. It is from these legends that the skull signet was adopted and became the symbol of our planet,” he relayed, his voice ricocheting between the bare walls.
“And you are sure you’ve seen it? Mandalore the Great lived, what, hundreds of years ago? In all that time, you’re telling me, you’ve been the only man to witness the rise of the beast?” One perfect eyebrow raised into your forehead, a smirk curling up your lips, as you taunted him.
Although you couldn’t see, you liked to imagine the frustration distorting his features. Lately you had wondered who the man under the helmet was, but you knew you would never find out. Mando took the Creed very seriously, too seriously.
“I did,” he replied concisely. “I don’t care if you don’t believe me.”
“And what were you doing in the water anyway? It does not look very inviting.”
“I had to redeem myself,” you could tell he hadn’t mean to tell you that, because he nervously adjusted his posture.
“Why?”
You were like a loth-wolf with a bone ― you wouldn’t let it go that easily.
“I had broken the Creed and had to atone for it,” his voice lowered, uncomfortable with the topic.
“How did you break it?”
“Will you ever stop asking so many damn questions?” he growled, evading your probing.
You lifted your hands up in the air in a peaceful gesture, but not without a subtle grin on your mouth. You loved driving him crazy, it was one of the little fun you could have in this place.
“Alright, alright.”
You bent down to grab some flat stones off the ground and practiced your stone skipping skills. That was until Mando’s big hand wrapped around your wrist, stopping you mid-throw.
“Stop that, you’re going to awaken the beast,” he snarled, pushing you close to his chest a bit too forcefully.
“Oh, come on. Gimme a break, Mando. There’s no Mythosaur, you must have imagined it.”
“There is and I didn’t,” his grip loosened, and you took the opportunity to throw another stone. “Fucking quit that attitude now,” he warned you, grabbing you by both of your wrists, your hands flush against the beskar breastplate.
Your pelvis was sweetly pressed against his, your thighs touching his. Even with the beskar pieces, you could feel all his edges, his― Shit. His manhood resting just above where slick heat was gathering in your core.
You laughed to release your own tension ― your head snapping back, exposing your neck to his eyes.
“Oh, wow. You’re serious,” you managed to say between laughs, ignoring how close you were to him. Ignoring how wet your pussy was.
“Of course I am. You don’t unders―”
The sound of water abruptly moving forced both of you to look in the direction of the pond. Something enormous had risen, taking up the whole airspace, and water cascaded down its sides.
You froze in place, your mind rushing to come to terms with what you were seeing, as you looked at the gigantic figure towering above you. The water kept falling, so you couldn’t really make the shape of the monster underneath. But in that moment, you knew Mando had not imagined jack shit. The Mythosaur was real. Very real.
Mando pushed you back and put himself between you and the imminent danger. Above his shoulder, you saw horns sticking out and a big pair of eyes staring you down. Its skin was covered in scales and small horns, giving it a very reptilian appearance. The Mythosaur was massive beyond comprehension, and you could not, for the life of you, visualise it being tamed or, worse, ridden.
Time stilled and so did the beast. Its eyes were transfixed on you ― no, on Mando. As if they were measuring each other up, as if they were communicating somehow. Since that was impossible, it was obvious you were imagining things.
Before any of you could react, your heart pounding manically and your breath hitching, the beast went back down below the water level, and a massive wave dashed towards you. Within a matter of seconds, the Mythosaur was gone, and you and Mando were soaked to the bones.
Mando reacted before you did, turning around and forcing you to walk back.
“Let’s go, now! Move!”
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In the safety of your bed, after a hot, steamy shower, you let your mind drift back to the moment in time where Mando had held you close to his chest earlier that day. How your body had unwillingly behaved to his closeness, how you ached for him to reach below your hips, right between your thighs…
With a soft moan, you gave in to the desire that had been pooling low in your belly for a while now. Your fingers dipped under your underwear, finding that sweet bundle of nerves in your wet slit. Your index tapped at your clit a few times until you stroked it ― electricity shooting up your spine.
That felt so good, you did it again and again and again, while your brain came up with different scenarios where Mando was giving you hell. With half-lidded eyes and lips parted, you smothered the beating nub with your thumb, two other fingers finding the entrance to your pussy and submerging in your wet heat.
You picked up a relentless pace, imagining they were Mando’s thick fingers, as the first orgasm in a long while started to build up inside you. Your own hand made you whimper, teeth sinking in your bottom lip so hard you almost drew blood. Your back arched involuntarily, stroking your pulsing clit more harshly now, your fingers reaching further in.
The squealing noise of the door opening alarmed you, your orgasm evaporating into thin air. You just about managed to remove your tantalising hand from your panties and throw the duvet above you. Panicking, you looked at the door.
Mando was under the frame, so still you thought he was a statue. You had tried to conceal what you were doing, but the rigidity of his posture told you he had seen enough.
Your cheeks reddened, your face on fire at the realisation of being caught masturbating. By none other than the protagonist of your wet dreams.
“Mando! I told you to fucking KNOCK!” You screamed at him from under the quilt. “You can’t just walk in like that!”
When you didn’t hear the door close ―because you were not expecting an apology from him―, you peeked above the duvet.
The Mandalorian had not moved one inch, and you really feared he had become immobile forever. But the tent on his groin showing through his body stocking told you otherwise.
And then he walked into the room, closing the door behind him. It was the first time he had trespassed the doorframe, you noticed. Butterflies filled your stomach and your lungs as he approached the bed you were lying on, your widened eyes looking for his unsuccessfully ― always unsuccessfully.
Mando didn’t say one word as he removed his gloves, coming to a halt by your side with his shins pressing against the bedframe. When they dropped to the floor, your eyes drifted right up at him, searching for clues, anything that could be crossing his mind.
His naked fingers were the first time you saw his skin, a bit of him. He was real, and he was right in front of you, caressing your cheek. You found yourself closing your eyes and leaning on the palm of his hand ― a tender gesture amidst your unresolved sexual desire.
Mando tilted his head, and you understood. An unspoken petition that you willingly granted. Driven by your lust, you scooted over to the other side of the bed, making room for him, dragging the duvet with you.
“Nuh-uh,” he clicked his tongue as he knelt on the mattress after having kicked his boots.
He yanked the duvet off you, exposing you to him with just your shirt and underwear.
You leaned back against the mountain of pillows and looked at him doe-eyed ― then your sight followed his right hand as it landed on your pubic bone. You pressed your lips into a fine line, swallowing a moan at his touch. His fingertips traced your wet slit over your panties.
“What were you doing, hm?” he husked, his long finger dragging against the garment.
“I, uh… well…” you stammered, unable to look for the words.
“Were you touching yourself?”
“Mhmm,” you nodded.
“Were you close?” a sliver of care transpired through his modulated voice.
“Yes,” you cooed.
“Sorry, mesh’la (beautiful). Let me help you with that,” he offered at the same time his fingers dunked under the waistband of your panties.
You melted into the mattress, audibly moaning, when he stroked you. Your eyes shut to focus on the pleasure his fingers were expertly working on you, sliding through your slit a few times, from your thudding clit to your dripping hole ― your clit hitching between his fingers every time he traced them back up.
He worked your flesh with his bare digits, and after a few minutes, his index and middle fingers went back down to your hot entrance. He tempted you with the tips but didn’t go in ― you were tiptoeing on the precipice of your pleasure.
You whimpered, annoyed.
“Please, Mando―”
“Din. Call me Din, mesh’la,” he hummed, the tip of his finger circling your entrance.
“Please, Din,” you blurted out, eyes flying open and transfixed on his visor, begging.
You let go of a pitiful groan when Din―you liked how his name rolled off your tongue―finally gave you what you wanted, what you needed. Two of his thick fingers dove in your seeping pussy, slightly parting your walls in preparation―hopefully, if you were lucky―for his dick.
First slow, then a devilish rhythm his fingers imparted on you. The orgasm quickly built up again, Din’s dexterity beckoning you to climb to the hilltop. And you did, you let yourself feel all the pleasure he was giving you until it was too much, your clit raw and overstimulated by his precise thumb. You reached the top of the mountain and jumped into the abyss underneath. The wave of your climax washed over your, drowning you ― your cunt spasming around his fingers while your knees pressed together.
When you opened your eyes again, all tearful due to immensity of your frenzy, you were relieved to find that Din had released his throbbing erection through the zipper in his body stocking―you didn’t have the patience right now to unclasp all the armour pieces, you needed him now.
The sight of his engorged dick made your mouth water. The girth and the length of it should have made you flinch, but instead it made your pussy wet itself a bit more. It had the perfect size to fill your insides to the brim. Din’s hand moved up and down on his shaft, slowly pumping himself although he was already hard.
You lifted your hand towards his manhood, and he removed his to let you touch him ― for a second you were fascinated by the soft swaying of his cock. Then you wrapped your fingers around it and Mando grumbled, sitting on his heels, manspread for you as a tasty offering. He was a sight to see ― knelt and sat on his heels on the mattress, fully clothed, helmet on, armour hugging his body, and his erection peeking out through the zipper, leaky and throbbing just for you.
Giving him a few pumps, you looked up at him with a smirk. And before he could complain or stop you, you came closer to him and gave the plump head a lick, then sealed your lips around his leaking glans.
The groan that bubbled up his throat spurred you on to bob your head down, taking half of his pulsing length in your mouth.
Din’s hand tugged at your hair abruptly, pulling you off his twitching dick.
You glanced up at him confused.
“I can’t―I don’t think I can take a blowjob without blowing my load, mesh’la. I need to fuck you now,” he was honest with you.
It was understandable. He had been stuck here for at least eight years, which meant that he had not laid with a woman for at least as long. You would have lost your mind too if someone hadn’t touched you in that time.
“Come on then, fuck me, Din,” you mumbled, laying back down on the pile of pillows so your upper body was propped up.
You spread your legs, making room for him. Din swiftly shifted, dragging himself into position.
It was a fucking sight; one you had been dying to see. And he was finally there, all cozy in between your thighs. He parted your legs, resting the back of your knees on his shoulders. He pushed your panties to a side, leaving you completely exposed.
You couldn’t see, but you knew his eyes were focused on the prize―your damp, puffy folds, clit twitching and hole begging.
“Been wanting some pussy for a while now,” he confessed in a grumble, head tilted back when the tip of his veiny cock slipped up and down your damp furrow.
“Here I am, take what you need.”
How altruistic of you.
His mushroom, precum-covered head caught on your slick entrance and Din bucked his hips a little, only the tip smoothly going in. Your heartrate spiked, your walls imploring for the full length of him to clench on. And then, Din thrusted in harshly, pushing his cock in down to the hilt in one smooth jolt. You both howled in unison at the intrusion ― his a deep, guttural moan, yours a high-pitched one.
Mando held onto your knees on his shoulders as he started with the slow sway of his hips impacting on the back of your thighs, building the perfect pace. His dick dragged along the right spot inside you as he jackhammered you into the pillows, another orgasm gathering in your core. Din’s rhythm became frantic, frenzied, to the point where he had to let go of your knees and lean forward, his hands holding onto the rattling headboard.
Mando fucked you hard, drilling you like a man starved. You could feel him stuffing you full, his hard dick disappearing between your swollen, greedy pussy lips. Reaching up, you held onto his arms above you, fingers wrapping around his elbows. Your body rocked up and down on the bed below him with the force of his unrestrained charges.
Your cunt couldn’t take it anymore ― it contracted around his girth, announcing your second climax, which quickly overtook your senses. With stars in your vision, you wailed his name, now fisting the bedsheets as you came, a never-ending wave making your twitch under him uncontrollably.
“Fuck, I… Fuck,” he growled, his hips bucking and stuttering erratically at the sight of your fucked-out expression.
He was close, you knew by the way his dick constantly pulsed inside you ― he just needed a bit of prodding. That was your signal to clench your walls around him, squeezing him as hard and snug as you could, clamping on his thudding cock, never wanting to let him go.
That was his undoing ― you felt Din’s warm, thick spend painting your inner walls, his steely cock convulsing with the last waves of his release.
When you opened your eyes, you saw Din between your legs, his dick still buried inside you as it softened. The inside of his visor was fogged up and you doubted he could see much.
“I didn’t mean to come inside, I was gonna pull out―”
“It’s okay,” you cut him off. He didn’t need to worry about that.
His helmet tilted, but whatever question lingered in his mind, he didn’t ask.
His thumb lightly pressed your relaxed clit with gratitude, massaging it softly, before he pulled out and your pussy released his shaft. That gentle stroke ignited your nerve endings, slowly coming back to life. His thumb then went down, gathering the cum your pussy was releasing, and shoved it back inside you.
You bit your bottom lip to stop a needy moan.
“Wanna go again?” you asked, grinning. Offering.
Din laughed. He fucking laughed. You had never heard him laugh before.
“Sure do, but I need a minute, mesh’la.”
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Every night for the next two weeks Din found himself stranded in the corridor leading to your room, like a lost, thirsty man looking for water in the harsh desert of Tatooine.
The internal struggle was always the same ― he shouldn’t seek you because, after all, you were his prisoner. You were stuck here with him because he had forced you to, giving you no other choice. Sure, he had not imposed his presence on you―quite the opposite, in fact―but it still seemed wrong to take advantage of you like that.
But then he would see you come out of your room, almost as if you knew he was marooned there, and would approach him with caution. Willingly you would take his hand and lead him to your nest, erasing any doubts he could have about your eagerness. You were as keen as he was ― fucking had become an entertaining pastime. And a calming balm for the beast within.
It was the same dance every night, without failure. And tonight had been no different, except for the hushed “I want you so badly, Din” that had dropped from your parted lips as you rode the last wave of your orgasm, a blissful expression softening your features.
As he stood outside of your door, back towards it, Din wondered what you had truly meant. Was it just a benign slip of tongue or was there something else behind it? He hoped for the first, because he couldn’t afford the second.
Feeling something―anything―was out of the question. Even if he wanted to, didn’t matter how hard he tried, he just couldn’t. Elsbeth had cursed him to an eternity of apathy, and it had worked ― over the curse of the last eight years, Din’s feelings had dimmed, diminished and then disappeared, while his inner monster became more powerful, feeding off his emotions like a leech sucking blood out of its host. Mando had tried to feel to keep the beast at bay ― would even make the droids try to anger him in silly competitions, but the dull sense in his chest just grew bigger and bigger, like a tumour rotting his entrails.
Din couldn’t remember what happiness felt like ― he had a barren wasteland for a heart. So cold were his insides, he even thought all his organs were covered in beskar. That was what brought him back to your room every night ― your warmth, how it would seep through the cracks of his skin, warming up a part of him that he thought dead.
Tonight, he had allowed himself to really feel your body against his ― helmet still on of course, you both had been stripped naked for the first time, your skin rubbing his, heating him up. Whether he would admit it or not, he craved you. Yearned for your warmth.
With a shake of his head, his feet finally unglued from your doorstep and sauntered towards the west wing. A single light at the end of the corridor twinkled, snuffing out the moment he stepped below it.
He swung the door open to a room he had not visited in a very long while. Din preferred to pay no mind to the source of his emotional detachment, but Nau’ul’s words had been nagging him for weeks now, an annoying reminder scratching the back of his brain.
“It dims more and more every day, Alor. The Darksaber is losing its glow.”
He had to see for himself.
The room should have been dark if it wasn’t for the light the Darksaber’s blade emitted. Din trudged towards the display stand in the middle of the empty space, where the Darksaber rested under a glass case. Two metal, U-shaped pins held the Darksaber upright.
An electrifying, white glow encased the black blade, but it was certainly fainter than what he remembered. Significantly fainter. It had taken him a few years to understand that the Darksaber was the vessel of his curse ― as his feelings dwindled and the beast grew fonder of control, so did the light of the Darksaber. He was not sure though about which one caused the other to wither away.
As he stared at it, Din pondered what would happen the day the light from the Darksaber would flicker away. Morgan had died before he could fully understand the idiosyncrasies of his malediction. At first, the frustration of the unknown had only driven him mad, especially when the full moons would bloom on the night sky, leaving him at the mercy of his curse.
The first time he had transformed, bathed by the white light of Concordia, Din thought he was dying. The burning sensation, the bones breaking and fusing back together, the stretch of his skin, the blood becoming cold in his veins and his mind spiralling out of control… He hadn’t died, but he sure wished he did. Only at dawn was he able to gain back control, so exhausted he just laid on the dirt near the Civic Center for an entire day before finding his way back to the royal prison.
Only with the insight of time did he decide it did not matter. The end was the end, and if that was the way, then he would greet it.
Din sighed, his eyes dry under the helmet. Looking around and knowing himself on his own, he carefully removed his helmet, wincing in agony, and placed it on top of the glass case. He pinched the bridge of his aquiline nose in an attempt to clear his mind, one hand resting on the glass.
Eyes shut for a long minute, he ended up fluttering them open. His reflection greeted him ― a terrible, gruesome sight, a face he almost didn’t recognise anymore. The scar that ran from the left of his chin diagonally to his right temple had distorted his features ― his chin slightly dented, the left corner of his mouth raggedy, the flesh on his upper left cheek mildly sunken around the scar, his crooked nose even more angular and his split eyebrow giving him a permanent frown. And then his right eye, completely blinded with a white discolouration covering his iris and pupil.
He could still feel the blade of the Darksaber melting his beskar helmet as Morgan pressed it against him. It hadn’t completely cut through the Mandalorian alloy, but the fire filtering through had burnt his skin, leaving an everlasting imprint on his face.
Din remembered the heat, the panic building up and the sizzling sound of his skin as it thawed like ice under the sun. The smell of burnt skill still haunted him sometimes when the helmet became too overwhelming.
The damaged tissue was thick but extremely sensitive ― every time he pulled the helmet off his head, the fabric inside would drag against the scar tissue, making him flinch in pain.
Shaking his head to release his mind from such memories, Din stared at the Darksaber for longer than intended, lost in his train of thought. For the first time in ages, he wanted to know if the curse could ever be broken.
Until you meet your Maker once more.
That had a pretty definite sentence to it. Death was the only way out.
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“I didn’t see you last night,” you mumbled, repressing the need to add an ‘again’ to the end of your sentence.
You had noticed that there were certain nights when Mando would vanish, wouldn’t visit you at all. You wouldn’t see him in the morning either and if you asked any of the droids, they were as evasive as their master.
You still didn’t know why and every time you prodded him about it, his answer was…
“Had stuff to take care of.”
You sighed, pressing your lips into a thin line. The idea of slapping him had its appeal.
“Are we still going?” you quickly changed subject, not wanting to be disappointed with him today. “I’ve not really asked you for anything in the three months I’ve been here.”
You watched his gloved fingers drum on the metallic surface, helmet tipped to one side as he considered your words. You wanted to believe that in the time you both had spent together, Din’s undaunted façade had softened a bit. His replies had become less snappy, his posture slightly more relaxed, and his hands way more caring as they canvassed your skin every night.
An invisible force had been towing you towards him, his gravitational pull irresistible. Din Djarin was a challenge to you, a puzzle you had started putting together. He strived so hard to remain indifferent, it was now an exciting game to make him feel. The only downfall? You were falling for him. Perhaps him being the only man to walk this planet had something to do with it, you had no other options. Also, you knew that fucking the brains out of each other every night would eventually lead you here.
Considering that you had a lifetime to spend on this world, letting yourself feel for Mando was something you could afford. And even if he didn’t want to show it, you were positively sure he was not as apathetic towards you as he let on.
“Alright. I don’t see the harm,” he accepted.
You mumbled a “yes!” with a smile crooking your lips as you pushed the chair back to stand up.
“I’ll be back in a minute.”
You rushed out of the room to run to yours and change. The winter was receding, but the cold was still bitter and nippy, so you decided to put on appropriate gear. A few minutes later, you darted towards the lift, where Din was already waiting.
Couldn’t help yourself, you had to smile at him, the softness of your grin reaching your eyes.
Din cleared his throat, face facing forwards to avoid your orbs meeting his.
The way down in the elevator was soundless, but you had grown used to his silence treatment. The short journey to the crashing site was as tranquil as the trip down the lift. Mando was truly a man of few words.
When you caught a glimpse of your T-65B X-wing starfighter, you overtook Din and ran towards it in excitement.
“Careful there! The ground is slippery, you’re gonna―”
Before Mando could finish his warning, you recreated what his next words were going to be: you slipped on an icesheet. Waving your arms so you wouldn’t lose your footing, you ended up falling face first. You managed to partially stop the fall with your hands. The rocks underneath slashed your winter trousers, cutting your left shin.
By the time Din had gotten to your side, you had already stood up.
“You okay?” he asked with worry in his voice.
You nodded, smirking at the preoccupation he was showing.
“Yeah,” you lied. If he knew you had hurt yourself, you would be turning around and returning home empty-handed.
“Be more careful, will you? The ship ain’t going nowhere,” he snarled once he knew you were fine.
You rolled your eyes at him before strolling to the aircraft. Your old X-wing had seen better days ― the glass of the cockpit was smashed; vegetation had grown over the body. Moss covered most of it, painting it green instead of white. When you peeked inside the cabin, you realised it was flooded, all electrics wet. It was truly done for ― if you ever had any hope of leaving this planet, it would not be aboard your X-wing.
Din stood watch as you foraged for the item you were here for. After a few minutes, you located the star compass under the seat in the cockpit, drenched. Looking over your shoulder to see where Mando was, you opened the compass and water leaked everywhere. The black lodestone was static, unmoving ― maybe it just needed to dry off. Despite how damaged it was, you hoped it would still work. You were not planning on using it, obviously, but it was a reminder of your old life, one that now seemed very far away.
You couldn’t say you missed your previous life. The constant travelling had taken a toll on you in the last few years, having almost lost sight of searching for the Darksaber. Now that your feet were back down on the ground, gravity keeping you centred, this new life was not so bad after all.
“You found it?”
“Yeah!”
You quickly clasped the lid back down and jumped out of the cockpit. Perhaps you had lied to Din about what you were really looking for, but something in you told you not to tell the truth. So, when he asked you that morning why you wanted to go back to the shipwreck, you simply lied, telling him you were looking for your family’s locket ― a relic that had been passed down for generations.
The object was small enough to pass for one. You waved it at him quickly, not really showing it to him, before you shoved it in one of the pockets in your vest. Luckily Din didn’t ask for it, otherwise he would have realised it was made of beskar.
“Let’s go back then.”
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“You’re bleeding,” Din’s fingers grabbed you by the elbow, yanking you back before you crossed the door to your room.
You looked down, having forgotten about the wound on your leg. You shrugged, downplaying it.
“It’s nothing, I’ll just take care of it now.”
“Like hell you are,” he growled with clenched teeth while dragging you inside.
He only let go of your elbow when you were by your unmade bed. Din stopped right in front of you, hands on hips. He nodded to you, commanding you to remove your trousers so he could see.
Your eyes rolled in frustration and clicked your tongue.
“It’s fine, Din. Don’t worry about it,” you dismissed him with a wave of your hand.
“I’ll decide if I have to worry or not.”
And, without prompt, he pulled down your trousers in a swift movement, leaving your legs bare. You huffed but let him help you out of them and remove your boots. Mando signalled you to sit on your bed and so you did. Din knelt in front of you, grabbing your hurt leg by the ankle until your heel was resting on his bent knee.
He inspected the wound for a minute after having removed his gloves. His fingertips burnt your skin where they ghosted over it.
“It’s not too deep, just a scratch.”
“I told you it was nothing. You have some unresolved trust issues, Din,” you joked, slightly leaning back with the heels of your hands flat on the mattress.
You couldn’t see but knew his eyes squinted under the visor.
“I’ll go get something to clean it. Wait here.”
Mando walked out and you took the chance to remove the uncomfortable coat. A minute later, he had returned with a clean rag and a small container with lukewarm water. He knelt in front of you again, grabbing your leg, and dutifully cleaned the wound.
You couldn’t help but sigh at the feathery touch of his fingers on the back of your knee. His proximity was enough to lighten your need for him. Also, being only in your underwear and a shirt while he was knelt between your legs did not help at all. Your imagination was already running wild ― and so your legs parted slightly, almost involuntarily.
Din’s attention shifted from the wound to your core. He tried to hide he was being distracted, but the helmet kept tilting to one side so he could have a better look at where your thighs met.
You chewed on your bottom lip, slick warmth pooling in between your legs.
“Din,” you hushed his name, your hand searching his so he would stop cleaning the wound.
The Mandalorian didn’t need much prodding after that. He towered above you rising to his feet, his hips at your eye level. You knew he was hard already, so couldn’t ignore the call of the siren.
With rigid steps, he walked towards the chest and placed the container dow. He scrunched the rag so the water dripped back into it. Soon enough, he was in front of you again, clean rag on hand.
“Do you trust me, mesh’la?” his modulated voice was low and husky.
You nodded vehemently.
“I want to try something different this time,” he murmured, the rag twisting in his hands. “But you gotta promise me you’ll behave for me.”
“I will,” you promised, breath hitching in anticipation.
“I’m going to blindfold you and remove my helmet. But I have only two ground rules: you can’t take it off and you can’t touch my face. At all. No excuses. Are we clear?”
A rush of lustful excitement ploughed through your veins. You found yourself nodding again, your neck hurting.
“Use your words, cyar’ika (beloved).”
“Yes. Crystal clear, Din,” you mumbled, widened, almost adoring eyes staring at him. You hadn’t missed the endearment term, although he seemed to not have noticed.
“Good,” he curled one finger at you.
You sat back up, hands laced on your lap patiently waiting as Din blindfolded you with the damp rag. He secured it with a very tight knot on the back and made sure three times that it would not go anywhere.
“If you break your promise, I’ll have to kill you,” the threat was very real, not even a hint of joke in it.
Your mouth went dry and your clit irremediably pulsed ― your pussy was already wet and warm for him. You shouldn’t get off on a death threat, but apparently Din could reduce you to a slick mess just like that.
“I-I won’t remove it. You have my word. Please.”
“Be a good girl for me and lay down on your back,” he commanded you and you happily obliged.
Your heartrate spiked as you heard Din discarding the beskar pieces over his body stocking. Maybe you were too eager, but he was taking too damn long. Then a hissing sound told you his helmet was gone.
This was fucking torture. You wanted to see him, to see the face of the man who made you wet with just a few words. It was cruel of him to impose something like this on you, such a prohibition. However, you understood what his Creed entailed and respected it.
Hated yourself right now for respecting it, but you did.
Din placed his hands on the back of your knees and lifted your legs up, the soles of your feet resting on either side of his naked hips. The warm palms of his hands caressed your ankles, massaging them briefly, before travelling up your calves and inner thighs, leaving goosebumps in his wake.
Unceremoniously, his fingers curled around the hem of your panties and pulled them down your legs; you couldn’t see but were sure he had thrown them away.
The Mandalorian exhaled audibly the moment his hands landed on your knees and pulled your legs apart. You squirmed, knowing he was devouring you with his eyes.
“Din, please, just―” you whimpered, moany and needy, anticipating.
“Shush. Don’t be so impatient, mesh’la,” he chastised you while stepping back.
That was the first time you listened to his real, manly voice. It was deep and raspy, surly yet sweet.
Your feet, no longer supported on his hips, dropped to the ground.
“Go on your fours,” he talked you through the position he wanted you in as you obeyed. “Now lean down, rest that pretty face of yours on the mattress for me.”
With your perky ass up in the air, you felt very exposed with your inner thighs pressed together and framing your swollen pussy like a pretty picture just for him.
One of his fingers traced your wet slit and you had to stop yourself from wiggling your hips until his finger was partially inside you.
“Look at her, all drippy and puffy for me. She knows what’s coming, doesn’t she? That’s why she’s so fucking wet,” he hummed, shuffling behind you.
You couldn’t see him, but you were damn sure he was on his knees at the feet of the bed.
Din placed his hands on your ass cheeks and parted them, the skin in your sticky furrow stretching while his thumbs caressed your labia. Your cunt was on full display, and you could feel the cold air of the room against your damp, sensitive skin.
“At last, I can claim her as mine,” Din whispered, his hot breath fanning on your pussy now, sending shivers up your spine.
You moaned, finally understanding what was coming.
He didn’t keep you waiting. Din’s tongue lapped your whole pussy in one go and your entire body trembled at the wet touch, his beard prickling your skin. Covering your mouth, you swallowed a pitiful whimper while your eyes rolled to the back of your skull. Mando’s broad hands squeezed your ass, grounding you, as he leaned forward again to drink from the fountain of your pleasure.
His tongue dipped in your creamy slit and stroked it slowly, deliberately loitering around your clit, but never really paying it much attention. He kissed your swollen lips, making out with them as if they were your mouth, the tip of nose intimately caressing your perineum. With the help of his fingers, he splayed open your quivering cunt, your hole accessible to the apex of his mischievous tongue.
Din licked you for minutes on end, ignoring your pulsing clit on purpose. The tension inside you coiled almost uncomfortably, so intense it would snap at any given moment. His devilish persuasion was relentless, more so when he would introduce his tongue in your very core.
You bucked your hips against his mouth, grinding. Desperate.
“Din, please, please, here,” you begged, slipping one of your hands down your belly and in between your legs.
You parted your slippery pussy lips, your clit hitching between them, showing him exactly where you wanted his goddamn tongue.
“Here, please,” you insisted, teary-eyed, at the edge of your patience.
“So impatient, mesh’la,” he chuckled behind you, still on your fours for him.
Finally, his lips latched onto your clit, and you whined out loud, pure elation running through your veins at the sweet suckling of his mouth. His teeth grazed the sensitive nub, and you saw stars behind your eyes, head slightly tilted backwards as you mewled until your throat felt raw.
Din sucked on your clit harshly at the same time two of his thick fingers found their way to your oozing hole. You screamed a resounding “fuck” at the perfect intrusion. The combination of his tongue and his digits were more than what your nervous system could take. Lick, pump, lick, pump ― the perfect rhythm making your toes curl, your pussy clench and your clit set ablaze.
The whole pussy-eating-from-the-back situation was too much ― his fingers ever so tantalising, you surrendered. Rubbing your cunt against his mouth, you moaned his name as the best orgasm of your life almost rendered you unconscious. You came on his mouth while Din just sipped from you, drinking all your discharge as if it was the last drops he would ever taste.
You could only hear your heart beating in your eardrums, all your senses overwhelmed. You were so out, you had almost forgotten the rag blindfolding you.
“You’re gonna come again for me, mesh’la,” only then did you realised his fingers were still inside you.
You panted, gathering your thoughts.
“I don’t think I can,” you mumbled, entranced.
“Oh, you can and you will,” he groaned, accepting the challenge.
And with that, his wicked lips pressed against your cunt, and he started all over again. As it turned out, he was fucking right. His tongue and his fingers were working you so well, there was no way you could resist. However, this time, there weren’t two fingers stuffed in your whole, but four. Your walls were so outstretched it should have been painful, but it wasn’t ― he had made sure to get you ready, pliant under his dutiful care.
“I wonder if you could take him. Bet you could,” Din whispered in a moment of respite.
“Huh?”
All thoughts dispersed when the second climax spread across your entire body, leaving you exhausted; a pitiful, sweaty mess on the bedsheets.
“Turn around and lay down. I’m gonna fuck you stupid,” the crudeness of his words should have made you frown but instead you smiled, completely blissed out.
Din made good on his promise. On your back and with your legs parted, you heard him moving around until he was between your thighs. Then he leaned forward, his hands on either side of your shoulders to keep his weight off you, and his hard shaft dove inside your cunt with no resistance. When he bottomed out, he snapped his hips back and then forth, until he was rutting into you like a man on death row.
Your hands held onto his back, your nails digging in his skin. You wanted to move them up and sink them in his hair so badly, your palms were itchy with longing. He had said you couldn’t touch his face; he hadn’t said anything about his hair. Hoping he wouldn’t notice your intentions, your hands drifted up his back, arriving at the nape of his neck.
So close to burying your hands in his hair, so fucking close…
“Don’t,” he growled at you, the snapping of his hips against yours unforgiving. “The fucking audacity. I. said. don’t. fucking. touch,” he punctuated every word with deep, sharp thrusts.
You winced and gasped at the depth of his dives, your mouth shaping a perfect O, back arched off the mattress below you. Every stab of his dick kissed your cervix, and you just couldn’t stop moaning uncontrollably. The mild pain quickly blossomed into ecstasy; your skin electrified with pleasure.
Suddenly you felt his mouth ghosting over yours; his unfiltered, gruffy grunts were music to your ears. You reached up, wanting to steal a kiss from him to taste his lips for the first time, but he slithered back.
“You don’t respect boundaries, do you?” Din rumbled.
His voice should have had a tinge of anger, but instead it sounded… amused?
“You have had a taste of me, it’s only fair I get something in return, Din,” you bargained breathlessly, but got no reply. “Please?”
Imploring for a measly kiss from your captor while he kept on fucking you. That had to be a new low in your book.
You couldn’t see him as he jackhammered you into the mattress, but knew he was debating. Whatever inner debate he had, the side you were banking on won.
“You keep your hands on my back at all times. Yes?” One of his hands moved to your neck, his dextrous fingers wrapping around your throat. “Or I’ll―”
“Kill me. I know. Elek, Alor (yes, Master),” you whispered in Mando’a, breath hitching.
His mouth came crashing down on yours, teeth colliding in a very messy kiss. His tongue sought yours with fervour and sucked it into his mouth. He tasted like you.
You couldn’t help but moan in midst of the sloppy kiss, your heart finally content at his small yet meaningful surrender. The grip of his hand around your neck softened but didn’t dissolve, adding another layer of excitement to his unabating thrusts.
“Gar serim, cyar’ika (that’s it, beloved). You’re so good, so fucking good for me. Warm, tight pussy always ready for me when I need her. She never disappoints,” he maundered, your brain spiralling with his praise.
Praising your cunt, not actually you, but you would take anything he would give you.
A few minutes later, the breathy groans of your making out along with the squelching sounds of your lust filled the air, quickly followed by the loud moans announcing your climaxes. Your cunt clamped on Din’s dick―a promise you’d never let him go―and he blew his load inside you. The tackiness of his cum filled your insides as his cock pulsed one last time and his lips pecked yours.
Din dropped to your side, panting with exhaustion, and you just laid there pondering all the decisions that had taken you there.
You’d never let him go.
When the fuck did that happen?
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“How long does winter last here?”
“A good part of the year, around six months,” he replied dryly.
He was aware of the fact that you had been trying to get words out of him for the past week. Make conversation, talk about his story, his past, his interests. See if there was any common ground between you. But Din couldn’t bring himself up to actually share personal details.
And every time you tried, and he would dodge your attempts, he would see the disappointment painted across your face. And every time, something unknown would uncomfortably stir within him. He suspected you had started to harbour feelings for him ― and even if he wanted to, he couldn’t reciprocate you. Didn’t want to break your heart.
It was his fault, really, for seeking you out every night. You were so giving and him so greedy, he just mindlessly took what you offered without giving you anything in return except for a few orgasms and a good time.
“What did you do last winter? Bet it was boring being home with just the droids…”
Din knew very well what answer you were expecting: It was. Your presence has been a great improvement. You make my days―and nights―more bearable.
But instead, he shrugged.
“Dunno. Kept myself busy with stuff,” he muttered frugally.
He kept on walking before you, making the way back home after a quick stroll around to breathe some cold, fresh air.
The Mandalorian did not expect to be attacked by a snowball, which hit the back of his helmet. He quickly turned around.
“What the hell are you―?”
Before he could finish his question, you hit him again with another snowball, dead centre on his visor.
“You are such a prick, Din Djarin,” you snapped between gritted teeth, patting another snowball between your gloved hands. “Would it actually kill you to be a bit more open, hm?”
This time he saw the attack coming and was able to duck, avoiding the next snowball.
“Are you mad?”
“Yes, I’m mad, you fucking idiot!” you yelled at him, trudging forwards with another snowball on hand. “I’m mad for you, but either you’re fucking blind or you’re a cold-hearted jerk.”
Little did you know he was actually blind in one eye, but it didn’t seem to be the time to point it out.
The sudden love confession caught him off guard. You were not supposed to say that. You were not supposed to feel that way, not for him.
Din remained calm as you cut the distance and tried to smash the fourth snowball on his covered face. His fingers gripped your wrist before you were able to do so.
“You’re just confused, mesh’la. All the sex is blindsiding you, but you really don’t feel anything for me,” he reasoned.
You looked at him as if he had slapped you and took a step back.
“Of course, because you, the freaking Tin Man with a dead heart, know better than myself how I feel. Un-fucking-believable, honestly. Go fuck yourself, Din,” you scoffed, pushed him to one side and walked past him.
Din saw you disappear through the sliding door, while he stood there in disbelief.
What the fuck had just happened?
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You kind of expected Din not to show up at your door tonight, but his absence in your bed stung either way. Sure, you had told him to go fuck himself, but now with a new―horny―perspective, you would prefer if he fucked you instead.
Infuriated with him, yourself and the situation, you sat back up on your empty bed. You reached for the drawer in your nightstand and opened it, grabbing the star compass inside. Fidgeting with the aurodium clasp, you wondered why the fuck Din didn’t open up. After three months and a half with him, you had thought you had been able to break through his armour ― the figurative one, not the real one.
Every time you tried to talk about your relationship with him, Din would shut you out or wouldn’t even engage in the conversation at all. He was more stubborn than a falumpaset, and that was saying something. Despite his indifference, you believed that, deep down in that cold, dead heart of his, he cared for you. Maybe he didn’t love you, but at least cared for you.
You didn’t even know if you loved him, anyway. Infatuated was, most probably, more accurate, you’d like to think. Most days you pushed that thought to the remotest corner of your mind, not wanting to consider it. Because, after all, you were his prisoner ― you might forget it some days, but the reality was that Din Djarin was your captor. So maybe it wasn’t love ― perhaps it was just a survival mechanism. Keep your friends close and your enemies closer.
Amid your pondering, you almost didn’t realise that the hands of the compass had moved, and the lodestone was humming, the plasma inside slowly swirling around. Your heart jolted in your ribcage, almost dropping to your stomach, when you finally paid it attention.
“Shit!” you exclaimed, jumping out of bed.
You had hoped it would work once it fully dried, but you were not expecting it to be actually functioning. It seemed to sense the Force emitted by the Darksaber, but that couldn’t be possible. If the Darksaber was here, in Mandalore, Din would know―would have told you. Right?
No, he wouldn’t have.
With that thought in mind, you put on some more decent clothes and cracked open your door. Carefully, you peeked in the corridor to confirm the coast was clear. It was close to midnight, so you hoped everyone―Din and the droids―would have gone to rest.
Tiptoeing through the hallway, you followed the path the star compass was pointing to, only to find yourself in the west wing after a few minutes. You knew you shouldn’t be here, but the compass hummed louder, vibrating on the palm of your hand, as you turned another corner. Looking up from your family’s relic, you saw a door at the end of the hallway.
“BEEP BEEEEEEEEEEEEP BOOP! BIP! PIP!” Din’s astromech robot, an old R2-D2 unit, screeched at you loudly, skidding and coming to a halt in front of you. It even had a red light flashing at you.
You almost threw your heart up there and then, the little robot giving you the biggest scare of your life.
“CA’NARA!” you told him off as your heartrate slowed down. “Fucking hell, you almost killed me, little devil.”
“BEEP! PIPIPIPI!” the droid beeped at you, going around you in circles.
“I know I shouldn’t be here, sorry!” you whispered, “I-I’m a sleepwalker!”
Ca’nara seemed to calm down, only for Nau’ul to appear in scene.
Great, fucking great.
“Ca’nara, what’s going on?” the protocol droid turned the corner, almost bumping into you. “Oh! What are you doing here?”
“I- Uhm, I was just telling Ca’nara that I’m a sleepwalker. He literally just woke me up. I didn’t mean― you know I cause no trouble, Nau’ul,” you pleaded with the affable droid.
“Of course, of course,” he took a couple of stiff steps back. “What’s that on your hand?”
Fuck. You looked down, coming up empty with a lie.
“I don’t know. I literally just woke up, I don’t know where I got it from,” you stammered a bit, but the droid didn’t pick up on it.
“I’ll take it. Alor will know what it is and where it belongs,” Nau’ul extended his hand towards you.
If you didn’t give it up, it would arouse suspicion. So, unwillingly, you passed it on to him.
“Where’s he?” the question slipped your tongue before you could refrain.
“Alor is… indisposed, miss. He needs to rest,” he replied cryptically as you both walked back to the main corridor where your bedroom was.
“Indisposed? Is he sick? Is he okay?” you instantly worried.
“He’ll be better in the morning, fret not,” he paused in front of your room, and you opened the door. “Goodnight.”
“Goodnight, Nau’ul,” you mumbled before closing the door behind you.
What a varping disaster. Nau’ul had confiscated your star compass, which meant that Din would eventually see it. If it came to it, you were not sure what you would do. And you still didn’t know what was in that room, why the compass had gone crazy as you approached it. But you had a pretty good idea. Chances were, the Darksaber was on the other side of that door at the end of the west corridor.
Sighing, you sauntered towards the big window in your room. Two perfectly aligned full moons dominated the night sky, their white, sparkly glow bouncing off the walls. It was a beautiful sight.
Something in the path below caught your attention. A metallic reflection. Your eyes drifted down just in time to see Din running towards the Civic Center, as if a thousand ghosts were on his heels.
You frowned, confused. Where was he going at this witchy hour? Wasn’t he sick?
A scary thought formed in your head. Were you under attack? Had Ash come looking for you after several weeks without returning his messages?
Heart pounding with worry, you darted to the door and then the lift. Whatever threat was coming, you would face it with him. With such resolution in mind, you followed his trail.
Your concern for him skyrocketed when you arrived at the Civic Center and saw nothing but pieces of his armour scattered around. You snatched the shin and thigh armour off the steps to the main door, only to look up and find more bits spread around the entryway.
This made no sense at all. Why would Din dispose of his armour? Something was wrong, very wrong, but you were not under attack.
You gathered all the armour pieces in your arms while calling his name but heard nothing except the whistling of wind passing through cracks and crannies.
Suddenly, you felt the need to look down the stairs to the Living Waters. A hunch rooting in your core, wrapping around your heart. Then a faint, painful growl came from underneath and all your senses flared alive.
What was Din doing down there? In the Mythosaur’s lair?
Panic hiked up your throat as you hiked down the stairs, the animalistic snarl louder now as you drew nearer. At the bottom of the steps, eyes fixed on your shoes, you dared to glance up.
His armour fell from your arms on to the ground, clattering. You were not prepared to see what you found.
Din was half curled up on the floor, naked and dragging himself towards the water. Only he was way bigger ― almost seven feet tall, his body much more muscular with chiselled, blueish veins across the whole of him, hands big as paws with his nails digging the dirt underneath.
You took a step forward, catching a better glimpse of him. Then you truly saw ― his skin had a viridescent tint to it and had started to scale. Rugged lumps raised from the skin on his back, tiny bones protruding through. No, not bones ― small horns, like those of a reptile.
Not like a reptile. Like a Mythosaur. Only smaller than the beast you saw a few weeks ago.
With a guttural bellow, he removed his helmet, throwing it to on side as he crawled towards the rippling water. His head was crowned by thick, short, greyish curls ― exactly what you had imagined.
“Din?” you whispered, taking a precautious step towards him, one hand extended in front of you to appease him.
His head snapped around at the sound of your voice.
You gasped at the sight of him. What first struck you was the scar across his face, one that would perfectly line up with the mended crack on his helmet. It ran diagonally through his rugged features, distorting them and hugging that crooked nose. His teeth seemed slightly pointier too. The next thing you noticed were his blown, bloodshot eyes with pupils as big as his sclerae.
Not eyes, one eye ― the right one was completely discoloured, covered in a white sheen.
He still looked like Din, but… not really.
The vision in front of you should have scared you. Even more so when Din stared at you, and you saw nothing in his expression ― he didn’t recognise you. Whoever, or whatever, this was, he wasn’t the man that had kept you company for the last few months.
Logic dictated you should run in the opposite direction. Instead, you propelled forwards towards him, knees skidding on the dirt and landing by his side.
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The warm touch of an alien hand grounded him for an ephemeral instant. The bitter cold crawled under his scaled skin, rejecting the heat like a limping animal avoiding the helping hand of a human.
He snarled, creeping back and away from you, as if your mere proximity was a threat to him.
Because it was.
“Din, I’m here, let me help you,” you besought, dragging your knees towards him again.
He didn’t know who Din was. Where he was or had gone. Did he ever exist? The Beast didn’t know―didn’t care. So he growled again, but his futile attempt didn’t keep you at bay. Guessed you had a death wish, only that could explain your blatant refusal to his rejection.
Both your hands fell upon him, like warm blood spilling and enlivening his senses. For once the cold running wild through his veins minimised, giving way to a hot flush that was foreign to him. The sudden warmth surprised him ― but what shocked him the most was how soothing it was, how easy was for him to crave your touch. A primal need.
The Beast had forgotten what warmth was, having been cursed to a lifetime of coldness for as long as he could remember. Crazed by this newfound feeling, he slowly sat back up on the ground, eyeing you like a predator watching his prey.
Your hand reached up to him to cradle his cheek and the Beast closed his eyes, that warm feeling running down his neck, wrapping around his dead yet beating heart.
“You’re so cold,” you mumbled as you cut the distance some more, your chest nudging his side.
Another heatwave flashed through him ― your warmth beckoning, your body too inviting. He wanted to dive in, to let your warmth surround him, make him surrender. He craved it so bad, so fiercely, the Beast bowed down to sink his forked tongue in your mouth ― unannounced, unrequited.
You moaned at the intrusion, your hands lacing on the nape of his neck, and that only spurred him on. He gave in to your warmth and gave up his restraints. Growling, he plundered your mouth as he forced you down onto the ground.
Towering above you, his tongue slipped out of your mouth to graze your neck, and you shivered under him. Biting your chin, he returned to your lips to kiss you, to suck out your warmth to replenish himself. Like a leech he drank from you while his rough, broad hands roamed your body.
“Din,” you mewled.
He didn’t like this Din whose name you were moaning. So he kissed you, not wanting to hear it again and tugged at your clothing. Impatient, he almost tore your garments apart and only relaxed a little when you were completely naked beneath him.
Pressing his bare body against yours, he revelled, soaking in your heat. But there was a part of you that was hotter, and he could sense it ― like a tracking fob, he pursued the warm feeling as he slithered down your frame.
The heat pulsing from between your thighs called him home, hypnotising. You pressed your knees together and he snarled, his sight darting to your glassy, dreamy eyes, silently distraught at your denial.
He leaned down over you to graze one of your nipples, smothering it raw to show you what he could do to you down in your balmy core. His demonstration worked, because the next time he coaxed your legs apart, you showed no resistance.
So down he went on you, fingers splaying out your puffy folds to display the focal point of his desire. Like a thirsty animal his bifid tongue darted out and swept the length of your damp slit in one slow, sweet sweep. He howled into your pussy, besotted, his arms wrapping around your thighs as he devoured your seeping cunt. Warmth poured from your clit, and he latched onto it rather harshly, finally finding the beacon that reeled him in.
“Fuck, that― Mhmm,” whatever you were going to say died in your lips as a moan hitched in your throat and your body trembled.
A rush of liquid fire met his tongue, and he accepted your offering as your thighs quivered around him ― the strength of your release eased slowly, but his tongue didn’t.
His fingers found the warm cave he needed to nestle in. But before he could do that, before his brain got fucked out into oblivion, he had to prepare you to take him. He massaged your leaking entrance one digit at a time until you were sweetly stretched around four of his fingers.
You whimpered with the first pump and slowly you eased into it, into the feeling of being full to the brim. He licked and flicked your throbbing clit, the hot nub driving him wild. Your inner walls tightened, announcing another climax, and he pulled it out of you with his fist still immersed in your pussy.
Once you came down from your high, the Beast unburied from between your thighs and loomed over you. Your half-lidded eyes and fucked-out expression only made him harder, hotter. He hungered for the moment your bodies would connect; the moment he would finally feel only warmth running through his veins. The moment the cold was forgotten, albeit only fleetingly.
The tip of his cock nudged at your pliant entrance, and he trailed the head up and down your dewy furrow a few times. Your eyes blew open the moment he poked at your hole, parting your flesh, and you looked down at his dick kissing the mouth to your cave.
“Din, I don’t think― Oh, holy FUCK,” you mumbled something uncoherent afterwards, head tilted back and your teeth sinking in your bottom lip as your pleading metamorphosed into moaning.
His whole frame blanketed yours as he supported his weight off you by placing his forearms to either side of your head.
Slowly, inch by inch, he buried himself in you, suffocating heat radiating from where you two met. He growled, an animalistic bellow bubbling up his throat as he felt your walls swallowing him, sheathing his throbbing cock. And when he was fully embedded in you, buried almost down to the hilt, you whined as he remained still ― your walls adjusting around him. He was maddened by the warmth of you.
Only when he felt you relax around him, did he start pumping in and out of you. His mind went blank as his sight transfixed on yours and your foreheads touched, another bridge between you. The Beast rutted into you, first paced, then madly, as he stared into your soul. Your body rocked up and down underneath him, your back arched so your nipples caressed the bare skin of his chest.
The movement of water behind him made him look over his shoulder. The Great Mythosaur had resurfaced, only the top of his head and his eyes were above the water table. Watching, ever present and lurking. Eager. Wanting.
He growled at him, a warning to back the fuck down ― he wasn’t sharing you; you were all for himself and himself only. His exclusive prey, no one else’s. With a low rumble, the Great Mythosaur disappeared under the water, and he refocused on you.
Tension built up at the base of his spine, his cock pulsating so hard it was difficult to ignore it any longer. And then your pussy clenched around him as you orgasmed once more, and that inevitably milked him dry ― both of you moaning in unison as ropes of thick, white cum painted your inner walls, leaving a lasting imprint in your core.
The Beast panted above you ― all coldness deserted from his body, destituted by your unique warmth.
He sat back up, his engorged cock leaving your entrails. Through the daze in your eyes, you looked at him with a satisfied grin. As you sat up straight, you lifted one hand towards him, softly placing it on the center of his chest.
“Come back to me, Din,” you begged, and all hell broke loose within him.
The pain, the shearing pain, blinded all his senses as his bones snapped and rearranged again. His jaw clenched to stop the agonising screams hiking up his throat. Din hunkered down as his body adjusted back to normal size.
As grievous as it was, it was over very quickly. Too quickly. He had not fully transformed into the Beast, which meant easing out of it was not as traumatic.
What was traumatic was the sudden landslide of overwhelming feelings taking form inside him. Almost a decade of apathy meant years’ worth of emotions repressed ― emotions that would emerge to the surface if given the opportunity. And whatever you unleashed within him, flooded his brain and his heart.
A myriad of sentiments rushed through him ― joy, anger, hope, disappointment, serenity, desperation. All at once, a cacophony bursting his eardrums. So loud were his emotions, all boiling together inside him, his thoughts were drowned. He couldn’t think ― panic was setting in.
Din panted as his arms and legs trembled uncontrollably, lungs vacating all oxygen in sharp exhales. His ears rang and his heart threatened to climb up his throat and run. Eyes closed shut, he grasped for control.
“Din, I’m here,” your hands slid on his back, grabbing him by the shoulders.
A soothing balm taking many of his worries away. Your palms smoothing out his skin felt like an anchor. One he desperately tried to hold onto.
Through the fog of his anxiety, he saw you knelt by his side, hugging him close. Naked as he was, a sweaty patina clinging to your skin. Although Din had not been in possession of his own body, he had been relegated to the background and had been witness to everything that happened. Forced to watch him take you.
He felt sick to his stomach.
“I’m sorry. I can’t control him, I just―,” he wheezed as he sat back up.
Your soft eyes sparkled, a faint smile curling up your lips. Your fingers snaked through his hair, combing it back.
“You have nothing to be sorry for, Din,” you hugged him tighter, reassuring, kissing one of his shoulders.
“Are you hurt? Did I― did he…?”
“I’m completely fine. A bit… sensitive and raw. But in a good way,” you added with a faint chuckle.
The comforting caress of your hand rubbing his back and your lips brushing the skin on his shoulder made him believe you.
Even though the look in your eyes had not changed, he could see the questions dancing in your pupils. Questions you were holding back, but that would eventually spurt out.
Your free hand reached for his left cheek, and he almost flinched at the proximity. Your thumb had come too close to the scar, sending a shot of pain down his neck. But he didn’t lean back away from you. Instead, Din stilled under your touch.
“I knew you’d be gorgeous underneath that helmet,” you whispered, your mouth close to his.
Din grunted, taking your compliment as an offense. Why were you mocking him? He knew how he looked ― he didn’t need you making fun of him for it.
And why was he upset? He shouldn’t. He couldn’t.
Your tiny fingers wrapped around his wrist when he reached for the helmet nearby. You yanked his forearm until his eyes met yours.
“I wasn’t joking. I mean it, Din. Truly,” you husked, hand again on his cheek and thumb too close for comfort.
He couldn’t see a sliver of jest in your features. You were deadpan serious. And that scared him.
Din looked away, coming to terms with the flaring emotions. Emotions. Even the unspoken word tasted weird on his tongue.
You moved away from him to quickly gather your clothes and put them on. Then returned to his side with his armour and clothing.
“Let’s go back home, Din. You look knackered,” you mumbled, kneeling by his side again.
Din didn’t reject your aid when you helped him get dressed again. Taking the helmet between your hands, he bowed down his head so you could put it on for him.
His body ached in places he didn’t even know could hurt ― all the restructuring his bones had to endure always took a physical toll on him. So much so, he needed your help to stand up ― his legs felt like those of a newborn humbaba.
But today… today it also took an emotional toll on him.
He really was exhausted.
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You probably needed time to process what had happened tonight, a whirlwind of questions and doubts battered around in your mind. But you didn’t want to leave Din alone, not when he looked so fatigued, a moment away from breaking.
Walking down the silent corridor beside him, arm draped around his waist, you went past your room. You had never been to his and hoped tonight would be the night where he would let you spend it by his side.
Hand heavy on the handle, you pushed it down and the door swung open. You didn’t know what to expect and, somehow, the bareness of his room did not surprise you at all. The metalwork on the walls had been painted black and the furniture was sparse. A massive bed with black bedsheets dominated the room.
Despite the monochromatic theme, it felt cozy, inviting even. Dragging him towards the bed, you gently pushed him down on to the mattress and knelt in front of him to remove his boots.
“I can do it,” his words slurred.
“I know. But let me do it, please,” you muttered, throwing the shoes to one side.
Din hummed in agreement, so slowly you unfastened all the beskar pieces again. Removed the vest underneath and unzipped his body stocking down the side, helping him out of it.
There was something extremely intimate about undressing him. Not with a deprived end in mind, but a caring one.
I could do this forever. Only if you’d let me, the intrusive thought didn’t startle you. Because it was true.
Last, you placed your hands to either side of his helmet to pull it up. By pure instinct, his hands darted up to yours to stop you from uncovering his face.
“It’s okay, Din,” you reassured him softly.
Din crooned again, arms falling to his sides, surrendering, and you took it off, leaving it on the nightstand.
You could truly get used to this; you’d never tire of looking at him. His rugged features, although distorted by the nasty scar, were pleasant. His soft, brown and white eyes, the aquiline nose, the moustache blending in with the beard, the strong jaw. You only saw beauty, no beast.
Mando let himself fall backwards and you stood there by the side of the bed, unsure of what to do with yourself.
He decided for you.
“Stay, please,” he purred, half asleep by the time his head touched the pillow underneath.
He didn’t need to say more. Removing your clothes, you joined him under the bedlinen with a smirk.
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The first lights of the morning filtered through the big window in Din’s bedroom. You had been awake for an hour now, but he had been so peacefully sleeping, you didn’t want to disturb him.
A tangled mess of limbs you were, your legs intertwined with his while your right cheek rested on his bare chest. Your left forearm was splayed across his abdomen, the tips of your fingers mindlessly caressing his ribs.
Pressing a kiss to his left pec, he stirred under you, slowly coming out of his slumber. You hugged him tighter, an easy smile surfacing.
“Good morning,” you husked when he looked down at you with just his left eye open, lips slightly curled downwards.
His addled expression made you snicker as you kissed his jawline.
“Morning,” he hushed back once his brain registered your words.
“How are you feeling?”
“Better. Everything hurts, but I’m okay.”
The arm of his under you moved, bringing you closer to him in a half embrace.
“I know you have questions,” he said a few moments later.
“Understatement of the year,” you joked, lifting your head slightly up to rest your chin on his chest. “Is now a good time?”
“Might as well,” his reply was accompanied by a smirk.
“You didn’t transform fully last night, did you?”
Din shook his head. “No, just halfway. I think your presence stopped it from happening.”
Did that mean that you could soothe the beast? That you could help Din in a way that really mattered? The mere possibility filled your belly with butterflies.
“And, well, the most obvious one… How?” you emphasized the last word.
“A witch cursed me before I killed her,” you looked at him quizzically, eyebrows raised, and he sighed. “A man by the name of Moff Gideon had someone I held dear under his grasp. A kid I was fond of,” he paused to gather his thoughts while your breath hitched at the name of Moff Gideon. “I fought Gideon to free him. I won, but he had backup I did not see coming. A witch named Morgan Elsbeth. She came to his rescue and I ended up killing her. Her last breath cursed me to an existence of apathy and becoming a beast. Guess it worked,” he scoffed, shaking his head. “That was eight years ago and ever since then, my ability to feel has been dying out while the beast has only gotten stronger.”
Your head spun with so much information, you almost felt dizzy. Did Din fight Moff Gideon? Was it his halo you chased eight years ago?
“Is that how you got the crack on your helmet and the scar?” you ventured, heart pounding.
“Mhm,” was his only reply. “How I lost my right eye too.”
The helmet was made of beskar, one of the strongest alloys in the Galaxy. Only a weapon strong enough would be able to melt it. But you couldn’t push him for more details, or it would be suspicious.
And did it really matter? Did you care that much about the Darksaber? Yes, you had spent your whole life looking for it; yes, you had promised your dying father you would finish the mission. But that felt like a lifetime ago.
“What was the kid’s name? What happened to him?”
“Grogu. He is Force sensitive, he went to the Jedi for training,” he pursed his lips, and your fingers smoothed out the crow’s feet around his right eye.
“You miss him,” you hummed, your fingertips tracing imaginary lines on his skin.
“I didn’t think I did. Till now,” he confessed, stirring under you. “I don’t know, it’s weird. Since last night I have started to… feel again. And it’s overwhelming.”
Your heart did a little jump against your ribcage. If he could feel now, did he feel for you?
You were too scared to ask, so didn’t.
“Maybe the curse is fading?”
“Maybe,” he said back, sounding unconvinced. “You hungry?”
You nodded.
“I’ll go get something. Bet Nau’ul has prepared a feast. Whether it’s edible or not, I don’t know.”
You chuckled at the joke and moved off him so Din could get up. In silence, you watched him dress, his back muscles rippling with every movement.
Yes, you could get used to this.
Fuck the Darksaber. Fuck everything. You just wanted to live your life. With him. Here, in Mandalore. Only if he’d let you.
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It was selfish of you to think this way, but Din’s curse had become your blessing.
Every night since you discovered his secret, you’d go to his room and spend the hours of darkness with him. He would reluctantly take the helmet off, but each time you would reassure him he couldn’t scare you away, that what he thought he looked like didn’t matter in the slightest. And you meant every single word. In your eyes, he was perfect just the way he was.
There was still the issue of his Creed forbidding him, but you wondered if it was more habit than anything else.
And every full moon, you would follow him down to the Mythosaur lair to let him take you, excitement running through your veins every single time. You knew you shouldn’t enjoy it but allowing him to fuck you in beast form was exhilarating. Even with practice you had still not been able to take him fully ― his cock too big to bear. It was worse when you attempted a blowjob on him ― your jaw almost dislocated. But you were more than happy to try, obviously.
And of course, it helped him regulate, which was the most important point of all. He had told you he didn’t feel as cold either. Even if his body was hot to the touch, Din had explained how his organs, his blood, felt like icicles. Ever since the beast had had a taste of your warmth―Din’s words, not yours―it seemed like his feelings were slowly crawling back.
That had been interesting too. After so many years spent numb, Din had had a bit of trouble dealing with his emotions. Sometimes they were extreme, out of proportion even, but he was learning how to manage them. Although most days felt like one step forward and three back, especially when it was a touchy subject such as love.
You had tried, but Din was still of the idea that he couldn’t truly feel ― that this was just a glitch, a shortcut, but not the real thing. And because of his stupid theory, he didn’t want to hear you say anything about The Matter. You had seen how much he had improved, how much better he could deal with everything, and yet he wouldn’t listen to you in that respect.
You rolled your eyes, still thinking about it, as you trekked through the mud. It was a crispy morning, but the cold had started to recede. Poor Ca’nara had a faulty retractable third leg ― the inside mechanism was getting jammed regularly. You had decided to be proactive and walk to the landing site of your X-wing, in the hopes that some parts of your astromech droid were salvageable. An extremely long shot, yes, but you had to try at least.
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In full armour, Din sauntered towards the dining room, where the three droids seemed to be conferring about something.
None of them heard him coming, and Nau’ul startled dramatically when he saw him.
“Oh! Alor! What― Uh, do you want something to eat?” he asked, looking at Mrs. Kri’gee and Ca’nara nervously.
Din frowned, suspicious of their jumpy, evasive behaviour.
“No, I’m fine,” he mumbled as his eye caught a glimpse of something shiny Nau’ul was holding, trying to conceal it. “What’s that?”
“Ah, this? Well. You see, I― It’s― Nothing really. I don’t really know what―” his stammering was riling Din up.
He was a damn droid, not a fucking human. How could Nau’ul get edgier than himself? Unbelievable.
“Give,” he extended his hand towards the droid, palm up, and curled his fingers with impatience.
The three droids shared weird looks, but Nau’ul finally handed him the object.
Din turned around the metal item and as soon as he did, he recognised the beskar. Brows knitting, he inspected the grooves and quickly identified them as astromeridian lines. This was not a simple object; it was a Jedi star compass. Confused as to how this came to be in the possession of Nau’ul, Din unclasped the compass and lifted the lid.
His breathing hitched and his heart skipped a beat. This was not any star compass; this was the star compass. One that all Mandalorians believed to be a myth. But the black plasma in the lodestone didn’t lie. In his hand he was holding the very same star compass that Tarre Vizsla had commissioned to keep track of the Darksaber in case it ever got stolen.
“Where did you get this?” he snapped, fingers clutching the device tight.
“I― Well, it’s complicated. I thought―”
“It’s hers, isn’t it?” he interrupted.
The memory of that day trip to your ship came back to him. A locket, you had said. Bullshit.
Nau’ul nodded.
“How long have you had this?”
“Weeks, Alor. I did recognise it from the lore I knew about House Vizsla, but we didn’t want to worry you unnecessarily. She’s doing you good, Master, you’ve improved―”
“Unnecessarily? Are you for fucking real, Nau’ul?” Din replied angrily, teeth gritting.
Without expecting an answer, he turned around and stormed out of the room.
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You were kneeling on the ground, elbow’s deep in the core of your old R3-D3 unit, trying to reach a hidden screw, when you heard heavy steps approaching.
“Good you’re here, I can’t get to this screw. I’ve been at it for five minutes now. Can you try?” you asked Din, who stopped inches away from your back.
When he didn’t say a word, you turned around and glanced up at him.
He radiated tension through every pore, his posture stiff and shoulders squared. Eyebrows furrowed, you got up, cleaning the palm of your hands on your trousers.
“What’s the matter, Din?”
“This. Why did you have this?” his voice transpired how mad he felt as he handed you an object you quickly recognised.
The star compass that Nau’ul had confiscated from you weeks ago. You had assumed the droid didn’t know what it was and hadn’t bothered to show it to Din.
Your eyes shot up to where you knew his were.
“I can explain,” you reached for him, your fingers wrapping around his forearm.
“You better start talking now,” even if he hadn’t backed away from you, he felt so distant.
Your mind raced and your heart galloped inside your chest. You could lie your way out of this situation, but you didn’t want to. You loved him, and nothing else mattered. He would understand. Eventually.
“Din, listen to me, please. I’m not gonna lie to you: it is exactly what it looks like. My family, my tribe― we are trackers. Have been tracking the Darksaber for generations. I was raised to hate your people, but the message never really sunk in for me. Our purpose was to find the Darksaber and destroy it,” you explained while he remained deadly silent. “That was why I was travelling through the Mandalore system. I was tracking the Darksaber. I was going to Concordia, but I ran into technical problems with my X-wing and had to divert here. I think― I thought it was there.”
Until that night you sneaked out to the west wing. You had been caught before you could confirm your suspicions but were pretty sure that was what Din was hiding in the west wing. The reason he wouldn’t let you be anywhere nearby.
“But now you know it’s not in Concordia,” he finished for you.
You nodded.
“But I don’t care for it anymore, Din. Once I figured you likely had it, I made a choice. I chose you,” you whispered, closing in on him until your bodies met. “You have to believe me.”
He didn’t talk at all. Silence strung between you, dense and worrying, like a rope wrapping around your neck, forcing the oxygen out of your lungs. You didn’t want to panic, knowing that Din probably only needed time to think, to digest and ruminate.
Minutes went by and your grip on his forearm loosened. You were ready to take a step back, give him some space to process, when Din finally spoke in his modulated voice.
“I believe you,” a wave of relief washed over you, “and I choose you too.”
Your heart dropped to your stomach and then climbed up your oesophagus. It was beating so hard, so fast, you were seconds away from passing out.
He chose you.
Before you could throw your arms around his neck with pure elation, Din took a step back and one hand reached towards the back of his belt. Confused, you followed the movement of his hand, a deep wrinkle burrowing between your brows.
Din presented you a black hilt, waved it a little, and then the black and white blade appeared, humming very loudly, although dimmer than what you expected. Your eyes widened at the sight of the Darksaber ― the item your whole family had been searching for, right there, in front of you, an inch away from your fingers.
Lifting your right hand, you reached for it.
Suddenly, a firing sound broke the silence and, inexplicably, Din leaned forward towards you, the Darksaber dropping from his hand.
You held him by the elbows, not understanding what was happening, as his hands grasped for you. Then a second firing noise uprooted a painful groan from him while he almost dragged you to the floor.
“Din? Din!” you whispered, on your knees with him in your arms, as your hands roamed his body.
You felt the warm blood before you could see it and panic settled in fast. He was profusely bleeding from two gunshots on his back, right below the beskar piece that covered his six.
“No, no. Wait. What―” you sobbed as Din groaned, his consciousness drifting away.
You were losing him fast, and you didn’t even know how.
“Are you okay? Is he dead?”
A male voice came from behind a tree near the cliff. A voice you had not heard in a long while, but quickly recognised.
Ashton.
Blaster still pointing at Din, Ash had frozen several meters away from you. What was he doing here? How did he get here unnoticed? Why? Fucking why?
But none of those questions left your mouth, gutted as you were, holding onto Din, worried he would slip away from you. You couldn’t move, couldn’t talk, overwhelmed as you were.
Din stirred in your arms, and you saw the panic reflected in Ash’s eyes as he cocked the blaster in Din’s direction again. There was no time to think, to beg, to ask him to leave. To tell him you loved the man he was intent on killing.
So you did the only thing you could do. Your fingers found Din’s blaster in his holster, lifted it up, pointed to Ash, and shot.
The light beam flashed before it hit dead center between Ash’s eyes. He stumbled back and fell into the abyss behind him. And just like that, you had killed the only friend you had known.
You should have doubted your actions, but you didn’t. It all happened too quickly, and you had bigger worries than having killed one of the few people you cared about. Like losing the love of your life.
Dropping the blaster, you rushed to remove Din’s helmet.
“Din, please, just hold on. Please, stay with me. Please, don’t leave,” you screamed and cried, hands trembling and pressing on the wounds on his back.
His eyes fluttered open, only a tiny slit ― his gloved hand reached up, cradling your cheek.
“Cyar’ika,” he could barely talk. “Ni kar'tayl gar darasuum (I love you). Don’t cry. It’s okay.”
“No, no. NO. You ain’t saying goodbye. No,” your words slurred as your sobs intensified, your heart breaking into a myriad of tiny pieces.
You removed the glove of his hand to kiss the palm, your tears streaming between his fingers. Yours wrapped around his wrist, holding him there.
As you cried your eyes out, you noticed the Darksaber humming louder, almost deafening, and its light shining brighter. Its vibration called you, hearing your name inside your head. A Force deep within you awakening, beckoning you to touch it. A need as basic as breathing.
Through teary eyes, blinking fast, you gave in ― you grabbed it.
An electrifying sensation ran through you, all your muscles coiling at once. Your mind spiralled out of control, for a moment losing track of time and space. The Force was so intense, so primitive, you thought you would be obliterated by its magnitude.
When you could finally open your eyes, the blade had dimmed considerably and then it completely snuffed out. Your cries had not stopped though, so loud you almost missed Din’s voice.
“Mesh’la,” he rasped, trying to straighten his back, “you― you’re Force sensitive. You’ve used the Force of the Darksaber to heal me.”
Your wet eyes darted to him and then his wounds. Or where the wounds had been but no longer existed. Mouthing a gulp of air, you instantly dropped the Darksaber to hug him tight, crying louder than before.
“It’s okay. I’m fine. We’re okay,” he hushed, comforting you.
“I love you, Din,” you mumbled in the crook of his neck, relief running through you loosening your taut muscles. “Don’t you fucking dare die on me again or I’ll kill you myself.”
Din chuckled, one hand smoothing out your hair.
“Noted, cyar’ika.”
Cradling his handsome face, you pressed a kiss to his lips. Salty yet sweet. You kissed him again, looking for the solace of his tongue.
The wind carried some words you barely made out.
“Maker met.”
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Four full moons had come and gone, and the beast was no more.
Din’s curse was broken. For good. Forever.
You couldn’t have asked for anything else. Anyone else. You loved him and he loved you back ― he had shown you many times. Right as he was showing you now.
Your lips brushed his tummy right above his belly button, leaving a trail of kisses as you found your way back to his mouth. Din was laying on his back, his rough hands caressing the back of your thighs as you kissed his scar and then his right eye, lips soft as a cloud.
He didn’t flinch anymore whenever you touched the sensitive skin or his blind eye. Instead, he sighed, as if your caress was soothing, calming. As if you could take away the pain he felt sometimes.
You sat back up on top of him, straddling his hips as his mushroom head hitched in your entrance, his hands compelling you to impale yourself. But you didn’t ― not yet.
Instead, you leaned over a bit, taking the helmet off the nightstand. It was heavy. Curious to know what it felt like, you put it on. The padding inside was soft, your face snug. It was slightly claustrophobic, but also comforting. Weird.
“It suits you, cyar’ika. You should consider taking up the Creed,” he mumbled, eyes full of desire, of yearning. Of love.
You chuckled and stirred your hips above him, the tip of his cock going in ever so smoothly.
“For you, I just might, Din.”
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@baronessvonglitter @bishtrouille @natalieispunk @iknowisoundcrazy @almostfoxglove
482 notes · View notes
foreignjaykay · 2 months ago
Text
LOVE REVERBED - JJK [One Shot]
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Love Reverbed
You weren't looking for love. Not anymore.
But between the neon lights of NYC Mix Fest, the hum of a city that never slows down, and the lingering echo of a fleeting airport encounter, something shifts. A familiar voice on stage. A glance that lasts too long. A feeling you thought you had outgrown.
Maybe love doesn’t disappear. Maybe it just reverbs—waiting for the right moment to be heard again.
pairing: jungkook x reader
genre: r18+ (angst, fluff) minors do not interact!
word count: 13.1K words (IJBOL WHAT? i have never written these many words all together im cryin)
one shot warnings/misc: event planner!oc, musician!jk, he is in a band but not famous, event planner! jimin, mentions of the the members - musician!tae, musician!namjoon (cameoj!!), musician!yoongi, musician!hobi (side note JAY HOPE HAS BEEN WILDIN' ON DA TOUR), investment banker! mingyu, HEARTBREAK, BETRAYAL, CHEATING (you will find out!), FLUFF, TENSION, ANGST, FLIRTING LOL, failed situationships/talking stages, some cliches, yeah thats it.
notes: hello everyone, sorry for the delay BUT SHE IS HERE!! i hope you guys love this one shot. this is a lengthy one for me haha. edit - this is more of oc's journey and currently jk is just a part of it. extras might come soon!
let me know your thoughts here <3
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“Passport - check. Menus, coasters, floral vases - check, check” You saw all the collaterals around and once you spotted the vases in your luggage, smiled and said “Check!”
 “___ relax! You have everything you need to take there,” Your colleague, Jane, laughed and nudged your arm. “You’ve triple-checked everything, I swear. If the Don Julio bar isn’t perfect at the Mix Fest, it won’t be because of you.”
You sighed, the weight of the past weeks settling in your shoulders. “Just want it to go smoothly,” you muttered, zipping up your luggage - mentally checking everything the fourth time. “Especially after…” you trailed off, the unspoken words lingering in the air.
Jane’s expression softened. “He’s not worth another thought, you know that. Besides, New York! Girl, think of all the distractions.” She knew how badly you need that distraction.
You managed to give a weak smile. “Distractions are exactly what I need.”
It had been two weeks since your third situationship had ended. It wasn’t really even about the situationships anymore. They were just a way to, you know, distract yourself. Funny how you needed a distraction from the distraction. 
You shook your head, not wanting to think about these thoughts anymore. "Come on, we need to head to the airport," Jane called from the living room. While being your colleague, you were thankful Jane was also your roommate.
You always thought how were you doing life before you met her?
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“Is Jimin meeting us directly at the airport?” You asked Jane as you put the luggage on the trolley, biting your lip, while Jane paid for the cab. 
God, you loved airports. The air in the terminal crackled with the static of announcements, a constant hum punctuated by the clatter of rolling suitcases. You took a deep breath of the recycled terminal air, and smiled. Everything about it just soaked you in. You didn't look at the airport as goodbye or whatever cliche thoughts people had or rather what movies made it sell. Airports always were a pit point of adventures. You loved the journey more than the destination.
 “Uh..” she trailed off, looking around. Then, when she finally spotted Jimin, she smiled, pointing towards a figure with blonde hair, waving enthusiastically. “There he is,” she said.
“Hello girls! Ready for the best weekend of your life or what?” Even at 7am Jimin was enthusiastic. A trait you and Jane seemed to lack.
 Noticing your and Jane’s expressions, he deflated slightly. “Oh come on. It’s New York.” He said, like that was supposed to solve everything.
You suppressed a small, tired smile. If you were truly honest, a flicker of excitement was there, buried beneath the exhaustion and the lingering weight of… well, everything.
Jimin, undeterred, threw an arm around your shoulder, a gesture that was more about his own excitement than any real comfort. “Imagine,” he said as his hands gestured wildly. “The guys! Oh, the guys! Picture this: chiseled jaws, smoldering eyes, every single one of them falling at our feet! Or, you know, the girls, if that's your thing. Glamorous, sophisticated, practically throwing themselves at us!”
You raised an eyebrow, a silent “really?”
Both him and Jane burst out laughing with Jimin giving your shoulder a quick, apologetic squeeze. “Okay, okay, I’m exaggerating a bit. But still! The energy, the food, the Mix Fest… it’s going to be amazing.” 
Mid conversation, you felt your phone vibrate but you ignored it.
Jane, already shifting her weight impatiently, cut in. “Let’s just get through security. My caffeine levels are dangerously low, and I’m starting to see things.”
Inside the terminal, the air was that familiar mix of recycled chill and faint jet fuel. You dragged your luggage to a trolley, the wheels rattling unevenly. The line for security was a slow-moving river of sleep-deprived faces and overstuffed backpacks.
The security process was the usual dance – laptop out, liquids in a bag, shoes off. You walked through the scanner, then beep a dull, familiar sound. On the other side, you fumbled with your shoes, the laces feeling stiff and unfamiliar. You watched Jane and Jimin, their banter a low hum in the background, a comforting, if slightly annoying, constant. You were ready for this weekend, even if you weren't fully aware of it yet.
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The plane’s engines roared, a deep, guttural sound that vibrated through your seat. You were thankful you luckily had no one sitting next to you in the middle seat.
 You pressed your forehead against the cool, slightly scratched window, with your neck pillow, watching as Seoul’s sprawling cityscape receded, transforming into a miniature tapestry of lights. Window seat, always, you thought, a wry smile tugging at the corners of your lips. Your phone, its memory perpetually teetering on the brink of overload, was clutched in your hand, the camera app already open. Another travel video to add to the collection, you mused, knowing full well your storage was a lost cause. The click of the record button was automatic, a familiar ritual.
However after recording which looked like the 5th take, your hands instinctively went to the messages app and there it was. A text sitting from Mingyu.
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A wave of something, a mix of anger and exhaustion, washed over you. Seriously? you thought, the word a silent, incredulous question. He’s really doing this.
"Sorry baby." The pet name, once a source of warmth, now felt like a cold, slimy thing. It was like he was trying to push a button, and he knew exactly which one to push. Seven months. Seven months since you'd found out about the beach trip, the "business meeting," the her. And now, this. At 7 a.m., no less. How did he even know you were traveling? It wasn't a coincidence. Mingyu wasn't a coincidence kind of guy. He was calculated, always had been. That was how he had been able to cheat. To plan it, to execute it, to lie. That was the real problem, it wasn't a mistake, it was a plan.
You stared at the screen, your thumb hovering over the reply button, then the delete button. You just stared. What could you even say? What was there left to say? 
No matter how many times you asked him to not text you, he still did at several intervals. You couldn’t block him. You had tried, really tried, but just couldn't do it. So you ignored him.
A sigh escaped your lips, a sound lost in the hum of the plane. You closed your eyes, the image of his face, his smile, the way he’d looked at her, flashing behind your eyelids. Your mind did take you to the past. The place you didn’t want to go and before you knew it, you were pulled into the memory.
"Babyyyy, let me help you pack,"  you murmured, a soft smile playing on your lips as he stirred in the warm tangle of sheets. Mingyu's head was nestled in the curve of your neck, his breath a gentle caress against your skin. A low, sleepy groan rumbled in his chest, a familiar sound that usually led to a lazy, affectionate morning.
He shifted, his lips brushing against your neck in a soft, lingering kiss. "Mmm, five more minutes," he mumbled, his voice thick with sleep, his arms tightening around you.
You chuckled, gently stroking his hair. "Come on, sleepyhead. Your flight leaves in a few hours."
He reluctantly lifted his head, his eyes still half-closed, a soft, almost hazy look in them. "Fine, fine," he grumbled, but a playful smile tugged at his lips. "But only because I love you."
After the two of you had breakfast, you got up to help him pack.
He watched as you started pulling clothes from the closet, carefully folding them into his suitcase. "Let me help," you offered, reaching for a pile of his favorite shirts.
"No, it's okay," he said, a little too quickly, his hand moving to intercept yours. "I've got it." He placed the shirts back in the closet.
He moved to stand infront of the suitcase, blocking it from your view. "You know you have that blue shirt I like, packed right?" He asked, not moving.
A flicker of unease danced in your stomach. It wasn't like him to be so insistent. Usually, he'd be all over letting you help him, eager to make your life easier. "Are you sure? I don't mind," you said, your voice laced with a hint of confusion. Why was he being so weird about this?
"Yeah, I'm sure," he said, forcing a smile that didn't quite reach his eyes. "You know I hate seeing you stressed before I travel. I've been working so hard lately. I need to focus on this trip."
He moved away from the suitcase, and sat on the edge of the bed. You shrugged it off. He was an investment banker, you reminded yourself, long hours and endless meetings were part of his job. He was probably just tired. But the tiny niggle of unease refused to fully leave you.
Two days later, you were on the phone with him, his voice sounding distant and strained. "Just a few more meetings," he'd said, "and I'll be back. I miss you."
“I miss you too. I love you.” You remember saying but you felt a pit in your stomach.
“Me too,” he said. It felt flat, like he didn’t mean it.
Once you hung up the call, that strange sense of unease settled in your stomach. It was a feeling you couldn't quite place, a knot of anxiety that tightened with each passing moment.
You opened Instagram, scrolling through stories to distract yourself. Changbin’s name flashed on the screen. Changbin. You'd never really liked him. There was something about his smug grin and his sharp, dismissive comments that always rubbed you the wrong way.
Your finger hovered over the screen, a moment of hesitation before you pressed play.
The story opened on a sun-drenched beach, the turquoise water sparkling in the sunlight. The sound of laughter, a clinking of glasses. Your breath hitched. Then, the camera panned, revealing a group of people lounging on beach chairs. Mingyu.
Your breath hitched. He was there, on a beach, not in a boardroom. And then you saw her. A girl with sun-kissed skin and a wide, beaming smile, sitting on Mingyu’s lap, her hand resting casually on his thigh. Another girl was sitting with Changbin. It looked like a couples trip.
The world seemed to tilt on its axis. The phone slipped from your numb fingers, clattering to the floor. The image of Mingyu and the girl, their laughter echoing in your ears, was a cruel, sharp blow. He lied, you thought, the word a hollow echo in your mind. He lied to me. The feeling of betrayal was so strong, it was almost physical.
You immediately opened your eyes, not wanting to think about it. When you touched your face, you felt the tears.
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After the flight landed, the surge of passengers flooded the terminal and walked towards the baggage belt.
“I had the best sleep ever,” Jane mumbled as she adjusted her purse strap. You nodded your head and smiled.
“God I’m hungry. Before going to the venue, I am gonna have a nice shower and eat my heart out,” Jimin said while walking next to you.
You were eager to get your luggage and head to the hotel, the buzz of NYC already palpable. You navigated the crowd, trying to keep up with Jane and Jimin who were already in their own world, gossiping, when suddenly, you bumped into someone.
“Oh, sorry!” you blurted out, instinctively stepping back.
Your eyes met his. Even with the black cap and mask obscuring part of his face, you could see the warmth in his eyes. He was wearing a checkered shirt, a pattern that seemed to suit him perfectly, a bit casual, a bit…rock and roll. He had a guitar case slung over his shoulder.
“No problem,” he said, his voice a low, melodic rumble. “My fault, really.”
For a moment, time seemed to slow. There was something familiar in his gaze, a spark of recognition that you couldn’t quite place. You noticed the way his eyes crinkled slightly, even with the mask.
Then, just as quickly as it began, the moment was over. He nodded, a slight tilt of his head, and continued walking.
You stood there, slightly dazed, watching him disappear into the crowd. A musician, definitely. The checkered shirt, the guitar case, it all fit. Your type, if you were still… you know. But you weren’t. Not anymore.
“Come on, ___,” Jane said, pulling you by the arm. “Luggage claim’s that way.”
As you walked, you couldn’t shake the feeling that something had shifted, a subtle tremor in the air. You glanced back, but he was gone. Just another face in the sea of arriving passengers. Just another fleeting moment.
It's not always you see handsome strangers. You also loved the airport because imagine having that airport crush and bam you never see them again. This should be counted as that.
You pushed the thought away, focusing on the task at hand. New York. Don Julio setup. The Mix Fest. That was your reality now. No room for distractions. Especially not the kind that came with warm brown eyes, a checkered shirt, and a guitar case.
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The taxi, a yellow blur against the twilight canvas of New York City, deposited you, Jane, and Jimin in front of The Ludlow. Stepping out, you stretched, a groan escaping your lips. "Man, that flight felt like it was never going to end," you muttered, pulling your carry-on from the trunk.
"Tell me about it," Jane agreed, rubbing her neck. "I swear, my neck pillow just made things worse."
You noticed Jimin was quiet which was very unlike him. “You okay?” Concern laced on your features as you took back the change from the taxi driver while mumbling a ‘thank you’.
“Yeah, yeah, I just need sleep. The guy next to me snored so loudly that I couldn’t sleep. At all,” He rolled his eyes and gave a tired smile.
As the three of you entered the hotel, the lobby of The Ludlow was a masterclass in curated cool, a symphony of exposed brick, plush velvet seating, and strategically placed lights casting a warm, inviting glow. 
The check-in process was quick and efficient. "Room 502 for you two, and 504 for you, Mr. Park," the receptionist said, handing over the keys.
While entering the elevator of the hotel, Jimin couldn’t help but say, ”This place is so cool," Jimin observed, his eyes wide. "Definitely an upgrade from our usual."
"Speak for yourself," Jane retorted, playfully shoving him. "I'm used to the finer things in life."
“The budget for this event is definitely high,” You laughed and tapped your key card and then pressed the floor no on the elevator.
Once the three of you exited the elevator and searched around for your rooms, "Alright, ladies," Jimin declared, grabbing his suitcase. "I'll see you at the venue. I need to unpack and… you know, groom."
"Groom?" Jane raised an eyebrow. "You mean check your hair for split ends?"
"Hey!" Jimin protested, feigning offense. "A man's gotta look his best!"
“Alright both of you,” you chuckled. “Jimin, we will see you in an hour?” He laughed and nodded.
You and Jane headed to your suite, a spacious room with a view that made you catch your breath. The two of you shared spacious suite, a minimalist haven of clean lines and floor-to-ceiling windows offering a breathtaking panorama of the city skyline, a tapestry of twinkling lights against the inky blackness
 "Wow," you breathed, walking over to the floor-to-ceiling windows. "This is incredible."
 "I could get used to this," Jane said, plopping down on one of the beds. "First order of business: shower. Second: nap. Third: find the mini-bar."
"Sounds like a plan," you agreed, grabbing your toiletry bag. "I'm going to jump in the shower first. You can raid the mini-bar while I'm in there."
As you entered the bathroom, the cool, smooth porcelain of the bathroom sink greeted your fingertips as you leaned against it, the mirror reflecting a weary version of yourself. The journey, the anticipation, the ever-present weight of Mingyu’s lingering texts – it had all coalesced into a knot of tension in your shoulders. You needed a moment, a physical and mental cleansing. "Shower first," you muttered to yourself, echoing Jane's earlier declaration.
The click of the shower knob was a small, decisive sound, a promise of release. As the water began to cascade, you adjusted the temperature, seeking that perfect hot water balance. The kind of temperature that is relaxing but also the temperature is very high. You stripped off your travel-worn clothes, the soft fabric falling to the cool tile floor, a tangible shedding of the day's layers.
Slowly the much needed warmth enveloped you, a comforting embrace that eased the tightness in your muscles. The sound of the water, a constant, rhythmic drumming against the tile, filled the small space, creating a private world within the bustling city.
As the water streamed down your face, you closed your eyes, letting the physical sensation wash over you. The scent of the hotel’s lemongrass-infused shampoo filled your nostrils, a clean, invigorating aroma that momentarily pushed aside the lingering mental clutter. You tilted your head back, letting the water trace paths down your skin, each droplet a tiny, fleeting caress.
But even here, in the supposed sanctuary of the shower, Mingyu’s presence lingered. His face, the way his eyes crinkled when he smiled, the soft timbre of his voice – these memories, once sources of comfort, now felt like shards of glass – sharp and painful. You remembered the way he used to pull you close, the feeling of his arms around you, a warmth that now seemed like a cruel illusion.
Why? The question echoed in your mind, a silent scream in the quiet space. Why did you do this? Why did you lie? Why did you break my trust? The questions swirled, unanswered, like the steam rising from the hot water.
You reached for the body wash, the fragrant gel a temporary balm for the emotional wounds. As you lathered your skin, your mind automatically focused on the physical sensations – the slickness of the gel, the warmth of the water, the gentle massage of your own hands. You tried to ground yourself in the present moment, to push away the intrusive thoughts, but they were relentless, like persistent whispers in the back of your mind.
You remembered the way he would hold your hand, the gentle squeeze that always made you feel safe and loved. Now, the memory felt tainted, a reminder of the trust that had been irrevocably shattered.
The sound of the water, once a soothing rhythm, now seemed to amplify the silence within your own thoughts. The absence of his voice, his touch, his presence, was a gaping void, a stark reminder of what you had lost.
You thought about the future, the road ahead. It stretched before you, uncertain and unknown. The thought of navigating this new chapter alone was daunting, but also strangely liberating. You were free, finally free from the weight of his lies, his manipulations, his betrayals.
You imagined a life without him, a life filled with new experiences, new connections, new possibilities. The thought was both exhilarating and terrifying. You were stepping into the unknown, leaving behind the familiar comfort of a relationship that had ultimately become a source of pain.
You rinsed the remaining soap from your skin, the water now a cool, refreshing stream. You stepped out of the shower, the cool air a sharp contrast to the warmth of the water. You reached for a plush, white towel, wrapping it around your body, the soft fabric a comforting embrace.
As you dried your hair, you looked at your reflection in the mirror. The face staring back at you was slightly different, slightly stronger, slightly more resilient. 
What if I never move past this hurt? is the question that always haunted you. 
The pain was still there, etched in the lines around your eyes, but there was also a newfound sense of determination, a quiet strength that you hadn't seen before.
You were going to be okay. You were going to heal. You were going to move on from this hurt. And you were going to do it on your own terms. 
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After a long, hot shower that felt like therapy, you changed into more comfortable clothes . The soft cotton felt good against your skin, a welcome contrast to the tense, coiled feeling you'd carried since the flight. You stared at your reflection, a flicker of something like resolve in your eyes. "Alright, venue time," you announced, emerging from the bathroom, the lingering scent of lemongrass trailing behind you. "Let's see what they've got going on."
"Finally," Jane groaned, stretching her arms above her head like a cat, her spine audibly cracking. "I was starting to think you'd fallen asleep in there.” She gave you a playful smirk. "Seriously, I was about to send in a search party."
You chuckled, a small, genuine sound. "Sorry, lost track of time. Needed a… reset. Besides the temperature is perfect, " 
“Also you might wanna check your phone,” Jane smirked and went inside the bathroom, leaving you confused. She couldn’t possibly know about Mingyu’s text. His contact was deep buried in your archives list.
You unlock your phone only to see a notification from Jay – the guy you went on two dates, 3 months after your breakup with Mingyu. You opened Jay’s text and you weren’t surprised to see what he had sent.
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Yeah, no. 
Your first failed situationship or talking stage. Whatever it is called.
You immediately replied to him.
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Yeah it was wild. Even for him.
On the first date itself you had understood, he was here for one thing. Not that you minded, but at that moment you weren’t ready for it. 
Even after ending that weird thing you had with him, he still behaved unhinged sometimes. Nothing you couldn't handle.
His selfie did get you out of your thoughts from Mingyu and onto some another thought – at the end of the day, you were an honest woman.
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Once the three of you were ready, the taxi ride to the venue was a blur of New York sights and sounds. The city was a sensory overload, a vibrant tapestry of honking horns, chattering voices, and the tantalizing aroma of street food. "Whoa, this place is huge," Jane commented, her eyes wide as you stepped into the converted ground space. "They're really going all out."
The venue was indeed a whirlwind of activity. Stagehands were scrambling up scaffolding, adjusting lights that cast dramatic shadows across the space. Sound technicians were huddled over consoles, their brows furrowed in concentration. And a local band was running through a soundcheck, their music a mix of gritty rock and soulful blues, filling the stress filled space.
"They better be," you said, scanning the half-assembled bar, noting the unfinished details, the unpolished surfaces. "We've got a lot riding on this." The pressure was a familiar weight, but today, it felt heavier, amplified by the lingering anxiety.
"Relax, boss lady," Jimin said, appearing at your side, his usual cheerful demeanor a welcome contrast to your focused intensity. "Everything's going to be fine."
"Just tell us what to do." He added and smiled.
You softened slightly, the tension in your shoulders easing a fraction. "Just… keep an eye on things," you said, gesturing towards the bar area. "Make sure they're following the layout, that the glassware is being handled carefully. And try not to break anything."
"Got it," Jimin grinned, his eyes twinkling. "Consider me your personal bar manager."
"Looks like they're making progress," you said, surveying the half-assembled bar, noting the placement of the back bar, the ice machines, and the overall flow of the space. "But we still have a lot to do. Tomorrow's 10 a.m. deadline is on our head, and the gates open at 12:30 p.m. No margin for error." 
You met with Dominic and Sarah, the customer marketing managers, both being the whirlwind of energy and efficiency. "Everything's on schedule," you assured them, your voice laced with a hint of controlled panic, their eyes darting between the various tasks being carried out around them. "But we're still waiting on the customised DJ glassware. Should be here by 8 a.m. tomorrow."
“___ we are not worried when you are on the project,” Dominic said while smiling. Thats on you bustling your ass and doing client servicing. You smiled.
You made mental notes, mentally ticking off items on your checklist. "We need to finalize the cocktail menu placement, ensure the ice machines are working, and double-check the placement of the floral arrangements," you said, your voice calm and authoritative, projecting an air of confidence you didn't entirely feel. You also checked the placement of the ice, the back bar, and the overall flow of the staff.  "The flow is very important,____. We cannot have a choke point at the bar. We need to keep things moving" Sarah explained, pointing to a potential bottleneck near the main entrance.
You nodded your head and already aligning your team for this hiccup to not take place.
Once Jimin had overlooked the production and Jane had instructed the bar team, the three of you left the venue.
"Dinner?" Jimin suggested, his stomach audibly rumbling, a low, guttural growl that echoed in the quiet street. "I'm starving and I will be back to check on the production,”
 "Dinner time," Jane declared, her stomach growling audibly. "I'm starving too. And I need a real drink, not just whatever's in that mini bar."
The Italian trattoria was warm and inviting, the air thick with the aroma of garlic, oregano, and simmering tomato sauce. "This place smells amazing," You said, inhaling deeply. "I'm going to order everything on the menu." 
The two of them laughed. At this point everyone in office knew your love for italian food. They thought you were joking. Oh.
The dinner was filled with laughter and stories, a welcome distraction from the day's pressures and travel. "Remember that time we went to that karaoke bar in Seoul?" Jimin asked, his eyes twinkling with mischief. "And you tried to sing 'As Long As You Love Me' by Bieber?"
"Oh god, don't remind me," Jane groaned, burying her face in her hands. "That was a disaster. A beautiful, ear-splitting disaster."
"It was a masterpiece," Jimin insisted, laughing. "A glorious, beautiful disaster. The audience was mesmerized."
“Yeah I couldn’t hear that song normally for months. Still can’t,” You were laughing along with them, the sound genuine and light, when you noticed the man at the table next to you. He looked familiar, but you couldn't quite place him. "Who's that?" you asked, nudging Jane, your voice lowered.
"Who?" she asked, following your gaze. "Oh, him. I don't know. Just some guy. Why?"
"He looks familiar," you said, frowning, tilting your head slightly. "I feel like I've seen him somewhere before. But I can't quite remember where."
"Maybe you have," Jimin said, shrugging, taking a bite of his pasta. "New York's a small world. Or maybe you're just imagining it. You've been working too hard."
You shrugged, dismissing the thought. But the feeling of familiarity lingered, a small, persistent itch in the back of your mind.
As you excused yourself to use the restroom, you bumped into someone in the narrow hallway. "Oh, sorry!" you blurted out, instinctively stepping back, a flicker of surprise in your eyes.
Your eyes met his doe eyes. He was handsome, with a warm, inviting smile that crinkled the corners of his eyes. "No problem," he said, his voice a low rumble, a hint of amusement in his tone. "We keep meeting this way."
"Excuse me?" you asked, confused, your brow furrowed. We do? you thought. Where have I seen him?
He just smiled, a hint of amusement in his eyes, as if he knew something you didn't. "Never mind," he said, his voice laced with a gentle teasing. "Have a good night."
"You too," you said, watching him walk away, your mind buzzing with questions. Who is he? And why does he seem so familiar? you thought. "That was weird," you muttered under your breath, a sense of unease mixing with a strange curiosity.
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Once you were back into your hotel room, it was already 12am. You immediately texted Jimin who after the dinner had gone back to the venue to check on the production. How was this man not tired?
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You heard Jane laugh next to you on the texts the 3 of you had just exchanged.
“Alright, goodnight Jane-y. We have to reach the venue by 7AM so Jimin can come back and rest and come back once the fest starts,” You said as you set your alarm.
Jane, sleepy, nodded and mumbled “Good night love,” and immediately dozed off.
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As much as you tried to sleep, you really couldn’t. You checked the time, and it was 1AM. You took your phone from the night stand and unlocked your phone. Maybe TikTok or Instagram reels might help.
Brainrot content – that's all you saw.
Mid laughing at a reel, your phone rang, the shrill tone cutting through the silence. Mingyu's name flashed across the screen, a stark reminder of the past that had been haunting your every step. You hesitated, your finger hovering over the answer button, a battle raging within you. Ignore it. Let it go. 
And so you didn’t pick up.
The phone rang again.
This time the need for closure, the need to finally confront the lingering pain, won out. You pressed the button, the sound of the connection a sharp, decisive click.
"Mingyu," you said, your voice trembling slightly, betraying the carefully constructed facade of composure. “I asked you not to-,”
You were cut off. "___," he began, his voice a low, urgent murmur, laced with a desperation that sent a shiver down your spine. "Please, just… please, listen to me. I need you to hear me out before you hang up."
You carefully removed the duvet and went inside the balcony, trying not to wake up Jane who was in a deep slumber.
"Hear you out?" you scoffed, a bitter laugh escaping your lips as you closed the balcony door behind you. "After everything? After you tore my world apart? You are funny, I’ll give you that,”
You heard him sigh on the other end.
"I know I hurt you, baby. I know I messed up. But… but I need you to understand. It wasn't just about… about the physical thing. It was about… feeling lost. Feeling like I wasn't enough." His voice cracked, and you could hear the raw emotion beneath the words.
"Don’t call me that,” You said. How could he? 
 “You lost that right the day you decided to cheat and not enough?" you repeated, incredulous. "I loved you, Mingyu. I supported you. I believed in you. And you tell me I wasn’t enough? Wow."
"It wasn't about you, ___. It was about me. My insecurities, my fears. I was trying to run away from myself, and I dragged you into it. I'm so sorry." His voice was thick with emotion, and for a moment, you almost believed him.
"So, you ran to her," you said, your voice laced with a mixture of anger and pain. "Someone who made you feel better about yourself. Someone who gave you the validation you thought I wasn't giving you."
"It wasn't like that," he insisted, his voice strained, pleading. "It was more… complicated. She… she understood a part of me that I felt like I couldn't share with anyone else."
"A part of you that you couldn't share with me?" you asked, your voice barely a whisper, the pain cutting through you like a knife. "The person who loved you unconditionally? The person who gave you her heart?"
"I know," he said, his voice heavy with regret. "I know I messed up. I messed up big time. And I don't expect you to forgive me. But I need you to know… I never stopped loving you, ___. Even when I was with her, it was you I thought about. You're the one I want."
"You have some nerve," you managed to say and a bitter laugh escaped your lips. "You want me now? After you've had your little… adventure? After you've broken my trust beyond repair?"
"I know I don't deserve it," he said, his voice cracking, the desperation evident. "But I'm begging you. Please, give me another chance. I'll do anything. I'll change. I'll be the man you deserve. I'll be better."
"You can't change who you are, Mingyu," you said, your voice trembling, tears welling up in your eyes. "And I can't go back to who I was. I can't go back to being someone who's constantly waiting for you to break my heart again. I can't live with that fear anymore."
Little did you know, Jane woke up. She watched you talk to Mingyu, proud of you finally letting it out. Finally standing up for yourself and letting out all your bottled up emotions.
"Please, ___, don't do this," he pleaded, his voice thick with emotion. "I need you. I love you. Please."
"No, Mingyu," you said, your voice firm, a newfound sense of strength resonating within you. "I need to let you go. I need to let myself go. I need to be free. I am finally free. You changed me. And I thank you for that."
"What?" he asked, his voice filled with confusion, a hint of panic creeping in.
"I am finally myself," you said, your voice clear, strong, a wave of liberation washing over you. "And I can't be myself with you. I can't be the person I am meant to be if I'm still clinging to the past."
"No, ___, don't," he pleaded, his voice desperate, a raw vulnerability exposed. "Please, don't say that. Don't do this to us. To me."
"Goodbye, Mingyu," you said, your voice steady, a sense of closure settling within you.
“Baby please," his voice breaking.
“Mingyu don't,” You said wiping your tears.
“Just don’t call or text me. Please,” 
He took several moments before he managed to mumble an ‘okay’
“Goodbye Mingyu,” You finally managed to say. 
“Goodbye ____. I’ll always love you,” He said that with what seemed like a genuine tone and with that you pressed the end call button, the click a sharp, final sound. You stared at your phone, the screen reflecting your tear-streaked face. You felt lighter, freer than you had in months. The shackles were gone, the weight lifted. You were finally, truly, free.
Tears streamed down your face, but they weren't tears of pain or anger. They were tears of release, of finally freeing yourself from the shackles of the past. You let yourself cry, the sobs wracking your body, each one a step further away from the pain.
As the tears subsided, you felt a gentle warmth envelop you. Jane was standing beside your bed, her eyes filled with concern and understanding. She didn't say a word, didn't ask any questions. She simply wrapped her arms around you, holding you close, offering silent comfort and unwavering support. You clung to her, the tears flowing freely, not from sadness, but from a profound sense of relief and liberation. You had finally broken free, and Jane was there to help you celebrate that newfound freedom.
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DAY 1 - NYC MIX FEST
The venue pulsed with a palpable energy, a stark contrast to the quiet, almost solemn, introspection of the previous night. By 12 PM, the Don Julio bar was a gleaming masterpiece of polished wood, shimmering glassware, and precisely arranged bottles of their stunning portfolio. The customized Mexican DJ-inspired, skull glassware, thankfully delivered right on schedule, caught the light, casting a dazzling array of reflections. You, Jane, and Jimin moved with practiced ease, fine-tuning the last details, ensuring every element was flawless. The air crackled with the sound of music, the clinking of glasses, and the excited murmur of early attendees.
"Looks like we actually pulled it off, huh?" Jane said, a sigh of genuine relief escaping her lips as she meticulously adjusted a row of cocktail garnishes. "I was starting to think those glasses were cursed."
"Don't even say that," Jimin retorted, his brow furrowed as he adjusted a floral arrangement with the precision of a surgeon. "We're not out of the woods yet. We still have the main rush to contend with." He paused, stepping back to admire his handiwork. "But yeah, it looks good. Real good."
You took a deep breath, the crisp scent of fresh lime and premium tequila filling your senses. This is it, you thought, a quiet sense of triumph washing over you. A new day, a new beginning. The lingering weight of Mingyu's call had completely dissipated, replaced by a feeling of lightness, a newfound sense of quiet confidence. "Let's take a quick walk around," you suggested, gesturing towards the bustling crowd. "See what the other brands are doing. Get a feel for the atmosphere."
The venue was a sprawling showcase of branded experiences, each competing for attention. Tanqueray's gin garden was a verdant oasis, complete with live botanical displays and bartenders crafting bespoke cocktails with fresh herbs. Johnnie Walker's whisky lounge exuded an air of sophisticated elegance, with plush leather seating, dim lighting, and a curated selection of rare blends. Toki's highball station was a minimalist masterpiece, showcasing the clean, crisp flavors of Japanese whisky with sleek, modern design and their concept Toki-o nights which was heavily inspired by music. And Glenmorangie’s setup was a vibrant, beach-themed extravaganza, with bright colors, tropical decorations, and a lively, party atmosphere.
"Wow, they've really gone all out," Jane commented, her eyes scanning the crowd with a mixture of admiration and professional curiosity. "The competition is fierce."
"Tell me about it," you agreed, noting the intricate details of each brand's activation. "But I think we've got the edge. Our bar is both stylish and functional. A perfect balance of aesthetic and practicality."
Jimin nodded enthusiastically. "And the cocktails are killer," he added, a mischievous grin spreading across his face. "I may have sampled a few myself, just to ensure quality control, of course."
“No wonder the bar team was giving me knowing looks,” You rolled your eyes playfully. "Of course," you said, chuckling. "Just don't get too carried away."
"Never," Jimin said, feigning innocence.
You all moved towards a photo booth where a long queue was forming, attendees eager to capture the moment. "Look at the line," you said, impressed. "That's a great sign. We’ll definitely come back later when it's less crowded. Perfect for some social media content."
Returning to the Don Julio bar, the music grew louder, more insistent. The band from the previous night was performing again, their sound filling the space with a raw, soulful energy. The stage was conveniently located right next to the Don Julio bar. Your eyes were drawn to the lead singer - it was the same dude from the Italian restaurant. He was completely immersed in the music, his voice a powerful, melodic rumble that resonated through the venue.
Musicians have always been your weakness.
He really is talented, you thought, watching him move across the stage with an effortless grace. And incredibly handsome. You couldn't help but notice the way his checkered shirt hugged his broad shoulders, the way his dark hair fell across his forehead, and the way his doe eyes, even from a distance, seemed to hold a spark of something intense.
He didn't seem to notice you, thankfully, his focus entirely on the performance. You quickly turned your attention back to the bar, trying to shake off the unexpected flutter in your chest. Focus, ___. you told yourself, mentally running through the checklist of tasks. You have a job to do.
But even as you worked, adjusting bottles, straightening napkins, your eyes kept drifting back to the stage. There was something about him, something familiar and intriguing, that you couldn't quite ignore. The feeling was a gentle hum beneath the surface of your thoughts, a quiet reminder of the unexpected encounters that had marked the beginning of your New York adventure.
Jane, noticing your gaze, exchanged a knowing look with Jimin. They both smirked, but thankfully, refrained from any overt teasing. They knew you were still processing a lot, and a playful jab might not be well-received. Instead, Jane subtly nudged you with her elbow, a silent acknowledgment of your obvious unspoken attraction.
"Everything alright, boss lady?" Jimin asked, his voice laced with a playful undertone, trying hard to keep his gaze fixed on the bar.
"Fine," you said, a little too quickly. "Just… admiring the music. I’m all about the music you know that,"
"Sure you are," Jane mumbled under her breath, a playful glint in her eyes to which Jimin couldn’t help but chuckle.
You rolled your eyes, but couldn't suppress a small smile. Maybe a little distraction wouldn't hurt, you thought, a flicker of something like excitement igniting within you. But first, work.
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By 4 PM, the venue had transformed into a pulsating hub of activity, a kaleidoscope of branded experiences and eager attendees. The clients, Dominic and Sarah, arrived, their eyes alight with a blend of professional scrutiny and genuine excitement. They'd been privy to the meticulously curated visuals you'd sent, but witnessing the Don Julio bar in its full glory was an entirely different experience.
"___, this is… exceptional," Dominic declared, his voice booming across the space, cutting through the ambient noise like a well-tuned bassline. "You've truly captured the essence of the brand."
"The lighting, the glassware, the sheer artistry of the cocktails," Sarah added, her eyes tracing the intricate details of the bar's design. "It's a masterpiece. You guys have outdone yourselves,"
You managed a smile, a mixture of relief and pride washing over you. "Thank you," you said, your voice steady despite the flutter of nerves in your stomach. "Jimin, Jane and I wanted to create an immersive experience, something that resonated with the spirit of Don Julio and what better than personalised Don Julio skull mugs,"
The next few hours were a blur of client interactions, strategic small talk, and the relentless monitoring of the bar's operation. You, despite your innate aversion to superficial conversations, navigated the social labyrinth with practiced ease. It was a necessary evil, a performance required for the success of the event.
"So, Sarah," you began, steering the conversation towards the broader festival experience, "what are your impressions of the other brand activations?"
"They're all… interesting," she replied, her tone carefully neutral. "But I am also a little biased,” You chuckled. “Don Julio has a certain… sophistication. It's not just about the spectacle; it's about the experience."
"Precisely," you said, nodding in agreement. "We wanted to create a space where attendees could truly appreciate the craftsmanship and heritage of the brand."
As the evening wore on, a subtle sense of disappointment began to creep in. Your eyes, despite your best efforts, kept drifting towards the stage, searching for a familiar figure. The musician, with his soulful voice and captivating presence, was conspicuously absent. Maybe he's performing with his band tomorrow, you thought, trying to quell the rising tide of disappointment. It's a two-day festival, after all.
By 7 PM, the disappointment had solidified into a quiet ache, a subtle undercurrent beneath the surface of your professional composure. You continued to circulate, engaging with clients, ensuring their glasses were filled and their questions answered, but the absence of the musician cast a shadow over the evening.
The first day of the Mix Fest drew to a close at 10 PM, the venue slowly emptying as attendees filtered out, their voices echoing through the cavernous space. Exhausted but undeniably satisfied, you, Jane, and Jimin made your way back to The Ludlow.
"I'm going to hit the spa," you announced, a wave of weariness washing over you. "Anyone care to join me?"
"I'm beat brother," Jane said, stretching her arms above her head, her spine cracking audibly. "I'm going straight to bed. I'll see you tomorrow."
"Same here," Jimin agreed, stifling a yawn. "But have a good one!"
The spa was a sanctuary of tranquility, a haven of warmth and soothing aromas. The humid air enveloped you like a comforting embrace, easing the tension in your muscles. You closed your eyes, letting the gentle heat work its magic, the day's stresses melting away.
After a long session in the steam room, you emerged, your skin glowing, your mind clear. You wandered towards the relaxation area, a dimly lit space with plush loungers and soft, ambient music. And that's when you saw him. Soobin.
He was sprawled across one of the loungers, his eyes closed, his face relaxed. He looked good, you had to admit, the dim light casting his features in a flattering glow.
"Soobin?" you said, your voice a soft whisper, a mix of surprise and mild amusement.
His eyes fluttered open, a slow, slightly disoriented smile spreading across his face. "___? What a… surprise."
"Surprise?" you echoed, raising an eyebrow, a hint of playful skepticism in your voice. "You're here for the festival?"
"Yeah," he said, sitting up, his movements a little stiff. " I am visiting few friends here so we decided to check the fest. I'm a big fan of the… music scene here. And the… atmosphere." He said the last word with a strange emphasis.
You chuckled, a dry, almost cynical sound. "Of course," you said, your eyes narrowing slightly.
Soobin was your second "situationship," or a failed talking stage if you wanted to call it that. A brief but intense connection that had almost blossomed into something more. You'd been genuinely drawn to him, intrigued by his quiet intensity and his thoughtful demeanor. But he was always a little… hesitant, a little unsure. And you, still reeling from the aftermath of your relationship with Mingyu, were equally reluctant to fully commit.
An awkward silence descended, thick and heavy, punctuated only by the soft murmur of the spa's ambient music. Soobin shifted uncomfortably, his gaze darting around the room, avoiding your eyes.
"So," he began, his voice strained, "how have you been?"
"Good," you replied, keeping your tone casual, your expression carefully neutral. "Busy with work, as always."
"Right. ___ the boss lady" he said, nodding slowly, his eyes still avoiding yours. "The festival… it's quite something, isn't it?"
"It is," you agreed, your voice flat.
Another awkward silence stretched between you, the tension in the air thick enough to cut with a knife. You could feel his gaze lingering on you, a mixture of curiosity and something else, something you couldn't quite decipher.
"You look… good," he said, his voice barely above a whisper, his gaze finally meeting yours.
"Thanks," you said, a flicker of something like irritation flashing through you. "You too."
He was still attractive, you had to admit, but the spark that had once flickered between you had dimmed, replaced by a sense of awkwardness and unspoken regrets.
"It's been a while," he said, his voice laced with a hint of nostalgia.
"It has," you agreed, your voice cool.
God this was painfully awkward. If only Jane and Jimin were here with you now. They would have saved you from whatever this was but also would have a blast making fun of this situation.
"We should… catch up sometime," he suggested, his voice hesitant, his eyes searching for your agreement.
"Maybe," you said, noncommittally, your gaze drifting towards the exit.
The silence that followed was heavy with unspoken words, a lingering sense of what could have been. You felt a wave of weariness wash over you, the day's events finally catching up. You wanted to escape, to retreat to the solitude of your room, to process the unexpected encounter.
"Well," you said, rising to your feet, "I should probably get going. It's been a long day."
"Right," he said, nodding slowly, his expression a mixture of disappointment and resignation. "Yeah, of course."
You turned to leave, a sense of relief washing over you. The encounter had been awkward, uncomfortable, a reminder of a chapter you'd thought you'd closed. As you walked away, you couldn't help but wonder if this was a sign, a second chance. Or just another unexpected, slightly uncomfortable, encounter in the whirlwind of your New York adventure. You decided, at that moment, that you were going to go to sleep and not think about it any more.
Life has genuinely been weird since last two days.
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DAY 2 - NYC MIX FEST
The aftershocks of the past two days lingered, a subtle tremor in the usually steady rhythm of your life. Sleep, a fickle companion, had been a patchwork of disjointed dreams and the persistent echo of Mingyu's voice. Then the encounter with Soobin in the spa, though brief, had left a faint, unpleasant aftertaste, a reminder of unfinished chapters.
Waking up late, you felt a strange sense of detachment, a subtle disconnect from the day's impending chaos. A glance at your phone revealed the time – 12:00 PM. Damn, you thought, a wave of mild panic washing over you. You were never late. You were always meticulously punctual. 
New York definitely has had its effect on you.
Rushing through your morning routine, you arrived at the venue at 12:45 PM, a minute that felt like an eternity. Jane and Jimin were already deep in conversation near the Don Julio bar, their laughter echoing through the near-empty space.
“Jane! You didn’t wake me up,” You said in anger, although it wasn’t serious. Day 2 of the fest was supposed to be chill so you weren’t that worried.
It’s just bad habits that die hard.
“Hey!!” Jane exclaimed. “I was letting you rest, knowing you work like a machine,” She said feigning innocence. Now who could say no to that face?
You just playfully rolled your eyes at her and she chuckled.
"Well, well, look who decided to grace us with their presence," Jimin teased, a playful glint in his eyes. "Did you finally decide to sleep in?"
"Sorry," you mumbled, a blush creeping up your neck. "I overslept. I had a rough night."
"It's fine," Jane said, waving a dismissive hand. "We were just about to grab some lunch. Come on, you can catch up on the gossip."
Over a quick lunch of festival fare, the three of you discussed the previous day's events, the client feedback, and the general buzz of the festival. You kept your encounter with Soobin to yourself, not wanting to rehash the awkwardness but knowing sooner or later, you were gonna spill it for them. You just had to make sure that you would be staying away from the hotel spa.
"So," Jane said, her eyes twinkling with mischief, "did you manage to spot your mystery musician?"
You shook your head, a flicker of disappointment crossing your face. "No, not yet. I'm starting to think he's a figment of my imagination."
"Maybe he's saving his grand entrance for today," Jimin suggested, winking. "You know, building suspense."
After lunch, you decided to take a walk around the venue, hoping to clear your head and shake off the lingering sense of unease. You were still feeling slightly off-kilter, a little out of sync with your usual self. 
Just thinking about the last two days. They had been wild and went so fast. You had finally broken away from the shackles of your relationship with Mingyu, felt yourself returning, the Jay and Soobin interaction. So much had happened.
You still felt alone. 
Looking around the fest, you saw couples around you mingling with each other and just having fun and living life and you felt a bittersweet feeling. When was it gonna be my turn? is the only thought that crossed your mind.
You were successful in your career, decent looking yet love was the only part of your life that wasn’t figured out. Actually you had it figured out for a long time when you were Mingyu, almost even thought you would marry him – Yeah no, not that thought.
As you rounded a corner near the main stage, you bumped into someone, sending a set of drumsticks clattering to the ground.
"Oh, I'm so sorry!" you blurted out, instinctively bending down to help pick them up.
Was it the musician?
Looking up, you realized it wasn't the musician, but another member of his band. He was tall, with a warm, friendly smile and a pair of intelligent eyes. You felt a wave of disappointment, quickly suppressed.
"No, it's okay," he said, his voice deep and melodic. "Don't worry about it. It was my fault."
"I seem to be bumping into everyone lately," you said, a wry smile playing on your lips. "It's becoming a bit of a theme."
He chuckled, a warm, genuine sound. "It's a busy place. Easy to get turned around."
You noticed the drumsticks in his hand. "Are you performing here?" you asked, gesturing towards the main stage.
"Yeah," he replied, a hint of excitement in his voice. "We're called Sunrise Boulevard."
"Oh, cool," you said, a genuine smile spreading across your face. "I'll have to check you out. What time is your set?"
"Please do," he said, handing you the drumsticks. "Let me know what you think. We play at 7PM! This is our first big gig,” He said with excitement. It was infectious.
"I will," you promised.
"I'm Namjoon," he said, extending his hand.
"___," you replied, shaking his hand.
You introduced yourself, and he told you a little about the band, their music, and their journey. You explained your role in the Don Julio activation. You found yourself enjoying the conversation, his easygoing charm a welcome distraction from your earlier anxieties.
“Drinks on me, okay,” You laughed and told me.
“I’ll hold you to that,” He smirked.
Jane, who had been watching from a distance, approached, her eyes sparkling with interest. "Who's this?" she asked, her voice laced with playful curiosity.
"This is Namjoon," you said, introducing them. "He's the drummer for Sunrise Boulevard."
"Nice to meet you," Jane said, extending her hand, her smile widening.
"You too," Namjoon replied, his smile equally bright.
Jane seemed particularly interested in Namjoon, her questions flowing easily, her laughter light and genuine. You watched them interact, a sense of amusement mixing with a quiet sense of relief. 
Both Jimin and you saw her tuck her hair while talking to him and smirked. Classic tell-a-tale sign when Jane is interested in someone.
At least someone was having a good time.
After a few minutes, Jane and Namjoon exchanged numbers, and he headed towards the stage for soundcheck. Jane returned to the Don Julio bar, a satisfied grin on her face.
"So," Jimin said, raising an eyebrow, "who was that?"
"That was Namjoon," Jane replied, her cheeks flushed. "He's the drummer for Sunrise Boulevard. They're playing today."
"And?" you asked, a playful smirk on your face.
"And," Jane said, rolling her eyes, "they're a rookie band. This is their first big festival. They're really good, though. You should check them out."
"A rookie band, huh?" Jimin said, his eyes twinkling. "Sounds interesting."
"They are," Jane insisted. "And he's really nice."
"Someone's got a crush," you teased, nudging Jane's arm.
"Shut up," she said, blushing. "I just think they deserve some support."
"Of course you do," Jimin said, chuckling. "We'll definitely check them out."
You made sure to stay away from the hotel spa and any areas where you might run into Soobin. You had no desire to relive that awkward encounter. You were here to work, to enjoy the festival, and to finally see Sunrise Boulevard perform. You decided to make sure to keep an eye out for Namjoon and his band’s set.
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With the overwhelming amount of crowd at the Don Julio bar, you didn’t even realise that it was almost 7PM. 
Once the clock struck 7PM, you could see the majority of the crowd gathering near the stage. And they thought they were rookie. You helped the bartending team while bringing in some ingredients for the cocktails when you heard the most angelic possible voice.
“Oh my god, the lead singer is so handsome,” You heard a few girls fangirl (?) and you glanced towards the stage, curious to see what all the fuss was about, and to see if the band was really as good as Jane had said.
The stage lights dimmed, casting long, dramatic shadows across the eager crowd. A hush fell over the venue as the band members took their positions. Then, a voice, smooth and confident, cut through the silence.
"Hey everyone, I'm JK, lead singer of Sunrise Boulevard, and this is our band!" He gestured towards his bandmates. "On guitar, Taehyung! On drums, Namjoon! On bass, Hoseok! And on keyboard, Yoongi!" The rest of them waved towards the crowd which got them screaming.
The crowd erupted in applause as they launched into their first song, a sultry, rock-infused rendition of Chase Atlantic's "Swim." JK’s voice, laced with a hint of smoky allure, filled the space, captivating the audience. The band's energy was palpable, their performance a blend of raw intensity and polished precision.
After the Chase Atlantic cover, they transitioned into their original songs. The first, "City Lights," was a driving pop-rock anthem with a catchy chorus, reminiscent of early 2000s alternative rock. The second, "Lost in the Echoes," had a more introspective feel, with JK’s vocals soaring over a melancholic melody, showcasing his impressive range. For a third song, they played "Crimson Sky," a high-energy rock song with a powerful guitar riff, getting the crowd to jump and sing along.
As the set progressed, you found yourself drawn into their performance, despite your professional focus. JK’s stage presence was undeniable, his charisma radiating from the stage. The kind of presence that demanded attention. You noticed his eyes scanning the crowd, and for a fleeting moment, you thought they lingered on you. You quickly looked away, a blush creeping up your neck, trying to focus on the busy bar.
Yeah no, not the time to be delusional.
As the band finished their third song, JK stepped forward, a slight smile playing on his lips. "We have one more song for you tonight," he announced, his voice soft, yet carrying through the venue. "It's a little different from our usual style. I wrote it recently, and it's called 'Still With You.'"
The crowd cheered as the band launched into the song. It was a slower, more soulful ballad, JK’s voice filled with raw emotion. The song's lyrics, a heartfelt expression of longing and vulnerability, resonated with the audience, creating a quiet, intimate atmosphere. You found yourself captivated by his performance, his voice weaving a spell around you, cutting through the noise of the festival.
As the set ended, JK's eyes swept across the crowd once more. This time, you were sure they lingered on you. He held your gaze for a moment, a subtle intensity in his eyes, then looked away, a slight smile playing on his lips. You tried to dismiss it as a coincidence, but a flutter of excitement stirred within you.
Lord, New York was something else.
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The band exited the stage, and you returned to the Don Julio bar, helping the team with the rush of customers. A few minutes later, Namjoon approached, JK trailing slightly behind him, hands in his pockets.
Namjoon hopped onto an empty stool, a slightly sheepish grin on his face. "Hey," he said, running a hand through his hair. "So, uh, how'd we do?"
You chuckled, wiping down the counter. "You guys were great. Seriously. The crowd loved you."
"Yeah?" Namjoon asked, a hint of relief in his voice. "We were kinda nervous. First big festival and all."
"You wouldn't have known it," you assured him. "You guys looked completely at home up there."
"That's good to hear," he said, nodding. "We put a lot of work into this set. Especially JK, he was stressing about the Chase Atlantic cover."
"It was a bold choice," you said, glancing at JK, who was leaning against the bar, observing the crowd. "But it worked. It really set the tone."
"He's always pushing  to try new things," Namjoon said, rolling his eyes playfully. "Sometimes it drives us crazy, but I guess it pays off."
"It definitely did tonight," you said, smiling. "Especially that last song, 'Still With You'. It was beautiful."
JK finally spoke, his voice low and smooth. "Thank you," he said, meeting your gaze. "It means a lot."
"No, really," you said, turning back to Namjoon. "You guys have a really unique sound. It's not just another pop-rock band."
"That's what we're going for," Namjoon said, nodding. "We want to stand out."
"You definitely do," you said, grabbing a bottle of tequila. "So, what can I get you guys? Drinks are on me, remember?" 
"Oh, right!" Namjoon said, snapping his fingers. "I almost forgot. I'll take a... what are you having?"
“Oh,” You chuckled. “I don’t drink and besides I’m at work so,” You managed to say which earned you a look from JK.
“So what will you guys have? Want me to suggest?” You diverted the topic.
“Yes please,” Namjoon smiled. You looked over the menu and suggested ‘Don Paloma’ and ‘Don Picante’ to the two of them. 
“Wow you know your cocktails,” JK said while having that look. The look that made you nervous.
“I wouldn’t be doing a good job at work if I didn’t,” You chuckled.
As you placed the order to the bar team, you noticed Jane and Jimin coming your way. You immediately saw Namjoon smile at that.
Yeah you and Jimin have to clock that.
The conversation then continued to flow easily, but you couldn't shake the feeling that JK was watching you, his gaze lingering, but in a way that felt more curious than intrusive. You felt a strange mix of excitement and nervousness, unsure of what to make of his attention, but the conversation with the rest of them felt like a welcome buffer.
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Namjoon grinned, a mischievous glint in his eyes. "You know what? We're running low on drinks for the band. Let's grab another round."
"Good idea," Jane chimed in, nodding towards the bar. "We wouldn't want anyone getting thirsty."
You watched them go, a knowing smile playing on your lips. Smooth. But hey, who were you to judge?
Jimin, who had been uncharacteristically quiet, suddenly stood. "Uh, I need to… check on some, uh, thing," he mumbled, avoiding eye contact. "See you guys later."
Yeah you were cursing him in your mind.
He practically bolted, leaving you and JK alone. "Well," you said, turning to JK, "that was… awkward.”
He chuckled, a playful glint in his eyes. "He's probably checking on the drinks too, you know, to make sure they're… properly distributed,”
He paused, then gestured towards the festival grounds. "Want to go for a walk? Check out the place? See if we can find anything?” 
“You sure? Aren’t you tired?” You asked him genuinely. After that performance anyone would be tired.
"Yes I’m sure,"  he smiled.
As you walked, JK pointed towards the brightly lit Ferris wheel. "Ferris wheel," he said, a hint of amusement in his voice. "A classic." 
"Isn't that a little… cliché?" you asked, raising an eyebrow. "Like, straight out of a rom-com?"
"Sometimes cliché is good," he replied, a playful smirk tugging at the corner of his lips. "Besides, it's a great view. And who knows, maybe we’ll have a rom-com moment of our own."
You raised your eyebrow and chuckled.
“Yeah sorry that was bad,” He shook his head and laughed.
“Oh wait, I didn't introduce myself. I’m Jungkook,” He put his hand forward for a handshake. “And I’m ___”, You smiled as you shook hands with him.
As you walked ahead, Jungkook's eyes widened. "Wait a minute," he said, snapping his fingers. "You're the girl from the airport!"
"What? What airport?" you asked, feigning confusion, though a flicker of recognition sparked in your mind.
"Yeah, you were… a bit overwhelmed," he said, his eyes twinkling. "And you're also the girl from the Italian place."
"Yeah, that I am," you replied, a smile spreading across your face. "Small world, huh?" He remembers. And he remembers the details. That’s… unexpected.
Yeah no, you weren’t going to delude yourself.
As you rode the Ferris wheel, the city lights spread out below you, a dazzling panorama. "It's beautiful," you murmured, gazing at the view. "I've never been to New York before."
"Really?" Jungkook asked, his eyes widening slightly. "First time?"
"Yeah," you said, a hint of wonder in your voice. "It's… overwhelming, in a good way."
He nodded.
You talked about your dreams, your work, your passions. He listened intently, his eyes never leaving yours. He’s a good listener. Not something you find every day. Or ever.
“So where have you been till now?” He asked as the two of you exited the ferris wheel. “Uh, honestly? Nowhere,” You shrugged. “We came on Friday and have been working since then. We still have tomorrow to explore,” You smiled and told him.
“Any places you could suggest though?” You asked as you thanked the person managing the ferris wheel not noticing the smug grin on Jungkook’s face for what he was about to say next.
"Well," he said, his voice a low murmur, "I can show you around. Show you the real New York. The places the tourists don't know about."
He’s smooth. You will have to give him that.
“You can?” You raised your eyebrows to which he nodded.
He’s definitely flirting. And you are definitely not complaining.
Since the ferris wheel ride ended, and you stepped back onto solid ground, the city lights beginning to fade into the background as you re-entered the heart of the festival. That was… nice, you thought, a small smile playing on your lips. As you continued your walk, the conversation flowed easily, naturally transitioning to the various brand activations scattered throughout the grounds. You pointed out a particularly eye-catching display, discussing its marketing strategies and potential impact. 
"Wow," Jungkook said, genuinely impressed. "How do you know so much?"
"It'd be funny if I didn't," you replied, a wry smile playing on your lips. "These are my clients. And potential clients. It's kind of my job to know."
He seems to be impressed.
As you walked, you began to get to know each other. "So, you're from Seoul, right?" Jungkook asked, his eyes curious.
"Yeah, born and raised," you replied, a hint of nostalgia in your voice. "Been working with Black Media Marketing for two years now. We handle a lot of brand activations, events, that kind of thing."
"That's impressive," Jungkook said, nodding. "It must be exciting working with so many different brands."
"It is," you agreed, a smile playing on your lips. "It's always something new."
"And you?" you asked. "You're from Busan, right?"
"Yeah, that's home," he said, a soft smile spreading across his face. "The band was created there," he continued proudly.
"You guys were amazing tonight," you said, genuinely impressed by the crowd's reaction. "The crowd was wild."
"Thanks," he said, a hint of pride in his voice, but also a touch of modesty. "It was a good crowd. We're still getting used to this kind of response."
"Getting used to it?" you asked, raising an eyebrow. "You guys were like… rock stars."
He chuckled. "We're just a few guys who love making music. It's great to see people enjoying it."
You spotted a photo booth, a long line snaking its way towards it. "Damn," you said, a hint of disappointment in your voice. "I wanted to go there. Couldn't even get in yesterday."
Jungkook simply looked at you, a thoughtful expression on his face. He’s quiet. Too quiet. What’s he thinking?
As you walked, you spotted Soobin in the distance, talking to a group of people. You both made eye contact for a brief moment, then quickly looked away. Awkward. Just… awkward.
"I'm actually here only for a day more," you said, breaking the silence, the thought of your limited time in the city suddenly feeling more pressing.
"Oh," he replied, a playful smirk tugging at the corner of his lips, "we've got to make the most of it then."
You were taken aback a little. Not that you minded it.
"So," he asked, his voice low, "I'll see you tomorrow?" You paused, a playful smile playing on your lips. He’s asking you out. And  you can’t help but want to say yes. "Yes," you replied, your voice barely a whisper. "I'd like that."
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The next morning you smiled as you woke up. It had been a while you woke up like that.
You immediately took your phone from the nightstand and saw a text from him.
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Now when did he save his name as that? Oh yeah when he dropped you off at the hotel last night and you exchanged numbers.
Jane was not in the room when you came back from whatever it is that you and Jungkook had going on last night.
You turned around to see Jane fast asleep on her bed. 
Guess you weren’t the only one who had a great time last night.
You didn’t want to enter into something too fast. Hell, you had finally found your way out from the shackles of Mingyu and even Soobin for that matter. You definitely didn’t want to ruin things - if there was even anything, with Jungkook.
You were just gonna see how things go. Yeah.
Getting out of your thoughts, you replied back to Jungkook.
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Yeah definitely shouldn’t have said that.
This all you saw for the next two minutes which felt like hours.
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Great, just great. 
What felt like eternity, you heard your phone ting with a notification of a new message.
You immediately opened his chat, hoping to see you haven’t embarrassed yourself yet. Lord, please.
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Well thank god for that.
With a big smile on your face, you take out your comfiest pair of jeans, crop top and a leather jacket and go for your shower.
Today was going to be good. You had a feeling.
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As you exited the elevator, you saw Jungkook waiting in the lobby, leaning against a marble pillar, dressed casually in a faded denim jacket, dark jeans, and sneakers. His hair, slightly tousled, caught the morning light. He looked effortlessly cool. He smiled as he saw you, a warm, genuine smile that crinkled the corners of his eyes. "Ready for what could possibly be the best day of your life?"
"Is it? The stakes seem high,”  you smirked and said, slipping your hand into his. His hand was warm, his grip firm but gentle. His touch, a familiar warmth, a promise of adventure.
He led you out onto the busy street, the air thick with the smell of exhaust fumes and hot pretzels. The sounds of the city surrounded you—the honking of taxis, the rumble of buses, the chatter of pedestrians. "Central Park first," he said, nodding towards the green expanse.
The park was a welcome break from the city's intensity. Sunlight filtered through the leaves of towering oak trees, dappling the paths with patches of light and shadow. You walked, the sounds of the city fading into a background hum, replaced by the chirping of birds and the rustling of leaves. He pointed out quiet spots, little details you wouldn’t have noticed on your own—a hidden fountain, a secluded bench, a patch of wildflowers.
"I used to come here a lot," he said, stopping by a small pond where ducks paddled lazily. "When I needed to… get away. Just to think."
“I have a similar place. In Seoul,” You reminisce and share with him.
You then stopped at a hot dog stand, the aroma of grilled onions and mustard filling the air. "Hungry?" he asked, grinning.
"Starving," you admitted, your stomach audibly rumbling.
You got two hot dogs, laughing as you struggled with the mustard and sauerkraut, the tangy smell making your mouth water. "This is a mess," you said, wiping your hands with a napkin.
He chuckled, gently wiping a smudge of mustard from your cheek with his thumb. "Yeah, but it's good." His touch was light, but it sent a little shiver down your spine, a warmth spreading through your chest. His eyes held yours, and for a moment, the bustling city faded away.
“So when do you come back to Seoul?” You ask, curious. 
“Just one more show in NYC, and we are back,” He smiles and tells you.
He then takes you to a  speakeasy tucked behind an unassuming bookstore, where they sip on cocktails under dim, moody lighting. A rooftop that offers an exclusive view of the skyline, one he swears is better than any observation deck. 
And then a  tiny, family-run vinyl shop where you flip through records together, fingers brushing occasionally as the two of you reach for the same one.
That’s when the conversation shifts.
The two of you talk about your mutual love for music. How it’s always been more than just sound for you—how it’s an experience, an emotion, a story in itself. 
“Ever since I was a kid, I used to collect CDs or cassettes of any new album that came out. If it was new, I just had to have it,” You chuckled and reminisced. 
However you did notice an expression on Jungkook’s face. That made you feel something that you haven’t felt in a while.
You also tell him about the concerts you have attended, the ones you have worked on, how you are drawn to the artistry of it all.  He listens intently, eyes never leaving yours. 
Then, he shares his own journey—his struggles, his passion, the moments that made him fall in love with music all over again.
“You know, when I started out, I had no idea what I was doing,” he admits with a small chuckle, leaning back against the vinyl shelves. “I mean, I loved music, but I didn’t think I’d ever actually make something people would listen to.”
You tilt your head, intrigued. “So what changed?”
He exhales, glancing down at a record in his hands. “I met people who believed in me more than I did. And eventually, I had to start believing too.” He looks up at you then, a quiet intensity in his gaze. “It wasn’t easy, though. I’ve had moments where I wanted to quit, where I thought maybe I wasn’t good enough. But every time I step on stage, every time I write something that actually means something to me… it reminds me why I started.”
You watch him, the way his fingers tap lightly against the record’s cover, the way his voice carries that underlying passion. “That’s incredible,” you murmur. “I think that’s why I love music so much. It’s raw. It’s real. And it connects people in ways nothing else can.”
A small smile plays on his lips. “Exactly.”
There’s an understanding between the two of you, something unspoken yet deeply felt.
Before the night ends, he tugs you toward a small photo booth tucked away in a side street.
“Come on, let’s make it official. Proof that I was the best New York tour guide,” he jokes, but there’s a softness in his gaze.
Inside, the space is small, forcing you both closer than before. The first picture is casual, both of you grinning. The second, a silly face-off. The third? A little more still. You are both just… looking at each other, lips parted slightly, something lingering in the air between them. And the fourth—well, he doesn’t hesitate to throw an arm around you, pulling you just a tad bit closer.
When the strip of photos prints out, you take one, he keeps the other. Neither of you say much about the moment, but you both know something has shifted.
The city starts to feel quieter as he walks you back to your hotel. You both stop just outside the entrance of your hotel, the hum of the streets still buzzing around them. He shifts on his feet before finally speaking up.
“I had a good time today,” You smile. You meant it.
“Me too. Had the best time,” Jungkook looks in your eyes. The kind of look that says he doesn’t want to let go. You knew that because you were feeling the same way.
And then,
“___” He calls out your name and you look at him.
He seems nervous when he says this. “Can I take you out for real? Once we’re in Seoul?” His voice holds a mix of hesitation and confidence, as if he already knows the answer but still wants to hear it from you.
Is this really happening?
Then, after a beat, he adds, “I know this is fast, but I just… I don’t know, I want to explore whatever this is.”
You don't reply immediately, just look at him, your heart pounding against your ribs. Then, with a shy nod, you managed to say, “Yeah. Me too,”
A slow smile spreads across his face.
He looks even more endearing with this genuine smile of his.
Guess you both were the kind of people who wanted to take risks and not have regrets later.
He leans in, pressing a soft peck against your cheek before pulling back.
“Goodnight.”
And just like that, he walks away, leaving you standing there with your fingers grazing the spot where his lips had been, your heart still racing, your mind already replaying the night over and over again.
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A week later, you wake up with a text. The kind of text that makes you gushy like a teenager.
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And before you could respond to him, you received another text. a series of texts rather.
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While the two of them continued to bicker, you had to reply back to him.
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Maybe love really doesn’t disappear. Maybe it just reverbs—waiting for the right moment to be heard again.
And maybe it was finally your time.
© foreignjaykay, 2025.
262 notes · View notes
zarla-s · 2 years ago
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[previous]
This isn’t saying you shouldn’t write bad or sad stories or anything, but from Gaster’s perspective as a character in those stories of course he’d want “happy” endings, haha.
But anyway, I kept telling you guys that when Handplates was over I would tell you. Well... here we are. After seven long years, here we are.
When I started I never thought I’d make it. To be honest, it doesn’t feel real to me at all. My brain still expects to do another page in about two weeks as it always does. I assume it’ll take a while to sink in. There’s a lot to say but this post is already incredibly long (sorry), so it’s probably suited to its own post.
But for all of you out there who read this story, whether you were there from the beginning or just came in now, thank you so much. And for all of you that were inspired by this comic, who created things for it, who blessed me with so many amazing gifts of art and fic and music and dubs and videos and so much more... I don’t know how to thank you enough. I never dreamed that an idle idea could have come this far or had such an impact on my life and so many people, but it did.
I kind of feel at a loss for words... again it’s very surreal. But I will say that Gaster wondering whether the kid is an actual human or not has an unintended level to it since my avatar is a fox but it’s TOO LATE NOW I GUESS lol.
( About how it’s a long, long, long journey that we’ve been on And it’s a long long long story that shall be told And it’s a long long day, and we’ve come a long long way But there’s still a long way to go
It’s a long long long way It’s a long long strong way It’s a long long long way Forward - [x] )
[index] [patreon] [comicfury]
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justabeewithapen · 3 months ago
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Sniling so widely at the critters
What’s the dynamic when Doey, Lucas, and Bella are together?
GRINNING SO BIG BACK AT YOU!!! I have so much I am so sorry here, have a doodle before I throw you into the read more:
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Their dynamic is very much like siblings. There is definitely a reason they usually only use one at a time as being in a group together emboldens all three of them. It is hard to fully describe the change, but when they are all together you can actually tell they are kids, they act like kids. Being put together is generally a reward for particularly good behavior (conditioning always works better if you mix both positive and negative reinforcement, even if they lean negative) and VERY OCCASIONALLY they are allowed things like crayons or books. Lucas has self proclaimed himself the older brother of their squad which he takes very seriously, which really doesn't mean very much besides the fact he is very loud, loves to "older sibling" brag (make stuff up haha), and thinks he is really funny. He is the one that gets the energy going in a room, and if there is a tussle it's probably his fault. Bella is a very obvious contrast to that, she is quiet and would much rather go with the flow of whatever is happening than take charge like Lucas. However, I think she is hiding a sneaky side under there that doesn't come out very often, but if given the chance to grow up normally she would probably enjoy pranks and get away with them. She likes to draw and she likes listening to stories. She's much stronger than she looks, Lucas knows this first hand (if Doey was in a normal situation/environment he would probably know her "wrath" too.) Doey has the most noticeable shift, and it would be even more if he wasn't in his current circumstances. (I wrote a ton a ton here but I think I'll save it for a second post). It's kinda hard to explain? Big ole' "it depends" I suppose? Sometimes he is more in-line with Lucas, more mischievous and playful, liberally using his abilities to make up for their lack of playthings. Sometimes it is more like a contented air where he will just sit and listen while the other two do their own thing, but he'll still be an active part of conversation. They talk a lot, all three of them, there aren't many occasions where they can talk and feel listened to. Even Bella who is more quiet. It's the only opportunity for play they ever get, unlike some of the experiments in other sections of the building. Obviously if things are not great(tm) for one of them the energy mellows out more, but even if it isn't acknowledged they treat these opportunities like it will be the last time it ever happens. I don't even know if I answered the question right at this point T-T I have been typing and retyping this for hours at this point. It's like, I know it but I don't know how to say it. They act like siblings, sibling who are keenly aware they are all each other has, while still being themselves as much as they can while they have the chance. Being able to all be together without having to worry if anyone is alright genuinely is a reward for them, and it just makes punishments more effective. I think they used to be more reserved, especially Doey who is very keenly aware of being observed like 24/7, but it wasn't worth caring about, they didn't have that luxury. It probably freaked the hell out of several scientists observing him who are generally more used to "Perpetual glower", or "intentionally trying to push your buttons", and on good days "quiet compliance". He got along with critters in places like the courtyard, but he was generally avoided by other toys because he is massive and scary looking, when he walks the ground literally shakes in game. It would be worth looking into more to find a less volatile way to control him, if he wasn't considered such a liability and didn't already have a body count pre-HOJ Man I hope this doesn't suck to read TwT sorry for the messy word vomit here!!
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atrwriting · 2 years ago
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selfish - frank castle x reader
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hey y'all back in action with another porn no plot one shot
all i'm saying is,,, they knew who their target audience was with this (or are we just all mentally ill?)
summary: frank shows you what it means to be a real, selfish man.
informal warnings: frank is the selfish man in this, but I was the selfish woman writing this. couldn't get this out of my head as I started season two of the punisher, and frankly (haha get it -- sorry) after this scene you wouldn't be able to either
as always, the actual warnings: vulnerable frank, #sadboihrs for both the reader and frank, smut, porn no plot, choking, dirty talk, and ROUGH frank
anyway... selfish:
“what’s your type?”
the million dollar question. the one that you had been troubling yourself over for years.
“my type?” you repeated, eyeing the man who asked you. “or my pattern?”
he tilted his head in curiosity. “both.”
you chuckled. “my pattern… well, they’re usually useless. man babies.”
it was his turn to chuckle. “you like taking care of them, yeah?”
you shrugged. “i love taking care of people, but not men that de-age into babies as time goes on. did you know a guy i dated asked me how to boil water once?”
“you’re joking,” he took a swig of his beer, eyeing you. “no way that’s true. made that up.”
“i wish,” you laughed, rubbing a hand over your face. “i’m also not making it up that i stayed with him two years after that.”
“sounds like your fault.”
you nodded. “the pattern made me realize what my real type is.”
“what?”
“it’s corny.”
“say it.”
a smirk attempted to appear on your lips, but you pushed it back down. “i don’t like selfless men.”
he let out a laugh in disbelief at that. “you and every other chick.”
you chuckled too. “i heard this an analogy once… if you’re falling over a cliff, would you want your person to save you? or someone else about to fall on another side of the cliff?”
he stopped talking then, listening intently.
you kept going. “obviously, i’d want the other person saved… but in my head, when i’m all alone and there’s no one that has to be saved… sometimes it’s nice to think that someone would be so selfish that they would save me over doing what’s right.”
“you could live with that though?” he asked, narrowing his eyes, a bit of judgement lacing his words.
you shrugged. “never been the person that was saved, so i’m really not sure. it’s not that i want to be saved or anything — that’s super fucking corny. but man, a fucking masculine man, putting you over other things? deciding that in that moment, you’re what matters to him? i spend all my days being selfless, putting myself in danger so other people are saved… and i’m tired.” you took a swig of your drink. “i’m really fucking tired.”
“why don’t you save yourself, then?”
“for the same reason you’re here,” you sighed. “when have we ever been selfish, frank?”
he laughed at that, but almost scoffed. “i don’t do anything i do for anyone but me.”
you swallowed then, clenching your jaw. “so many people have wronged you… but you’ve only done what you’ve done because of how people have wronged those you loved. hate to break it to you… but you’re as selfless as anyone could be.”
he folded his lips underneath his teeth and stared aimlessly off into the distance. there were bags under his dark eyes, and no amount of sleep or beer would ever take them away. the man would never know peace, and your heart broke at that. however, it was nice to know someone was going down the rabbit hole with you.
“i don’t think i’m selfless,” he finally spoke after a bit.
you raised an eyebrow at him, calling his bluff.
“i did the things i did because my family was what was most important to me,” he admitted. “that’s selfish.”
you swished his words around in your mouth a little, and decided he was right. the spin on your words made you nod, agreeing with him. “i see your point.”
“so, what?” he asked. “you want a man that would choose you over innocent people?”
you huffed, standing. “i know you know that i never said that. i’m saying that in the back of my mind, it would be nice, just once, for a selfish man to decide that i’m all he wanted. it would be nice to know that i don’t always have to carry the weight on only my shoulders.”
he didn’t say anything then, staying planted on his seat on the floor. he twisted the bottle in his hands and listened to you.
“if i’m being honest with myself…” you began, swallowing your heavy statement. “i would prefer if they saved the innocents, but only so i could die, as i probably would falling in that situation, with a clear conscience. all i’m saying is… it’s a heavy fucking burden always doing things so i don’t feel guilty.”
you walked away then, not muttering a goodbye. frank didn’t say anything either. you heard him raise the bottle to his lips once more before you shut your bedroom door behind you.
it would be an hour or so before you heard a gentle knock on your door. there was no yelling or screaming outside, so you were grateful to hear there was no imminent danger present. in your tiny pajamas, you answered the door to find none other than frank. he was leaning against a wall in the hallway that led to your door, only a couple feet from you.
he didn’t say anything when you came face to face with him. he just stared at you, placing all of his focus on your confused face. it would be a few moments of silence before he finally stepped closer to you, and placed a calloused hand on your face.
you froze. frank castle never touched you, especially in that way.
“wanna know my type?”
you stared at him and swallowed thickly. your lips parted to whisper, “sure.”
“an escape,” he whispered back. “i know what you meant by always having the dark cloud of duty hanging above your head, ready to kill any moment of peace you happen to get your damned hands on. i’ve done everything i’ve ever done for the people i loved, and i know the only way for me to experience any fuckin’ joy is with another person.”
his dark eyes held your gaze, and you soon grew lost in them and his words. you swiped your tongue across your lips and stepped closer. you could feel frank’s breath on your chin, but you couldn’t breathe. his scent, his stare, and his fucking words were more intoxicating than any alcohol you had before.
“you want an escape, frank?” you softly asked, eyes darting to his lips.
“i do,” he stated, before he lowered his head and kissed you.
his free hand immediately came up to the other side od your face and pressed against your cheek. there, he held you in the palms of his hands as you rested your hands on his thick, muscled chest. his lips were dry and cracked, but you didn’t care. the fire that brewed from his affection was enough to fill any of the cold, dark, and lonely places inside of you and you greedily drank from anything he offered.
“you want someone to want you, darlin’?” he asked in between kisses.
you hummed in agreement, not wanting to break apart your kiss for anything — even words.
“can’t get you out of my head, sweetheart,” he spoke, dipping his tongue into your mouth. “need to feel those long legs around me.”
you whimpered at his words, letting his tongue dance with yours. you could taste the heineken on his tongue and savored every bit. “please, frank… i need to feel you so badly.”
“i’ve got you, darlin’.” he picked you up by the backs of your thighs and you wrapped your legs around him. the pads of frank’s finger tips dug into your flesh and a warmth spread throughout you. “those fuckin’ legs.”
you would’ve giggled, but you were too consumed with the very touch of frank to even care. you pulled at his shirt and threw it over his head, sad to break the kiss for even a second. you immediately went to his neck and began to nip at the thick skin, causing a growl to rumble in the deepest parts of his rib cage.
“y’drive me fuckin’ crazy,” he grunted. “sweetest fuckin’ kisses.”
“oh, frank…” you moaned against his neck before he threw you onto the bed. you turned over onto your back to face him. he locked eyes with you as he stood over you, muscles naturally flexed as he undid his belt. your mouth watered at the sight of the fucking man before you, taking off his belt for only you. the way his shoulders, pectorals, and arms worked in the dim light of your room… that man would be the death of you. you hissed, “you’re such a tease.”
he smirked at that, throwing the belt somewhere in the distance. “think you’ve just never been with a real man before,” he replied, before engulfing you into another kiss.
frank’s hand dipped into your shorts and immediately went for your slit. your body fucking sang at finally being touched the way you needed to be as you arched your back into frank, his chest pressed against yours. when frank began to run rough circles around your clit, nothing could hold back your moans or him swallowing them whole.
“only took off my belt, and this is how wet you get?” he asked, biting down on your neck. his long, thick middle finger dipped inside of you as his thumb worked at your clit. he tapped against your upper wall and you keened into his touch, whimpering his name. “now i know it’s the men before me. barely doing a fuckin’ thing and i’ve got you like this.”
you nodded pathetically, just wanting him to continue. “it feels so good,” you gasped, bucking your hips into his hand. “please, please — don’t stop, frank.”
he leaned over and pressed his chest against yours before his lips found your neck once more. his kisses were wet and sloppy, and there was nothing better than feeling the weight of a strong man above you working at your needy pussy. his rough movements against your sensitive skin were sending you into a frenzy as if nothing mattered in the world besides frank — your world started and ended there. your body felt hot — steaming from everything this man was doing for you with barely any effort. your whimpers and gasps fueled frank’s movements as if he couldn’t get enough of them.
“such a good girl f’me,” he said before he bit down on your neck and kissed the spot. “y’get so worked up, i want to see what it’s like when you fall apart.”
“i’m so close, frank…” your voice was hoarse and full of lust, and you were about to break any moment.
“that’s it, baby, yeah,” he spoke, slipping a second finger inside of you. “cum all over these fingers baby. let me taste you after.”
“fuck, fuck, fuck —!”
your world came crashing down onto you. your strength was no match for frank’s, but with the way your back arched and body curled into him, your chests both rose off the bed. he wrapped a strong arm underneath the curve of your back as you fucking sobbed his name, holding you to him and supporting your weight.
“that’s it, darlin’,” he grunted against your ear. “yeah — that’s it. keep cumming for me, fuck…”
your hands grabbed at his thick biceps and you grew lost in his movements against the most sensitive parts of you that never ceased. your hips were rolling in circles with his fingers and your vision went hazy.
“so beautiful like this f’me,” he groaned. “might be mean and not let you stop.”
“fuck, frank,” you cried, whimpering for him. your body fell limp against his arm, and he lowered your bodies back down to the bed. during your comedown, frank kissed at your neck as his free hand ran up and down your body. his other hand continued to rub against your pussy and it was driving you fucking crazy. “let me ride you — please.”
your voice was full of desperation, and frank smirked down at you. he slipped his fingers out of you and rolled off of you onto the bed. you tugged his pants down to his thighs, not wanting to waste any time. you were so greedy, but he didn’t care. he smirked as he watched you pull down your tiny shorts. you straddled him, pressing his chest to yours, as you sank down onto his thick cock.
“my fucking god —“ you gasped, your pussy stretching around him.
frank immediately grabbed your throat and you sucked in a sharp breath at the sight. he placed the tips of his fingers in his mouth, and tasted your juices that remained on his skin. there you were, impaled on his cock, hovering over him as you watched the most sensual thing you had ever seen him do. his dark eyes were locked on yours, but your lips parted as you watched him taste you. only a smirk remained on his lips.
“sweetest fuckin’ pussy i’ve ever tasted,” he spoke. “now show me how she rides me.”
he roughly pushed you upwards so you stood up straight. the angle made a whimper leave your lips, as he was now fully inside of you and the deepest anyone has ever been. you planted a limp hand on his stomach, and began to roll your hips against his.
his calloused hands found your hips as he threw his head back against the bed. the tendons in his neck were on full display as he stretched his head back as far as he could. the pleasure he felt was spreading all throughout his body, and he couldn’t help but go taut at the feeling. you watched his mouth fall agape and his eyes close as a moan pushed passed his lips.
the pads of his fingers dug into your hips and pushed you forward and back. even his fingers were strong and had control over you, and you couldn’t help but willingly give everything over to him. your whines filled the room, getting lost in your own pleasure with him. there was nothing like the sight of being thrown into vulnerable pleasure with the man under you, succumbing to your touch.
“fuckin’ god —“ he moaned, raising his head back up to keep his eyes locked on where your bodies connected. “never felt so fuckin’ good.”
his hoarse voice caused you to move faster as you ground your hips against his. his hands were rough and desperate as they pulled you up, down, back and forth — until you didn’t know which way was anything. all you knew were the directions of frank’s hands, and you followed in suit as he dragged you down another road of ecstasy.
“greedy fuckin’ pussy,” he groaned. “never enough for her, huh? needs more, even after what i did?”
“yes, yes,” you whimpered pathetically. “your cock feels so good, frank. so fucking good.”
“yeah, darlin’, that’s it,” he grunted, brown scrunching together. “such a good fuckin’ girl f’me.”
“fuck, frank — don’t say that,” you cried loudly, biting your lip. “feels too good when you say that — i can’t cum yet.”
he immediately reached for your neck and pulled you down to him. you gasped at his rough touch, but your hips never stopped. he bent his knees so your ass could bounce off of them, giving you more leverage. his cock curled deeper into you, hitting your cervix.
“oh my — god —“ you sobbed so close to his lips.
“nah, baby, that’s not how this works — you’re gonna take everything fuckin’ i give you,” he grunted. “i know y’want to be a good girl f’me, yeah?”
“yeah, yeah, yes —“ you were incoherent at this point, ready to tell frank anything he wanted to hear as he bucked his hips into yours. “frank, i’m so close — how —“
“love a needy pussy like this,” he spoke, pulling you closer by the throat for a kiss. “you gonna be good to me? you gonna cum around my cock?”
“fuck, yes —“ you sobbed. “i want you to cum with me, baby, fill me up.”
that set him off. he rolled both of you over before you even knew what was happening. he had you pressed against the bed, hand still around your throat. you grabbed at his arm, loving having the feeling of his strong muscles hold you down. you wrapped your legs around his back as he threw his hips into you. over, and over, he drove himself inside you.
“dirty fuckin’ girl,” he growled, biting down on the skin of where your neck and shoulder met.
that was it. that was how you crumbled a second time for frank that evening.
you fucking wailed his name.
you grabbed at every part of him you could, struggling to hold on for dear life. your body shook with convulsions as your pussy tightened around him, locking his cock in place. nothing could stop his strong hips as they continued to rut into you — riding out your second orgasm of that evening.
you fell back against the bed, fucked out and gasping for air pathetically. frank pressed several kisses to your neck before he stood up on his knees, leaving your weak body below him. you pushed yourself to your elbows with whatever strength you could muster. frank grabbed you by the hips and you watched him slam his hips into yours.
you watched his forehead scrunch as his mouth fell agape. his chin was almost tucked to his neck as his eyes never left where his cock fucked into you.
“use me just like that, baby,” you cried. “i want your cum inside me.”
his strong, trim body went taut as his orgasm hit him, and you watched hungrily as the man before you fell vulnerable to the only pleasure he could allow himself these days. you watched as his conscious mind slipped further and further into the sensation until every ounce of stress and exhaustion left his face. you couldn’t help but bite your lip in pride and satisfaction — knowing that you will never see a more beautiful sight like frank castle using your body to get off.
you fucking loved selfish men.
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DO YOU SEE WHAT I MEAN NOW EVERYONE GO WATCH THIS SCENE -L xox
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